


When you mess with fate

by JoTerry



Category: Bleach
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-06
Updated: 2017-04-06
Packaged: 2018-10-15 10:01:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 48,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10554448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JoTerry/pseuds/JoTerry
Summary: Kurosaki Ichigo and Kuchiki Rukia thought that fate had finally bestowed them the eternity they worked so hard for to be together. Little did they know, Yhwach's curse would throw another curveball at them even after his defeat.





	1. Prologue: Don't say goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> This was posted on FFnet as one of my canon-compliant 686-redemption fic. The prologue was initially a oneshot entitled 'Don't say goodbye', which was inspired by Skillet's 'Say Goodbye'. But I've decided to include it with the main fic on AO3. Almost every chapter comes with an author's note to explain why I wrote it that way. Before you ask any questions, I would appreciate it if you read the notes first.
> 
> I'm gradually moving my fics from FFnet here. It's something to keep me occupied since I can't seem to write any IchiRuki fics for a while now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did, it would've ended differently.

It has been a month since Yhwach was destroyed. Most of the higher-level _shinigami_ are more or less healed. The only ones that remain at the Fourth Division barracks are mostly unseated officers who will take longer to recuperate, and the humans. All the Arrancar have returned to Hueco Mundo to reconstruct their world.

Here at the First Division, the surviving _taichou_ and _fukutaichou_ gather for a meeting with Kyouraku- _soutaichou_. As most of them are still recovering, they are all seated in a _seiza_ style instead of how they used to conduct their meetings with the late Yamamoto- _soutaichou_. It is their first meeting after the war was over. As expected, the _soutaichou_ will be announcing their plans from here forth.

Keeping her head bowed at the far end of the captain-commander's left hand side, Kuchiki Rukia feels a tug in her chest as she remembers how she used to sit behind Ukitake- _taichou_ at meetings like these. She truly misses the kind man who was a father figure to her. She knows deep inside that whoever takes over his place will never hold a candle to his leadership.

" _Yare, yare_ ," Kyouraku- _taichou_ 's voice breaks Rukia out of her reminiscence. "As your new _soutaichou_ , I wish to thank all of you for your hard work throughout the war. I know you need your rest, so I'll make it short and sweet like my Nanao- _chan_."

 _Whack!_ "Focus, _soutaichou_!"

Snorts are heard. Some sigh in annoyance while others choose to ignore the usual antics between the _soutaichou_ and his dark-haired _fukutaichou_ as the former adjusts his _sakkat_ with a smirk to the latter. Ise- _fukutaichou_ rolls her eyes and straightens out the stack of papers in the clipboard, which she used to hit her captain on the head.

Kyouraku clears his throat before he speaks again, "Before we proceed, let's have a moment of silence to remember our comrades who fought to their last breath for us. Without their dedication, courage, and fighting spirit, we would not be gathered here today."

Following his order, the captains and lieutenants in the hall bowed their heads. It has been a month but everyone knows that it will probably take a lifetime for them to get over the deaths of their fellow _shinigami_ whom they have worked together with for years, some even centuries.

As Rukia lifts her head after that short moment, she sees Renji giving her a sad but reassuring smile from behind her brother. She returns the gesture with a small smile of gratitude. They haven't spoken much in the past month as she has been spending most of her time with Ichigo at the Fourth Division. After Ichigo was discharged, the two hung out a lot at the barracks of the 13th as the substitute helped her sort out the office she used to share with Ukitake- _taichou_. Renji was also busy with reports while his captain went around the Seireitei with some other captains to determine how to go about with the repair of Soul Society. Still, as her childhood friend, the redhead knows Rukia is having a hard time grieving and re-organising the division on her own.

"So," Kyouraku booms, earning another eye-roll from his _fukutaichou_. The rest of the _shinigami_ present look up to hear what he has to say. "After a thorough investigation by Sui-Feng- _taichou_ , Hirako- _taichou_ , Kuchiki- _taichou_ , Hitsugaya- _taichou_ , Kurotsuchi- _taichou_ , and myself, we have come up with a plan on the reconstruction of the Seireitei."

Ise- _fukutaichou_ hands her clipboard over to Kyouraku who skims through the document attached. He then lifts his eyes to glance around the _shinigami_ in the hall, takes a deep breath, and begins, "We have found that there is still a massive amount of Yhwach's _reiatsu_ which has remained in all the locations he had been before his end. We do not know how long it will take for this energy to dissipate. According to Kurotsuchi- _taichou_ , under normal condition of the Seireitei, it will take at least 30 years for it to disappear entirely.

"However, given the destruction that has befallen our world, there is no certainty if it will vanish even after a hundred years. Kurotsuchi- _taichou_ has taken a sample of this _reiatsu_ for analysis. He and his team will immediately research on ways to accelerate its dissolution when his laboratory becomes fully functional.

"As such, we will begin reconstruction work with his barracks before proceeding to repair the rest of the Gotei 13 stations. Only then, will we be able to pick up the pieces for the rest of Seiretei and Rukongai."

He looks up again at the faces of all the worn-out survivors of the Thousand-Year Blood War before he continues, "We have also found that the _reiatsu_ is seeping through the gates in small amounts. We do not know if these amounts will increase through time but it is highly perilous to residents outside of the Seireitei. Presently, the _garganta_ has been sealed to protect the inhabitants of Hueco Mundo. The Arrancar have all been informed of this and as it is already in our agreement that they will find alternative means of substance to replace the human souls, they will not be making an appearance in the world of the living. Hence, the _senkaimon_ will also be sealed until such time that we are certain that Yhwach's energy is completely gone."

Rukia furrows her brows when she hears the _soutaichou_ 's last statement. From across the hall, Byakuya casts her a solemn gaze, which only she can decipher from his stoic expression. _Does that mean that..._

"So there will be no travelling to and from the living world when that gate is sealed?" Yadomaru- _taichou_ asks.

Kyouraku dips his hat a little. He knows this will be a topic of concern for the Visored as they have made their home in the world of the living for over a hundred years. "Yes, that's rite, Lisa."

"What about the Visored?" Otoribashi- _taichou_ queries. "Some of us prefer to stay back in the world of the living. And I know I'm also speaking for Shinji, Kensei and Lisa, that we would still like to drop by once in a while even though we are stationed here."

It is Shinji who speaks up this time, being a part of the investigation team. "Rose, after our discussion of this issue, we've come to the conclusion that the four of us will have to stay in the Seireitei until the _senkaimon_ is ready to open once again."

"What?" Muguruma- _taichou_ exclaims but goes into a fitful cough.

The Fifth Division waits patiently for his comrade to settle down. "I'm sorry, Kensei. But this is the only way. We need to prevent any more of Yhwach's energy from entering the world of the living. The humans will die if they are exposed to it in high quantity. The unseated Visored will leave with the humans and stay there to assist in performing _konso_ on plusses. We will have a small gateway to allow souls with very minimal _reiatsu_ to enter Soul Society. This is for the purpose of soul governance to ensure the total souls in the human world and here remain balanced. Any soul, living or dead, with high _reiatsu_ will not be able to travel between the two worlds until the _senkaimon_ is open again."

Muguruma- _taichou_ sighs deeply. This means being separated from Mashiro and the rest for _kami_ -knows how long. He nods in understanding. Lisa bites her lip as she picks on her nails while Rose's fists are clenched on his lap but he remains silent. They all know they have to make sacrifices in order for Soul Society to get back to its former state.

" _Soutaichou_..."

All eyes turn to the direction where the voice comes from at the end of the hall.

"Yes, Kuchiki- _fukutaichou_ ," Kyouraku acknowledges.

"When will the _senkaimon_ be sealed?" she asks, fighting the anxiety building up within her. It cannot mean what she thinks it means. Even as she is looking at the pink _haori_ -clad man at the other end of the hall, she can feel her brother's concerned eyes on her.

"Tomorrow, Rukia- _chan_ ," Kyouraku replies solemnly. "After all the humans and some of the Visored have made their final journey back to world of the living..."

* * *

 

Rukia stands at the edge of the Sokyoku Hill after the meeting as she tries to think of the best way to break it to Ichigo. She has sent a _jigokucho_ to tell him to meet her here in an hour. One hour is all she has to prepare herself. She also doesn't want to delay the inevitable seeing as they do not have much time together. He will be leaving tomorrow morning with the rest and she doesn't know if she will ever see him again.

It is ironic how fate seems to always get in their way. They'd thought that with Yhwach gone and there is finally peace between the three worlds, they could finally be together. Her mind drifts back to two weeks ago when it happened.

 _It was late in the evening when they'd finished sorting out the second cabinet of files in the office. Rangiku had dropped by with some_ bento _meals she bought from one of the few_ izakaya _that was not destroyed during the war. Ichigo and Rukia were grateful for that because it meant that they did not have to leave the barracks of the 13th. They were too tired after a whole day of cleaning and organising the mess that was left since the war._

 _Sitting on the_ tatami _floor against the inner wall of the office with his legs spread out, he motioned for Rukia to sit next to him after she had discarded their meal boxes. She slumped down lazily and leaned into him when he put an arm around her shoulders. It was nothing new to them, this proximity between them. Years back, during her stay at the Kurosaki Clinic, they would hang out like that on the rooftop after a hollow hunt, just gazing at the stars in companionable silence._

_Rukia was about to doze off to the comfort of Ichigo's warmth when he lightly pushed her head towards him and planted a lingering kiss on the side while inhaling the scent of her hair. She was stunned for a moment as she turned to look at him, heat rising in her cheeks. He had never kissed her before._

_"Ichigo..."_

_His amber eyes gazed back at her. The two were quiet again, just staring into each other's eyes before Ichigo lifted his free hand to caress and then, cup her cheek. As their eyes held a quiet conversation, the corner of his lips tilted upwards a little and he brought them down to gently touch hers._

_She gasped and for a moment she didn't know what to do but eventually, she returned the kiss. It was intimated. It conveyed a message of true and strong feelings, which they held for each other for a long time. Time, that never allowed their relationship to progress any further._

_When they broke apart for air, Ichigo lifted her light body and sat her on his lap, wrapping both arms around her. "I was afraid we would never have this moment." His voice was low and husky in her ear._

_Rukia blushed even more, her heart racing in her chest she knew he could hear it too. "I didn't think you'd feel this way," she said, her fingers skittering across his jaw where a light stubble had grown. This_ ryoka _was no longer the 15-year-old boy whose life she crashed into._

_He enclosed her hand in his and brought it up to kiss the skin on the inside of her wrist, keeping his eyes fixed on hers before he said, "I was close to giving up during the fight with that Quincy bastard when I thought of how far I've come to be who I am. All those adventures I had with you kept me alive and I wanted to live so I would be able to see you again. So I would be able to tell you how I feel about you." He placed her hand on his chest above where his heart was beating so she could feel that it was reverberating the same rhythm as hers._

_She chuckled nervously, biting her lower lip while her violet eyes sparkled in elation. "Wow, that coming from Kurosaki Ichigo, saviour of the worlds."_

_The orange-haired_ shinigami _tightened his hold around her with a scowl on his face as he pinched her thigh through her_ shihakusho _. "And that's the last time I'm saying crap like that, Midget."_

Slapping his chest, she snapped, "Call me that again, you overgrown strawberry and I'll..."

_Her threat was lost when he crashed his lips upon hers, her words swallowed by him as he teased her mouth over and over again until she granted his tongue access to dance with hers._

_What was meant to be a playful make-out session escalated into something passionate which they never expected to happen. But there was no regret or second guesses and it was how they would express their love for each other many nights that followed. They felt the bond they shared all these years had finally been sealed into a covenant. It was a night that held the promise of an eternity together._

"Rukia?"

She turns to the concerned voice next to her. She is so lost in thoughts she doesn't realise that Ichigo has arrived at the Sokyoku Hill. So lost she doesn't realise there is a trail of tears down each of her cheeks.

"What's wrong?" he asks, cupping her face with both hands and wiping the tears with the pad of his thumbs.

Damn... It isn't in her plan to tell him the news immediately upon his arrival. She doesn't know how to begin. So she does the first thing she can think of. She wraps her arms around his torso and holds him really tight.

He doesn't know what is going on so he returns the embrace, resting his chin atop her head. The only time he has seen her cry was before Byakuya and Renji took her away from him. This time, though, the tears look accidental. There are no sniffles. It's like she didn't mean to cry. She still has that unwavering Kuchiki mask on. Maybe she's emotional about Ukitake- _taichou_. She just came out of the captain and lieutenant meeting, after all. Why else would she have asked him to meet her here? This is the place where she always seeks solitude, as ironic as it may seem that it is the place she was almost executed.

After a while, she pushes away from him, takes his hand, and leads him to sit down at the edge of the hill. With their legs dangling off the cliff, he waits for her to say what is on her mind. He knows that in time, she will. They have no secrets. That's how much they trust each other.

"Promise me you won't freak out?" she requests.

He scoffs. "When you ask me that, it simply means you know I _will_ freak out. I can't promise you anything, then. What is it?"

She drags out a breath, steadies herself, and says, "Kyouraku- _soutaichou_ has issued a decree to seal the _senkaimon_ tomorrow."

He furrows his brows as he looks at her. "Meaning?"

She touches a palm to his face. "Ichigo, they are ceasing all travels between the human world and the Seireitei after you leave."

"For how long?" he asks, his voice trembles a little. From the look on her face, he already knows this is going to have a horrible impact on their relationship.

"No one knows yet. It is to prevent Yhwach's deadly _reiatsu_ from going across to your world," she replies. _Your world_ , she says. Because that's how it is, still. They are both from two separate worlds. The man who wanted to merge those two worlds, they had already had him killed.

Ichigo shakes his head very slowly, it almost look like he doesn't move at all. "The guy is dead. I'm sure his _reiatsu_ will eventually die with him."

"Yes, it will. But what's left of him is huge and it's scattered all over the Seireitei. It will take many, many years for it to completely die off. And because Seireitei is struck so bad, it'll take even longer for that to happen," Rukia explains.

"So, what now? I'm not allowed to come back here to visit you?"

"I'm sorry," she chokes.

He takes her hands in his. "I'm going to find a way to come back. It's what I always do."

"Ichigo..." She draws his hands up to her lips and kisses his fingertips. This time she can feel the stinging in her eyes. It is so hard. They are both trying to stay calm. Ichigo is trying to think of a solution. But she knows there isn't any except to wait it all out. "I know it's not going to be easy. But I need you to do something for me."

He swallows. He doesn't nod. He knows Rukia is going to suggest something incredulous.

"Please go home and live a normal life. You deserve that. You don't even have to be a _shinigami_ anymore. There will be some Visored stationed there to perform _konso_. The Arrancar has agreed not to enter the human world anymore and feed only on the souls that are sent to Hueco Mundo. A small gateway to cross over here will be built but it is only for those plusses with very little _reiatsu_. So, don't even think of dying prematurely to get here. That gateway won't be able to hold yours," she pleads.

He takes his hands back and folds his arms across his chest. He wants to shut her out because he cannot accept what she is telling him to do. "What normal life? Right now, this is the only life I know that's normal to me. How long did they say it would take for that damn energy to disappear, Rukia?"

"Maybe even a hundred years." She, too, crosses her arms. She does it to prevent her walls from crumbling. She can almost hear the cracks now.

"No," he says defiantly. "I'm sure Mayuri will come up with something."

"He is trying to but it will take time. We need to repair his lab before he can start his research. And even if there is a way he can speed it up, it'll still probably take one lifetime of yours before the _senkaimon_ can be opened again." She grips the sleeves of her _shihakusho_.

"I cannot live like that. I cannot go back and think everything is okay when I know I may not see you again. If that's the case, I'd rather stay here."

Why is he so stubborn? Then again, it is this part of his character that attracts her to him. He is always so determined, so persuasive.

She smiles but her lips twitch as she tries to hold back a sob. "You're not dead yet, idiot. You can't stay here. It will interfere with the balance of souls. Besides, your sisters need you. Our friends need you. You need to go home," she pauses as her voice begins to quiver. "Continue your studies. Get a job. Date. Marry a human girl. Have a bunch of kids and live till you're old and grey before you die a happy death."

A tear escapes Ichigo's eye. It's not fair. They just started this thing that they have always wanted. Their promise. Their covenant. Why is fate such a cruel thing? "You're asking too much of me, Midget," he says through gritted teeth.

It is funny how his nickname for her that used to enrage her now sounds so endearing. She would give anything to hear his voice calling her that for the rest of eternity. But nothing she gives will ever be enough to change their destiny. Whoever up there who carved their lives to entwine with the string of fate only to cut it off in the end must have been an atrocious being.

"I'm sorry, Ichigo." Now, she lets the wall crumble. She lets go of all she has and cries her heart out.

He immediately takes her into his arms. She should not have to apologise. It isn't her fault. They both hold each other like that for a long time. When her eyes become heavy, Ichigo _shunpo_ them back to her room in the 13th Division barracks where he lays her down on the futon they have been sharing for the past few weeks. Instead of dozing off, though, she pulls him down to kiss him and they hold a vigil of a night of passion that would be their last.

They do not sleep a wink until the sun rises in the morning and they know they have barely an hour left to be together.

Ichigo nudges the wide-eyed Rukia on his bare chest who is staring into space. She looks up at him and gives him a smile that does not reach her eyes. "I can't say it's a good morning."

"Neither can I," he sighs and digs into his _shihakusho_ on the floor beside him. He pulls out a small velvet box and holds it on his chest in front of her.

Her jaw drops as she gets up slowly and leans her weight on her elbow. "Wha-?"

"I got it yesterday when you were at the meeting," he says. "I guess I can't tell you to marry me anymore."

Tears pool in her eyes. She is speechless as she sits up and stares at the box.

Ichigo also gets up and opens the box to reveal a platinum ring with an amethyst stone. "If fate was on our side, would you have married me, Rukia?"

She is sobbing now. Her shoulders shaking uncontrollably as she covers her mouth with her hand and nods.

He sniffles. His eyes are red but he wants to remain the stronger one. He takes the ring out of the box and slips it on her finger. It fits her so beautifully. His amber eyes, in all its weaknesses and brokenness gaze into their mirror in hers. He gives her a chaste kiss on the lips.

Rukia shakes her head. "I can't accept this, though. I will never be able to be your wife, Ichigo."

He kisses her lips again and then, the ring. "I picked this one for you. No one else will ever wear this. _Tou-san_ brought me to this shop in the First District to get it. The crazy old man was so excited when I asked him where I could find something like this. He's going to be so devastated."

"Were you planning to propose last night?" she asks.

He nods. "Yes. I wanted to do it before I leave. It just felt like it's the right thing to do. I thought we could maybe get married once I'm done with my studies."

Rukia lies back down on the futon, pulling him down with her and they become one for the last time.

When the _senkaimon_ opens, they keep their eyes on each other for as long as they can. They don't say goodbye.

_Things are changing_

_It seems strange and_

_I need to figure this out_

_You've got your life_

_I got mine_

_But you're all I cared about_

_Yesterday we were laughing_

_Today I'm left here asking_

_Where has all the time gone now_

_I'm left alone somehow_

_Growing up and getting older_

_I don't want to believe it's over_

_Don't say goodbye_

_Cause I don't wanna hear those words tonight_

_Cause maybe it's not the end for you and I_

_And although we knew_

_This time would come for me and you_

_Don't say anything tonight_

_If you're gonna say goodbye_

 


	2. Chapter 1: Inoue dies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rukia's POV (47 years after the end of the Thousand-Year Blood War)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

I come to a stop at the balcony of the hospital room in time to see two figures separating from their bodies. That has got to be my fastest  _shunpo_  in all my  _shinigami_  life –  _Nii-sama_  would be proud. I am still trying to catch my breath as I shamelessly eavesdrop on their conversation. The right side of my body is pressed tightly against the wall as I peer in enough through the glass sliding door to observe the interaction between my two friends with loud-coloured hair standing there, facing each other.

Orihime's body is lying still under the white blanket of the hospital bed; her greyed hair neatly framing her slightly wrinkled face. Her eyes are shut. She looks peaceful. Ichigo's  _gigai_ , who has aged accordingly, is bent over her body, bawling its heart out.  _Poor Kon,_  I think to myself.

The woman, whose soul form does not look a day over 18, gazes up at her husband with her tear-filled eyes. I've been told that human souls always keep the same look they had at the prime of their lives. This is the first time I see it happening to someone I'm familiar with. I can see how emotional she is. Just last month when I visited, she told me she was prepared to go. She was only waiting for Kazui to come back from Nagoya where he has a job posting. The cancer has spread to the other parts of her body by then. She said she has led a happy life, married to the man of her dreams, and has seen her son's graduation from the university. She said she was ready to let go of this life, and even if she will not remember it when she crosses over, she is contented with what she has already experienced.

My heart aches so badly for her. She is one of my closest human friends. I want so much to go in there and give her one last goodbye hug for all the times she has fought alongside me, for that one time when she went to Soul Society to help Ichigo rescue me from my execution, for all the times she has healed me, and for all the times she has trusted me with her insecurities. We've been friends for 50 years. It just seems so unfair that I don't get to comfort her one last time before she leaves us for good.

But I know she needs this last moment with Ichigo. She has loved him since they were 15, maybe even earlier than that. So I just watch from the side and give them their moment. Kazui has probably just stepped out of the room when Orihime's human body breathed her last. I remember her telling me how she wanted to see her son for the last time but she didn't want him to witness her go.

"So, this is it," I hear her say, between sniffles. Her arms cross firmly below her breasts.

Ichigo nods as he carefully brushes her tears away with his knuckles. The sight of both of them in their soul form brings back fond memories of when we were comrades so many years ago. I am trying so hard to fight back my own tears. I know I am going to miss her so damn much.

"Don't worry. I'll take care of Kazui," he says, pulling her into an embrace.

She wraps her arms tightly around his torso in return as she squeezes her eyes shut, inhaling his scent for the last time. "I love you, Ichigo," she sobs.

"I know," he sighs.

I can feel the first drops of my tears now and I just...

Wait a minute.

'I know'?

'I KNOW'?

 _For the love of_ kami _, at least for one last time, arsehole, couldn't you have said it back to her? One freaking last time!_  I yell in my head at the overgrown berry as I clench my fists. Is this his way of saying goodbye to his wife of 42 years? Kurosaki Ichigo and his fucking pride! He's so going to get it from me. Maybe. Once the whole mourning period is over, that is.

They hold each other like that until we hear the roar of a hollow in the distance. That is my cue to go. I make my presence felt to let them know that I will take care of the hollow. Ichigo glances over his shoulder at me but I am looking at Orihime. She gives me a small and sad smile, her arms wrapped tightly around Ichigo, who has one of his around her shoulders and one hand gripping the hilt of Zangetsu. Orihime and I nod at each other. I mouth a 'goodbye' and send a flying kiss to her, swallowing the lump in my throat and blinking away my tears. I reluctantly turn away before heading towards the direction of the hollow in a  _shunpo_.

After my second landing, I look back in time to see Ichigo pressing the hilt of his  _zanpakutou_  to his wife's forehead. I choke back my tears and focus on my duty of purifying the hollow so it doesn't get to Orihime before she completely disappears forever.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was working on another fix-it fic when this one came to my mind and the ideas just flowed like water from a broken tap. (I kept telling myself that I needed to give it a rest so I would have happy fic ideas but my brain was defying me.) I'd even gotten the whole storyline written out and properly chaptered the moment this particular chapter came about. 
> 
> Thanks for reading. As I have mentioned in the prologue, I would really appreciate it if you read the author's notes before asking any questions. Any rude and immature reviews from non-fans/shippers will be politely ignored. Don't want to waste precious brain cells on entertaining nonsense. 
> 
> Jo
> 
> Originally written on 29 August 2016


	3. Chapter 2: The first of many secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seventh week of mourning...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

The  _senkaimon_  opened to reveal a  _shinigami_   _taichou_  berating a tall  _fukutaichou_  from another division for causing them to be late. The  _fukutaichou_  only sighed in defeat, as he was too tired to argue with his short childhood friend. He had completely forgotten about their plan today and had gone off to the Rukongai to have a quick drink with Ikkaku, Yumichika, and Shuuhei.

The humans had decided to pay Orihime's grave a weekly visit for seven weeks after her death as a mark of respect for her. Today was the last of these visits. Rukia and Renji made it a point to come over to the living world to show their support to their friends, especially Ichigo and Kazui. After donning on their  _gigai_ , which were modified to look the same age as the rest of their 65-year-old friends, they made their way to a coffee house where they had promised to meet up with Chad and the gang before walking to the Kurosaki Clinic together.

When they arrived at the venue, the retired boxer told them to have a seat and order their drinks. Tatsuki was already there. "Ichigo just called to say that he is having a discussion with Kazui. The boy is leaving for the airport soon. He won't be coming back for a long time after this," he explained.

Tatsuki snorted. "That one is hardly a boy anymore. He's 41 years old. But I get why you would call him a boy," she remarked.

"Isn't he going to the cemetery with us?" Renji asked.

Chad replied, "Ichigo said he went early this morning on his own so he wouldn't miss his flight."

"Wait," Rukia said, her brows furrowed. "You said Kazui won't be coming back here for a long time after this?"

Chad nodded. "Yeah."

"He said he wants to focus on his new job," Tatsuki contributed as she rolled her eyes. "I bet he just doesn't want to live with Ichigo because his mother is no longer around."

"Ichigo was pretty strict with him," Chad commented.

"I would be, too," Tatsuki said. "That boy is really a handful. Seven universities in 15 years before finally getting a proper degree! If not for his mother's illness, he wouldn't have graduated at all. He only got his first job when he was almost forty. I would've smacked him a thousand times over if he were my son. Ichigo and Hime had the patience of a saint. I don't think any parent deserves a kid like that, much less Ichigo."

Rukia scoffed. "Serves him right for being such a brat when he was younger. You know what they say: like father, like son."

"But he's not..."

"Asano and Mizuiro are here," Chad declared, interrupting Tatsuki.

The two best friends came up to their booth and settled themselves in. Keigo playfully shoved the gentle giant when he sat next to Chad. "Why are you always so formal with me? You call everyone by their first names!"

Chad chuckled, "Old habits die hard."

The previous topic was then forgotten as they started to talk about the latest things that were going on in their lives.

Mizuiro was divorced for the fifth time and he now had at least ten kids to support but that wasn't a problem for him as he had always been rich.

Keigo was still not married. Although he had been dating countless women, none of them seemed perfect enough for him to want to call his wife. "I've been waiting so long for you, Rukia. When are you going to leave this pineapple head to marry me?" he pretended to cry.

" _Ano_..."

Before Rukia could say anything, Renji had already reached across the table to grab Keigo by the collar. "What did you just call me?" he demanded, gritting his teeth.

Rukia slapped his arm with the back of her hand. "Put him down, you big baboon. You're not supposed to hurt a human."

Keigo tried to pry Renji's fist off his shirt with both hands but to no avail. "Relax, man. I was just joking. And of all the things I said, you got offended by what I called you?"

Renji immediately released the brown-haired man, but not without a glare and a growl of irritation.  _Baboon, indeed._

"So, Tatsuki," Rukia began so they could have a change of subject. Again. "I remember you said you were handing over your third  _dojo_  to another student. How's that going?"

Tatsuki shrugged. "It will be officially his in a few weeks but I'm having second thoughts. I'd like to keep one for myself until I die. I was just talking to Chad about it before you guys came over. Might want him to conduct boxing classes there so I don't have to maintain the whole place on my own."

Chad grunted in reply. After winning his first championship, he became uncomfortable about this contact sport that he accidentally got involved in. He decided to go into coaching kids in Mashiba Junior High School to use it for self-defence instead. He had just retired from teaching not too long ago and had been enjoying his life for a while now; travelling all over the world on his own and had only come back to Karakura when Orihime passed away. Since he was the only one with a lot of free time on his hands, he thought he would see if Ichigo needed help. But the  _shinigami daiko_  seemed to have everything sorted out on his own. So Chad just hung around doing nothing for the past seven weeks.  _It could be a good idea to share a training gym with Tatsuki,_  he thought.

"Have you heard from Uryuu lately?" Rukia asked. The question was directed to Chad. No one had seen him in ages but the big guy had dropped Uryuu a visit in Germany last year during one of his travels.

"Still the same," was Chad's short reply.

"He's not married?"

Chad shook his head. "He doesn't want to have kids who would inherit his Quincy abilities."

They all nodded in understanding. It was no surprise to all who had been through the Thousand-Year Blood War that Uryuu felt especially guilty about it even though he had helped to destroy Yhwach.

There was a short silence as everyone thought about the raven-haired doctor. After Ryuuken had passed away, Uryuu took over his father's hospital for a while before selling all his shares off to another shareholder. He only became a doctor because he felt he owed it to the old man for helping them finish the war. Now that Ryuuken was no longer around, he decided to move to Germany and make a home there on his own. However, he would usually travel across Europe, writing about the latest fashion, and contributing his ideas to that world that had always held his true passion. Of course, no one wanted to talk about the real reason he had moved so far away from them. It definitely had more to do with Orihime than his guilt about the war.

Fifteen minutes later, Rukia said she wanted to leave earlier so she could see Kazui before he went off for  _kami_ -knows-how-long. There was a startled look on her friends' faces but no one said anything. Renji got up as well to go to the Kurosaki Clinic with her.

"It still feels weird without Orihime around in the group," Rukia commented as they walked the familiar streets towards their destination. "I mean, she would've shoved red bean flavoured tea in my face had she been there at the coffee house with us."

Renji chuckled. "You know what's even weirder?"

"What?"

"That you don't resent her in any way," he said, his voice almost inaudible.

Rukia narrowed her eyes. "Why would I resent her? She's such a nice person. She was like a sister to me."

Renji shrugged. "You know, because..."

"Bastard, don't you even go there," she snapped at him. "I've gotten over it for so long now. I've moved on, haven't I? I'm glad they were married and that he made her happy."

"You do know that's not true, right?" The tall redhead glanced at his childhood friend beside him.

"She told me she led a happy life, married to the man of her dreams. She was happy, Renji and she deserved that for being the kind and selfless person she was," she insisted, folding her arms across her chest. "Can we stop talking about it now? This is just so inappropriate."

"Yeah, yeah," he sighed in annoyance. "We're here, anyway."

The two were just about to knock on the door when they heard a lot of shouting coming from inside the Kurosaki home.

"Why do you have to make it so difficult? Your mother would've wanted you to be back here!"

"Don't you tell me about what my mother wants! You don't know a damn thing about what she wants!"

"Of course, I know. She was my wife."

"Yeah, because you didn't have a choice!"

"I'm going to choose to ignore that, son."

"You've been ignoring that for years! Whatever. I'm still going to look for him.  _Okaa-san_  is not here anymore. You can't stop me."

"Watch me, Kurosaki Kazui."

"I am not a Kurosaki!"

 _Slap!_  "I raised you!"

"But you are not my father!"

Rukia covered her mouth as she gasped in shock. She snapped her eyes towards Renji who was looking back at her, biting his lower lip anxiously. She furrowed her brows, her face full of questions. Before she could verbalise them, the door slammed open as Kazui stormed out of the house with his luggage. When he realised they had guests outside their home, his steps halted for a while as he threw glances at the two people standing awkwardly at his doorstep.

"Kazui..." Rukia reached her hand out to him.

The human boy she had seen growing up to be this man before her glared at her for a few seconds too long before he left, seemingly angrier than he was when he was having the argument with Ichigo.

_What just happened?_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter may seem a bit too informative but I wanted to show you my take on how the gang ended up who they are in 686. If you noticed, none of those who were directly involved in the war got what they really wanted, instead they got exactly what they didn't want. So I'm giving them some sort of redemption through this fic. I'm sorry I killed Inoue. I'm not doing it because I hate her or anything, because I really don't. I've always felt that she was better off with Uryuu who has given her so much attention throughout the manga. But you will soon see that Inoue plays a role in this redemption.


	4. Chapter 3: Trying to move on

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five years after Yhwach...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

Ichigo ran up the neverending hill towards his mother's grave where he would be meeting his father. The old man had sent him a text earlier to tell him to go to the cemetery because there was something important he needed to discuss with him. Incidentally, he also had something to tell his dad.

When he arrived at the top of the hill, Kurosaki Isshin was standing before his wife's tombstone, puffing a stick of cigarette. This was something he did whenever he visited her.

"What is it,  _Otou-san_?" Ichigo asked. He always made sure to sound like he didn't want to be near his father.

Isshin turned around, unfolded a canvas chair next to him, and gestured for his son to sit down. Ichigo silently did as requested. His father looked like he was in a serious mood at the moment. The doctor remained quiet until he had finished the stick. He threw the cigarette butt on the ground and crunched it with his black leather shoes.

"My  _gigai_  is failing, son," he said, breaking the silence.

Ichigo frowned. "What do you mean, it's failing? How can your  _gigai_  fail?"

Isshin crossed his arms over his broad muscular chest. "Ever since we came back from Soul Society five years ago, this body has been trying but failing to keep up with my drastically increasing power. When I first got it, I had no power at all because I gave it all up to save your mother. But now, this vessel cannot hold the amount of  _reiatsu_  that I have acquired from the war."

"So get a new  _gigai_. I'm sure Urahara- _san_  will be able to come up with something, right?"

The older man shifted in his chair to face his son. "Do you see the deterioration of my  _gigai_?" he asked waving a finger in a zig-zag over his face.

Ichigo studied his father for a brief moment. He had never really looked at the former  _shinigami_  captain because most of the time, he was always so fucking annoying. But he could see now, how his  _tou-san_  had aged. There were new lines on his face which Ichigo was pretty sure weren't there when they first got back five years ago. There were also shades of white above his ears and at his hairline above the forehead. Even though Ichigo had never really noticed all these, he was still certain they were never there before.

"I have quite a few regular patients and we have neighbours who would notice if I put on a new  _gigai_. I'm supposed to be a human and humans are supposed to grow old. It would be weird if I discarded this one for a new body," Isshin explained.

"So, what are you going to do about it?" Ichigo asked.

Isshin smirked. "I'm going to have to  _die_ , of course. Kisuke had warned me about this. He wasn't too keen on letting me come back. But I wanted to see Karin and Yuzu become adults. I wanted to hold my first grandchild. Not sure if I can get that from you, now that you and Rukia- _chan_  didn't work out."

They were both silent for a while, just staring at the inscription on Masaki's headstone. Shiba Isshin had become so much more human after he married her. He had human feelings and human desires. It seemed like such a waste of a human life if one did not live to watch their children grow up, or see their grandchildren run around the house and be able to spoil them with love.

"I'm trying not to let this body die yet. Kisuke is coming up with something temporary to help sustain it but that's all it's going to be – something temporary. I'm hoping it won't crash too soon. Otherwise, my soul would just be roaming around idle in the human world until the  _senkaimon_  can be opened again."

After Yhwach was destroyed, his massive  _reiatsu_  still lingered in Soul Society. It was seeping through the  _senkaimon_  in small amounts. The  _shinigami_  had found out that the energy would eventually cause destructions to the human world if they did not stop it from entering through the gates. That's when Kyouraku Shunsui, the  _soutaichou_  of the Gotei 13 issued a decree that the  _senkaimon_  was to be sealed until such time when Yhwach's  _reiatsu_  had completely disappeared.

With the  _senkaimon_  closed for an uncertain period of time, no souls would be able travel between the human world and the Soul Society. A small gateway for souls with very minimal  _reiatsu_  was made so that the purified plusses from the living world would be able to go through to Soul Society. This gateway could not accommodate anything of a  _shinigami_  level. Hence, no one from the other side would be able to come through to the living world. There was no way for Isshin to go back to the Seireitei if his  _gigai_  were to give way ahead of time.

"What are you going to do then when you go back to Soul Society? Annoy the shit out of every captain?" Ichigo asked. Somewhere deep inside, he knew he would miss this old man when he's gone. But he wasn't going to tell him that.

Isshin chuckled. "I have a clan to run, Ichigo. Have you forgotten that we're from a noble family as well?"

At the word 'noble', the image of a certain midget crossed his mind. Her beautiful smile, her giant violet orbs, her smooth fair skin framed by midnight black locks, the platinum ring with the amethyst stone on her finger, the tears that pooled in her eyes, the way she said his name, their painful goodbye they didn't dare to voice...

_"_ _If fate was on our side, would you have married me?"_

_"_ _Continue your studies. Get a job. Date. Marry a human girl. Have a bunch of kids and live till you're old and grey before you die a happy death."_

_"_ _You're asking too much of me..."_

Ichigo shook his head as he squeezed his eyes shut. Those memories still hurt.  _I can't believe she wants me to get married. I can't believe she wants me to have the life and death of a human before I cross over to see her again. What if I don't see her again?_

Isshin sighed, "You're going to see her again, son."

Ichigo didn't realise that he had verbalised his thoughts.

"Your soul is not a normal human soul. You're a  _shinigami_  and you will most likely not end up in Rukongai when you have passed on," his father continued.

The 23-year-old young doctor cleared his throat before speaking up again. "I've decided to marry Inoue, Dad."

Isshin turned to look at his son with a raised eyebrow. "Are you serious? You just had flashbacks of Rukia not two seconds ago and now you want to marry Inoue?"

The orange-haired young man huffed in annoyance. "Rukia told me to get married and live a normal life before I die. She asked me to 'do it for her'. I wish she didn't ask that much of me. It's crazy, I know. But..."

Isshin eyed his son accusatively. "Did you knock her up? Is that why you're..."

"I did not knock her up, old man!" Ichigo growled.

His father burst out laughing. "I'm just teasing you, Ichigo. You're still a prude like before. Boy, you've got to learn to relax a little."

_If only you knew, Dad_ , he thought.  _But it's definitely best you didn't_. "We're talking about a marriage here. It's serious business. And before you start speaking again," Ichigo paused, putting a hand up. "Inoue is pregnant. The father of the child left her. She's alone, without a family. I thought I'd take care of her and raise the child as my own."

Isshin stared at his son's face as if he didn't recognise him. "That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard, coming from you, son."

"What is so ridiculous about it? The child needs a father so I'm making myself available."

"It's that simple, huh? Just  _making yourself available_. Like you said, marriage is a serious business. I know you will never be able love Inoue because Rukia will always be the one you're hiding inside there," his father said, poking Ichigo's chest a couple of times. "You'd better think carefully about this." The older man paused to let him process what he had just said.

Ichigo bit his lip in agitation. He just wanted to get his life over and done with, do what's required of him, carry out his 'duty', and then get the hell out of here to run back to her. But that would only happen when the  _senkaimon_  was opened again.

"Son," Isshin sighed. "I can't stop you if you insist on marrying Inoue, even though I know you are doing it for the wrong reasons. But once you have done it, you have to really treat her as your wife and take care of her until death takes one of you. There will be no turning back, even if, by some miracle, Rukia- _chan_  comes back to the world of the living. You have to stick to your vow. Do you understand me?"

Ichigo's fists were clenched in his lap. His brows crunched as he swallowed.  _It's been five years and there hasn't been any news from Soul Society_ , he thought. He had visited the Urahara  _shoten_  many times to ask him if there were any messages and every time he would leave the place disappointed.

_Maybe she really wants me to move on. Maybe she really wants me live a normal life and forget about her._

Ichigo nodded. "I've thought about it. I'm going to do it, Dad," he said.

Isshin sighed again as he got up and folded his own chair. He gave his son a firm squeeze on the shoulder before leaving the cemetery.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please bear with me if you find any parts of this fic frustrating, or if I'm giving you the urge to strangle some of these characters. 
> 
> Ichigo is quite lost here. He doesn't really know what is right and what is wrong. He just wants to quickly live this life and cross over but then, he knows it's not as simple as that (with the whole Yhwach's reiatsu thing and Rukia's plea for him to be normal). 
> 
> I'm also trying to point it out to everyone, (dreaming of pointing it out to Kubo and SJ) that an earth-bound Kurosaki Ichigo and a non-shinigami Kurosaki Ichigo is a dead Kurosaki Ichigo. 
> 
> So just hang on till the very end, aight? 


	5. Chapter 4: Goodbye, Daddy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ten years after Yhwach...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

Ichigo entered his father's room to find Kazui sitting at the edge of the bed beside his 'dying' grandfather, telling him stories about robots and zombies attacking the earth. Isshin could barely move the muscles around his lips to smile at his grandson.

"Kazui," Ichigo called in a whisper.

The five-year-old boy turned around at the sound of his name. His eyes were wide and bright. He resembled his mother. But he had a little defiance in those brown orbs every time they looked at Ichigo.

" _Ojii-san_  needs to rest. Why don't you say goodbye to him?"

Kazui narrowed his eyes. "But my story's not finished yet."

"It's okay.  _Jii-san_  knows your story by heart now," Ichigo tried again.

The boy pouted and crossed his arms. "No, he doesn't."

Ichigo sighed and left the room. Minutes later, he returned with Orihime following after him.

"Kazui- _kun_ ,  _kaa-san_  is going to the park. Do you want to come along?" she asked gently, crouching down before the little boy.

His face immediately lit up as he nodded eagerly. He turned back to Isshin and placed a kiss on the old man's cheek. "Bye, bye,  _Jii-jii_. I'll be back!" And with that, he took his mother's hand and skipped downstairs with her, completely ignoring Ichigo as he passed him by.

When Isshin was certain that the mother and son had left the house, he separated himself from his  _gigai_. He had been doing this for almost a year now. To their human friends and neighbours, he was comatose. To those who knew, he was just having difficulty getting his  _gigai_  to respond. Physically, it didn't hurt one bit but it was really frustrating for him to not be able to interact with Kazui. Over the years, Isshin had become quite fond of this boy, even though he was not biologically his grandson.

Two months ago, word came from the Soul Society that the  _senkaimon_  could be opened again. Apparently, Kurotsuchi Mayuri had found a way to neutralise Yhwach's  _reiatsu_  and use it to rebuild Soul Society. Today was the day that they had scheduled to unseal it. However, the spiritual energy in Soul Society was still too unstable for the humans. So, only the soul reapers were able to travel through the  _senkaimon_  at the moment.

"It's quite amazing that that boy is a lot like you even though he does not have your genes," Isshin commented. "Are you sure he's not yours?"

Ichigo scowled. He had to agree with his father, though, about them being alike. When his mother was alive, she was everything to him and he would only listen to her. Just like how Kazui was with Orihime. He didn't really care much for his father, then. He still didn't. Not really. It was only after Isshin trained him at the  _dangai_  that they had become closer. He would probably have tried to use that method to form a bond with Kazui if the boy had any spiritual pressure. But he was just a normal human child. It was because of this that Ichigo had gotten Urahara to suppress his  _reiatsu_  after Kazui was born. The suppression, of course, cost him his  _shinigami_  powers – or whatever was left of it. But he was fine with this because...

 _"_ _Please go home and live a normal life. You deserve that. You don't even have to be a_ shinigami _anymore."_

"Are you ready to see  _her_  again?" Isshin asked, taking a seat beside his dead body. He was moving to Soul Society for good. Kuukaku had made the necessary preparations for him to move back into the Shiba manor. He would assume his position as the new head of the Shiba clan in a week.

Ichigo knew whom his father was talking about. "I will have to, sooner or later. I just didn't expect it to be so much sooner," he answered with a shrug and a tinge of regret for not waiting. But then again… "Wouldn't make any difference, though, since you said she's married to Renji."

" _And_  you're married to Orihime," his father supplied.

" _And_  I'm married, too," he parroted.

Isshin regarded his son who's standing before him, looking tired and drained out of life. The young man had mellowed down a lot since he signed those papers at the registrar's office. He felt bad for Ichigo. He had come to know about Rukia and Renji by accident during one of his recent communication with the  _soutaichou_  about his transfer back to Soul Society.

 _"_ _I have assigned Kuchiki Rukia to be the liaison between Gotei 13 and_ shinigami _associates living outside the Seireitei. She will be installed Captain of the 13th Division soon, by the way," Kyouraku Shunsui said through the communication device._

 _"_ _Oh? And I'm assuming since Kotetsu-_ san _is assisting her sister at the Fourth, Sentarou-_ san _will be Rukia-_ chan _'s_ fukutaichou _?" Isshin guessed._

 _The_ soutaichou _chuckled. "Oh, no. He's still the third seat. We haven't found a_ fukutaichou _for Kuchiki yet. We did suggest transferring Abarai Renji to her division but she said it would not be appropriate to have her partner under her command."_

_"_ _Partner?"_

_"_ _Yes. But don't ask me how that happened. All I know is that they have a child together. Anyway, I think you will be able to attend her installation as it is just one week after your return," Kyouraku said._

_Isshin smiled. "I wouldn't miss it for the world. My third daughter is going to be a captain!"_

"You're going to be okay, Ichigo," Isshin affirmed.

The young father snorted. "Of course, I'm going to be okay. Who do you think you're talking to?"

"A reckless kid who gets into trouble when he gets cocky," Isshin replied.

"That was a rhetorical question!"

He shrugged. "I'm a parent who does not deny important information from my children."

"I don't need your opinion, old man!"

"That wasn't an opinion, son. It was an 'important information'. You never listen."

"Ah, shut up!" Ichigo threw his hands up in exasperation.

Isshin laughed in amusement. A brief silence after he had calmed down, he sighed. "Just don't screw up, Ichigo."

The son's scowl softened. It was his father's last day in the human world. Sure, he would still visit and probably sneak up on him with a flying kick every once in a while. But Ichigo would not be able to see him every day like he used to. This room would soon be Kazui's once Ichigo had gotten all his father's things sorted out – some shipped to Soul Society – after the funeral in a couple of days. Isshin's body would be buried next to Masaki.

The old man would be greatly missed, especially by Kazui, who always enjoyed playing doctor in the clinic while Isshin tended to his patients. Ichigo would have to be prepared for Yuzu's 24-hour weeping because she wouldn't be able to see their father for a long time as she was still unable to see spirits as clearly as her twin. Karin wouldn't know how to offer support to her sister when it had anything to do with the goat-chin. To the dark-haired twin who had a good level of spiritual pressure, it didn't matter if Isshin's  _gigai_  was dead or alive. She would still have to keep her guard up against his surprise ambush. Ichigo took a mental note to buy enough food to last, at least until Yuzu was well again to start cooking. He couldn't trust Orihime's cooking.

"I'm going to the  _shoten_  soon. I've said my goodbye to the twins this morning. Take care of them, son. Kazui and Orihime, as well," Isshin said quietly.

"Yeah," Ichigo nodded.

After his father had leapt out through the window to  _shunpo_  towards Urahara's place, Ichigo sat on the chair beside the lifeless body lying on the bed. He was the head of the house now, just as his father would be the head of the Shiba clan in a week. The former  _shinigami_   _daiko_  wished he could switch places with his dad. Because being in the living world with the family was what Isshin really wanted and, as much as Ichigo was not supposed to admit it, Soul Society was where his heart still lay.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, Ichigo. I had to do it (make your life miserable, I mean) because Kubo did it first.


	6. Chapter 5: The inevitable meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still ten years after Yhwach...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

Rukia studied her reflection in the mirror at Urahara's  _gigai_  room. The  _getaboshi_  – as Ichigo used to call him,  _I wonder if he still does that_  – had built her a new  _gigai_  to better match her new look: black waist-length hair, yellow sleeveless dress ( _the colour suits you, Kuchiki-san,_  he had said), an inch taller. She could feel her heart thumping restlessly within this faux body. It seemed to amplify the beats like a wooden speaker.

"Are you ready?" Renji asked from behind her.

She nodded as she looked over her shoulder at his reflection. "Yup."

He cleared his throat as he took in her human girl look. She will always be the most beautiful girl he had ever known, human or  _shinigami_  form, it didn't matter. But he knew she would never be his, and he had come to accept that for a long time now. "I mean, to see him."

She scoffed, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Rukia..."

"I'm fine, fool. It'll be like old times."  _No, it won't_. "Besides, he's married now."  _To Inoue, our mutual friend, comrade_. "I heard they have a son," she said, sounding cheerful but Renji could still see through it all.

He just hoped that distance and time had somehow dulled Ichigo's senses. He highly doubted it, though. That usually oblivious idiot was always tuned to Kuchiki Rukia's behaviour and moods. Even better than he was.

"The boy had better take after Inoue. Looking like that orange-haired berry will be so, so unpleasant for him as he grows older," she continued.

"Okay." Renji nodded. He needed to get them out of here soon. He would rather impale himself upon Zabimaru than put up with her horrible acting skills. "Let's go, please."

She turned around, the bottom of her dress spun at her knees and for a moment there, Renji could see the happy glow in her violet eyes. Rukia always,  _always_  looked so at home in the human world. It pained him to know that she couldn't stay here like she used to.

Kyouraku- _soutaichou_  had assigned her back to Karakura when Kurotsuchi- _taichou_  confirmed the reopening of the  _senkaimon_. The head of the Gotei 13 reasoned that Rukia was the  _shinigami_  who was most familiar with the human world. Ukitake- _taichou_  used to handle that area, anyway. But the new captain of the 13th Division immediately submitted an appeal to have her posting swapped with someone else. Kyouraku then reassigned her to take charge of the 'rouge' shinigami. That post was originally Renji's. So now, he would be the one travelling to the world of the living – something he would've been more than thrilled to do ten years ago. But, not anymore.

"Where's Ichika?" she asked, panicking when she realised that her daughter wasn't with Renji.

"She's outside with Yoruichi- _san_ ," he replied.

Rukia heaved a sigh of relief. "I don't get why Yoruichi- _san_  insisted that I brought her. She's still a kid. The human world is such a crazy place. She also doesn't look like a human her age. And what's with that  _shinigami_  garb on her  _gigai_? Stupid Urahara. Couldn't he have gotten her a pair of jeans and a t-shirt instead?" she ranted.

"Alright, come on, Rukia," Renji grunted impatiently, as he pulled her by the elbow.

"Let go of me, idiot!" She tried to tug her arm out of his grasp but whenever they were in their  _gigai_ form, he would usually be the stronger one.

"No. If we don't leave now, we'll never get there. And if we don't get there, we'll never get it over and done with."  _And this anxiety about whether I'm going to have to carry your weeping ass back tonight is killing me._

They found Ichika playing on the floor with Yoruichi in her cat form at the compound of the  _shoten_. "Okay, Neko- _san_ , I think I have to go now," the girl giggled. She had quite a mature voice for a child who had the appearance of a five-year-old.

"Now, remember what I told you about humans, Ichi- _chan_ ," Yoruichi said when Ichika stood up. Rukia visibly flinched, both from hearing Yoruichi's male voice and the way her daughter was addressed. "They do not know about the  _shinigami_. They think it's a Japanese anime. So you're just cosplaying as one. I've also sent one costume to the little boy you will be seeing soon. So just pretend, okay? We don't want to scare them away."

Rukia furrowed her brows. "What are you talking about? Doesn't Ichigo's kid know his father is a  _shinigami_?"

Yoruichi decided to transform into a human. It was a good thing that Rukia's  _shunpo_  was much faster now. She could even do it in her  _gigai_. She managed to protect her daughter's eyes from seeing the flash Queen in her bloody naked form. Renji, however, couldn't turn away fast enough. With his face the colour of his hair, he started cursing, earning a glare from Rukia who was trying to cover Ichika's ears now.

"Ichigo doesn't tell the human kid about our world. He has been on  _reiatsu_  suppression himself since the child was born. So Kazui- _kun_  will not know a thing about  _shinigami_  and the Soul Society until he is 21. That's how long the suppression is set to last," Yoruichi explained, completely undeterred by her friends' discomfort about her state of nudity.

Keeping his eyes shut, Renji turned around and tossed a piece of cloak he found nearby at Yoruichi. "Cover yourself up, please!" he growled.

Yoruichi cackled as she wrapped the cloak around her body. "I didn't know you were such a prude like Ichigo, Abarai- _fukutaichou_. Seems to me that the both of you have much more in common than I thought," she goaded, smirking at Rukia.

The petite  _shinigami_  narrowed her eyes but chose not to say anything. A reaction would only encourage the cat lady to come up with more nonsense.

"We're going," she declared, taking Ichika with her.

Renji quickly fell in step with them. His patience was running low.  _Women, and their habit of wasting time_ , he thought.

"Remember to tell them you're a  _shinigami_  apprentice, Ichi- _chan_!" they heard Yoruichi yell as they walked out of the  _shoten_.

" _Shinigami_  apprentice," Renji mumbled. "What the fuck is a  _shinigami_  apprentice? It's either you're a  _shinigami_  or you're not."

Rukia tipped toe to slap her childhood friend behind the head. "Just go with it. And watch your language around the girl!"

"I've heard enough foul words to know what they are, mum," Ichika whined, as she tugged at her  _shihakusho_. Back at home, she would only wear a  _yukata_. There were fewer layers, which made it easier for her to climb trees. "How do people move around in these?"

Rukia snickered. " _Shunpo_ , my dear."

The girl rolled her eyes. "It figures.  _Shihakusho_  aren't for people who want to enjoy their lives filled with adventures."

"A  _shihakusho_  is for the  _shinigami_. And the job of a  _shinigami_  is to die protecting people, not prance around annoying others," Renji mocked.

Ichika pouted as she crossed her arm. "I do  _not_  prance around annoying people, Abarai- _fukutaichou_."

" _Otou-san_!" Rukia corrected before turning to Renji with her hands on her hips. "Why do you let her address you like that? It's disrespectful!"

Renji shrugged. "I don't think it's disrespectful. At least it comes with a proper honorific."

"She takes after your family name, Renji. She should address you accordingly," Rukia insisted.

The redhead only scoffed and continued walking. Karakura Town had not changed much in the last ten years. Everything they had passed by so far was familiar enough for them to remember how to get to the Kurosaki Clinic.

Ichika was walking a few paces ahead of them now. She was probably bored listening to the argument between the two adults. Renji always had something practical to say but mum would always counter with her uptight opinions and rigid rules which she had gotten from years of Kuchiki training. The sprightly young soul hated the Kuchiki clan. But she held a silent adoration for her artistically elegant uncle, Byakuya. Rukia always thought that she hung out at the 6th Division office because she wanted to spend time with Renji. How wrong she was. Ichika had her energetic moments and her quiet moments. It was during her quiet moments that she liked to be around Kuchiki Byakuya.

"You're alright there?" Renji nudged his elbow at Rukia's shoulder.

She sighed as she continued to stare at the back of her daughter's head. "I'm kind of nervous," she admitted, biting her lower lip.

"We don't have to do this, you know?" Renji halted his steps.

Rukia did the same. "Ichika, could you stop there for a while, please?"

The girl swayed about as she spun around to face them before taking a seat by the curb in her typical pre-teen behaviour. It looked suspiciously weird to the people walking by because she had the appearance of a kindergarten kid but the attitude of a rebellious teenager. And just like a teenager, she couldn't be bothered at all about what people thought.

Without really looking away from where Ichika was sitting, Rukia began, "We need to because Inoue invited us to their gathering. She heard about my promotion from Urahara. It would be impolite to decline. And rude to not show up."

"Impolite and rude are the same thing," Renji huffed as he shoved his hands into his pockets. Do you have a plan to beat this nervousness of yours?"

Rukia smirked. "I'll just act jovial."

"You suck at acting," Renji scoffed.

"I do not!" she cried. "We're two blocks away. I need you to walk first. I've got to psych myself up."

Renji shook his head.

"Oh, come on. I want him to feel your  _reiatsu_  first!"

"Didn't you hear what Yoruichi- _san_  said about his  _reiatsu_  suppression? He wouldn't know you're there even if you sneaked up on him."

Rukia pouted. "Then, could you hold my hand and act like, you know..."

"Hell, no!" Renji half-shouted, half-whispered. "That would be so out of character for us, you  _know_ that!"

"Are we done?" Ichika asked in a bored tone. "It's beginning to feel like we will never actually get there."

Renji sighed as he tugged at the hair-tie that was holding his braid. "Just act like your crazy self, alright? Let's go," he urged, clenching his teeth at the last two words.

As they approached the clinic, they caught sight of a little boy waving at them from Ichigo's bedroom window. He had orange hair and gentle brown eyes. That  _shinigami_  costume he had on over his hoodie was a dead giveaway to who he was. He probably recognised Ichika's costume as well, and that was why he was waving at them.

"Ichika," Rukia called. "See that boy over there? That's Kurosaki Kazui."

The girl looked up and scowled when she saw the small smiling face. "And that's the silliest grin I've ever seen."

"Abarai Ichika!" Rukia chastised, ignoring the chuckling baboon beside her. "You're going to put on your best behaviour. Look, he's still waving at you. I'll let you climb up that tree to his window. Just remember what Yoruichi- _san_  told you, alright?"

Ichika tilted her head at her mother as she raised a brow.

"Neko- _san_ ," Rukia offered.

"Oh." The little girl nodded in understanding. "I'll see you in the house later then," she said as she ran towards the tree closest to Ichigo's bedroom.

The two adults watched as she climbed up and was let inside the room by Kazui after they heard her introduce herself as a ' _shinigami_  apprentice'.

"Let's go," Renji prodded, pushing Rukia gently towards the house.

"I know, I know!" she hissed in annoyance. Taking a deep breath, she walked in front of Renji with her chin up.  _I can do this,_  she told herself, feeling confident as the light breeze caused her dress to sway with every step she made.

And then, the confidence plunged into her stomach when the glass door slid open.

"Yo!"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't know 686 was out until I read some of the fanfictions that carried remarks from their authors about how disappointed they were with the ending of BLEACH. I had a feeling that, aside from the unsatisfying ending to the war, the pairings were another issue the fans were unhappy about. So when I saw the boy with the gentle eyes (urgh… that's just so un-Ichigo), I put off tapping 'next' for a while. I was so afraid I would have a meltdown, a nervous breakdown, a cardiac arrest, or some kind of panic attack by the time I'd finished reading 686. The way I was writing this chapter was almost like that. I was actually scared for Rukia. I was terrified of their first meeting after ten years. That's how this chapter got so long. Well, longer than the ones before this, that is. I had been stalling.


	7. Chapter 6: Some things are better left unsaid (I)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seconds after "Yo!" (As depicted on 686 but with my background voice.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

Rukia could feel a huge lump in her throat. She mentally cursed Renji for not leading so she could hide behind him. She was definitely not ready for this. Ichigo looked so different. His hair was much shorter now and she briefly wondered if he did that to look more like a dad. She hoped that wasn't the case because he looked like a moron instead with that hairstyle. The Kurosaki Ichigo with the wild, notorious spikes, was gone. Even the orange was dull, pale, and basically dead. It lacked the glare of the sun and the blare of the horn that it used to have. And what's with that out-of-place smile? He should've kept the scowl.

She was thankful, though, that he didn't look quite like the old Ichigo. It made her feel less nervous. He no longer looked like the Ichigo who ran headlong with the folded chair towards the hollow when she first met him. He no longer looked like the Ichigo who stormed Soul Society to save her. He no longer looked like the Ichigo who defeated Aizen. He no longer looked like the Ichigo who destroyed Yhwach. And he definitely did not look like the Ichigo who put the ring on her finger.

But his voice was still Ichigo. She started to feel a crack within her. She needed to act fast before she broke apart. Crossing her arms over her chest to hold herself together, she greeted, "Hey!" A little too loud.

Renji flinched at the awkwardness in her voice as he was trying to figure out what to do; maybe contribute to the conversation or something. But before he could open his mouth, he heard her spout her first nonsense.

"Ooh, I see this place is just as popular as ever," she commented while standing at the doorway, looking around the clinic, anywhere but Ichigo. "Why, yup! I even hear some crickets inside."

"This is an emergency clinic. So being empty is a good thing," Ichigo said in defence before he looked over his shoulder, his eyes also meeting blank spaces. (Renji felt like strangling the two of them now.) "If you're done with the stand-up routine, feel free to come inside."

The two shinigami followed Ichigo into the house where their other human friends were gathered around the couch.

"Anyway, I guess now everyone is here," he announced, causing the ones who were there to turn away from the TV to look at the new arrivals.

Keigo, as usual, greeted Rukia with much enthusiasm and was just about to invite her to sit with him when he got socked in the face by Tatsuki. Mizuiro who sat closer to the screen, complimented her on her new hairstyle. It's funny how everyone was still like how they were in high school. Ten years and they were still acting like teenagers.  _So weird._  But at least she didn't have to learn to get used to new personalities. That would be an extra chore.

And speaking of new personalities...

"Out of the way! Coming through!"

"The popcorn and soda has finally arrived!"

Before she knew it, Rukia was pulled aside by Renji to make way for the twins who were definitely much bigger now, and so much taller than her. Of course, they would be bigger. They were already 23 years old. Heck, she even missed their teenage years! What kind of a third daughter was she to her 'Papa'? The twins spoke with her for a few moments after hugging her like crazy, sharing stories and updating her on their dating lives. It was just like old times – them seeking her advice as the older sister they never had while their brother steered clear of awkward topics.

Then, Karin got everyone to gather around the TV because Chad's fight was starting soon.  _Wow, Chad's a boxer_ , she thought.  _So he gets to punch people for fame and money_. She sure didn't see that coming. Tuning out the silly argument between Keigo, Mizuiro, and Tatsuki, she stared at the screen that was showing the face of the gentle giant. He looked... different. His eyes had that steely, emotionless feeling. No compassion at all. But then again, ten years was a long time. Anything could've happened. In Chad's case, maybe someone tore through his chest and ripped his heart out like what Grimmjow did to her.

"Hey, where's Ishida?" Renji asked, snapping her out of her trance.

Yuzu replied without looking away from the TV, "Ishida- _kun_  couldn't get off work but he said he will try to watch it from his phone at the hospital."

"Ishida's a doctor?" Rukia exclaimed unbelievably, a little too loudly once again. And once again, Renji flinched.

No one seemed to think that was a strange thing except Ichigo. The two of them glanced at each other. During the war, Ishida had told Ichigo that he didn't want to follow in his father's footsteps because he had witnessed horrifying stuff that Ryuuken did as a doctor. This topic came up during one of Ichigo and Rukia's pillow talks after their...  _Hmm, so only the two of us know about this_ , she mused.

What was supposed to be a glance, turned into a stare. Ichigo was the first one to snap out of it. He looked over his shoulder and called towards the kitchen, "It's starting, Orihime."

_Orihime..._

"Be right there!" came a very feminine voice.

Rukia turned around to see her busty old friend with long orange locks hurrying out of the kitchen. She looked so gorgeous and domesticated. The petite  _shinigami_  felt the pinch within her but she chose to cast the sweet girl her friendliest smile as she stood up to give her a hug. "In-... Kurosaki- _san_."

"Kuchiki- _san_!" Orihime returned the hug, squeezing the life out of Rukia. When they released each other, she said, "Please call me Orihime. We've been friends for so long."

Rukia nodded, keeping the smile on her face. She really couldn't find it in her heart to fault anything about this girl or the situation (tall, hot, orange) between them. If anything, Rukia felt more grateful to Orihime for being the one to live Ichigo's human life with him. "Only if you would call me Rukia."

They both talked for a while to catch up on each other's life. In order for her to keep it together while listening to Orihime's side of the story, Rukia resorted to acting again. This did not go unnoticed by Ichigo who could clearly see through it and he was trying really hard to not let his breakfast come back up his throat.

"You seen Kazui?" he asked, a little too forceful. He just wanted Rukia to stop talking with that annoying schoolgirl voice. The petite girl glared at him but he chose to ignore it, waiting for Orihime's reply.

The orange-haired woman turned her eyes upwards, recalling where she last saw the little boy. "Hmm... He should be upstairs. According to Tsubaki and the others, he just got back in from snooping around Hiyori's place."

Yuzu, who overheard the conversation, said she thought Kazui would most probably be in Ichigo's old room and then the three Kurosaki siblings went into some inside story conversation, which Rukia had no idea about and couldn't be bothered with, to be honest. But what piqued her interest was what Orihime had said about her flower powers.

"Tsubaki- _san_  and the others babysit for you?" Rukia asked.

"Babysit!" Orihime giggled. "I guess you could call it that. They help me watch him. It's a good thing he doesn't know they exist, though. Otherwise, he wouldn't be too happy because he likes to freely roam around on his own."

"So, your son really cannot sense spirits at all?"

" _Ano_..."

"Wait a sec," Ichigo interrupted. "Weren't you guys supposed to bring your kid along this time?"

Rukia rolled her eyes at his intrusion but answered him, "Ahh, that's right. It totally slipped my mind but she's finally become a Gotei apprentice. She's been given special permission to come down during the bon festival."

 _What bon festival?_  Ichigo wondered as he watched her walk towards the main door – to call out to her kid, he presumed. He already knew it was Yoruichi's idea to bring the soul kid to the human world.  _Why did Rukia choose to carry on acting like an idiot?_

"Hmm..." she said, coming back inside the house. "I guess she's gone."

That made Ichigo rise up from his seat to chastise her, "What's with that cavalier attitude?"

Rukia deliberately turned away from him. The way he yelled at her had evoked a sudden feeling of homesickness within her. "Don't worry. She's a  _shinigami_ ," she responded, pushing the lump in her throat farther down. "With mere humans as her opponents, she's sure to come out on top." And then, she started in her singsong voice, "Alright, ready or not, here I come to find you..."

Ichigo literally roared, "So she's some bully who enjoys picking on helpless humans?"

Renji was just standing there, arms crossed and foot tapping in irritation. It was like they were playing hide-and-seek with each other and using their verbal sparring as a distraction.  _These two are total arses,_  he thought.

"Go freaking find her, for crying out loud!"

One last howl from Ichigo was all Renji needed to set him off but he just grumbled under his breath, "I'll go get her," before he ran upstairs to Ichigo's old room.

The death and the strawberry continued their argument about things that didn't make sense, disregarding the other people who were present in the Kurosaki home. Ichigo was going on and on about how the midget never learnt about the dangers of the human world and Rukia was yelling at him for being a worrywart all the time, freaking out about the tiniest things. Neither of them knew if they were still talking about Ichika, though.

A hiss of  _reiatsu_  settled between them, causing them to cease their bickering. Even though Ichigo was not supposed to be able to feel anything anymore, he was sent into a trance that seemed to have lasted for hours, which in fact was only a couple of seconds to everybody else.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a reason why I completely ignored that part about Renji and Rukia still standing at the doorway when Ichigo asked them, "Weren't you guys supposed to bring your kid along this time?" I don't get why those two are still standing at the doorway after they have gone inside the house and Rukia has already spoken to Karin and Yuzu, and Karin has already told everyone Chad's show is starting. Also, what 'bon festival'? That part just does not connect with the other parts in this chapter, which only goes to show that 686 was either not properly planned or not something Kubo came up with wholeheartedly. That's just one flapdoodle thing in that bollocks chapter. There are others like (1) how Tatsuki isn't wearing the same top in the two panels she is in, and (2) Yuzu's out-of-character brother complex, and (3) only Mayuri, Byakuya, and Sui-Feng are there to investigate the return of Yhwach's reiatsu (the guy almost destroyed the whole universe – shouldn't every captain be involved in this?), and (4) Byakuya's nonchalance about his sister visiting the human world when something big is happening (shouldn't he be going all Kuchiki on her and telling her to come back to Seireitei immediately because her job is more important than her social life?), and why... never mind. I guess if I'm really going to dissect the entire chapter and look for all the faults within it, it would take a whole lifetime to write a full report.


	8. Chapter 7: Some things are better left unsaid (II)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The hiss of reiatsu…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

_"So, the final vestiges of Yhwach's power have at last disappeared."_

_"The path is being closed, Ichigo! The path to a world with no fear. The present world, Soul Society, and Hueco Mundo – they were meant to become one. Life and death, twisted and fused together. They were all destined to be one and the same._

_"But now, they will likely never happen. You have yourself to thank for that, Ichigo. Sadly, because of all your efforts here, life and death will never lose their current forms and all those who breathe will continue to pass each and every day by living in fear of death... for all eternity."_

_"Yhwach, you desired a world where fear would no longer be a burden. But in a world without fear of death, people will never attain the hope that is to be found from casting their fears aside and preserving through them. While it is true that people can continue to press forward through the simple act of living, that is in no way comparable to marching forward in the face of death, while doing their damnest to keep it at bay. That is why... That is why people have given that very march a unique and special name: Courage."_

"Kazui," Ichigo gasped as he blinked his eyes. The first thing he saw was a blob of black with two stunning violets calling his name repeatedly before it gave way to a head of orange with a worried face.

"Ichigo? Are you alright?" Orihime asked, placing her palm on his cheek.

"Kazui," he repeated before he shoved her aside and rushed up the stairs to his room, both Orihime and Rukia following closely behind.

When they arrived, they found the door to his old room wide open and there was Renji, sitting on the floor with Kazui and Ichika. They were playing a card game and the two kids were laughing at him every time the cards flew from his hands when he tried to shuffle.

They stopped laughing, however, when they noticed the three adults who had just appeared, watching them at the doorway. Renji looked back over his shoulder at his wartime comrades curiously. "Met your son, Ichigo," he said, breaking the silence. "He's definitely a nicer strawberry than you."

Ichigo scowled but disregarded Renji's teasing immediately. "Has he been here all these while?"

Renji furrowed his brows as he nodded.

"Anything... weird happened?"

The redhead  _shinigami_  shook his head, looking puzzled.

"Is there something wrong, Ichigo?" Orihime asked, touching his upper arm gently.

It took a while but Ichigo finally replied, still staring at Kazui who was looking back at him innocently. "Nothing's wrong. Just thought I..." he said, glancing to his other side at Rukia.

"What?" she asked, raising a brow.

Ichigo sighed as he shrugged. Orihime dropped her hand at his motion. She was concerned, but years of living with Ichigo taught her that even if there really were something bothering him, she would be the last person he would confide in. In the past ten years, Isshin had become the person he would always turn to. But now that the older Kurosaki was gone...

"Let's all go downstairs for dinner," Orihime uttered, inwardly sighing when no one seemed to be saying anything. "Yuzu- _chan_  has prepared some of your favourite dishes, Rukia- _san_. And you can try my very own strawberry shortcake for dessert."

Ichigo's eyes widened in horror as he followed Orihime down the stairs. Kicking him in the shin, Rukia glared at him. He was about to curse at her when Renji cleared his throat behind them.

"Erm... Not sure if you've noticed but there are kids around. Take it somewhere else, please," he gritted the last word between his teeth.

* * *

"I thought I saw Kazui's hand reaching out to this black hole or something when I passed out earlier," Ichigo told his former soul reaper partner.

They were sitting on the roof of the clinic, a bottle of Sapporo in hand. Orihime had excused herself to put Kazui to bed. The twins were playing video games with Ichika. They were quite fond of her as Karin found that the two of them had so much in common. Yuzu felt like she saw a little sister in the girl.

Mizuiro had left earlier with a drunken Keigo in tow. The latter was never good at drinking but he had wanted to show off to Rukia. Needless to say, the end result was not in his favour as he was picked up by both Renji And Ichigo, and thrown out of the house when he tried to squeeze into the love seat that Rukia was sitting in.

Tatsuki had gotten Renji to spar with her in the middle of the empty road in front of the clinic. She was a bit tipsy, that Renji knew. But he thought he'd give Rukia and Ichigo some time alone to catch up. They needed it. He knew there was really nothing they could both do to change whatever was going on in their lives now. But they still needed this moment, for old time's sake.

"I think what you saw was Yhwach's  _reiatsu_ ," Rukia commented.

Ichigo snapped his head to the side to face her. "How..."

"I saw it too. And I heard the voices – Aizen's and Yhwach's. I don't know how but I did," she said.

"Do you think it has something to do with how we used to share  _reiatsu_?" Ichigo mused aloud.

Rukia shrugged. "Who knows..."

"Are you going to find out?" he asked.

She released a sigh before taking a swig of her beer. She pondered upon the vision they both had. There was nothing they could do about it even if they did find out what it was all about. She knew, from years of experience as a  _shinigami_ , what researchers like Kurotsuchi and Urahara would probably say – that it had something to do with the string of fate or bullshit like that... which really, really means peanuts to them at this point of time. They were both 'married' to other people. It was best not to dwell upon anything that would complicate things. "Nah," she replied, shaking her head. "It's probably just the effects of his remaining  _reiatsu_  that caused us both to see the same thing. Who knows, maybe Uryuu, Chad, Orihime, and Renji did, too."

"No, they didn't," he disagreed, narrowing his eyes.

"How would you know? Did you ask Orihime?"

Ichigo gaped. "Well, did  _you_  ask Renji?"

"He was with the kids. They would've said something if he had gone into a trance like you did," she explained. Or at least she thought she was explaining.

"You weren't in a trance but you saw what I saw," he argued. "And that just proves my point that no one else saw what we did."

"That's different," she countered, not too sure what she was talking about anymore.

"You do realise we're just agreeing to disagree, right?"

That shut her up as she realised that he had caught her spout of nonsense. She just wanted to retaliate at everything he said. It felt familiar that way – like they were bickering as they always did – and it calmed her nerves.

"No, we're disagreeing to agree."

Ichigo huffed. He was beginning to wonder if she had deliberately come up to the rooftop to avoid talking to him. Either that, or she knew he would look for her here and she had been waiting to pick a fight with him. Kuchiki Rukia and her defiance against him.

"What is it?" he finally asked, getting tired of the cat-and-mouse game they were playing.

Shrugging again, she answered simply, "Nothing."

"Oh, come on. I know you're not one of those women with the hidden message dialogues," he urged.

Rukia sent him a glare. "How would you know if I wasn't one?"

"Because you were not like that ten years ago," he reminded.

"Well, ten years is a long time, Kurosaki. People change."

"Rukia," he almost growled. "If this is about… You  _told_  me to get married. You  _told_  me to live a normal life..."

"Yes, I did. And I'm glad you married Orihime. She's by far, the most wonderful woman in the world. I don't think you could've done better," she assured with a genuine smile.

Amber eyes gazed into her violet ones to read into the soul behind those enchanting orbs that still captured him like nothing else ever could. Ichigo understood what she was doing. Rukia did not want to talk about it – their past, that is. And whatever that had happened during his one-month stay at Soul Society before he came back to the human world... before they sealed the  _senkaimon_. She didn't want to talk about it because there was nothing they could do about it and bringing it up would only complicate things between them.

As miserable as he was going to be, he would have to respect her wish. She's married to Renji and they had a kid together. And he, too, was married – albeit 'for the wrong reasons', as his father had said – and he had a duty to fulfill as a husband and father.

Ichigo nodded slowly to show that he understood now, and Rukia's smile grew to show that she was grateful that he didn't press on. Their mind-reading connection came in handy at times like these. She was glad they were on the same page. So much had to be left unsaid but it was for the best at the moment.

After ten minutes of staring at the starlit sky above them in silence, Rukia got up to check on Ichika. She said it was time for them to leave anyway. Ichigo nodded and climbed down after her.

When Rukia went into the clinic to get Ichika, Ichigo found Renji standing at the lamppost across the street. The former  _shinigami_  took long slow strides towards his friend. They had not really spoken much to each other that evening.

"Tatsuki told me about it," Renji said when Ichigo was within earshot.

The other man shoved his hands into his pockets, his jaw clenched as he glanced up at the sky before making eye contact with Renji. "How much did she tell you?"

"That Kazui isn't your son and the reason why you married Inoue was to take care of them."

Ichigo nodded, despite feeling annoyed with Tatsuki's inability to keep her mouth shut. He sighed, "Yeah."

"So have you told Rukia?" Renji asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

The shorter man shook his head and Renji understood that as, 'No, I haven't and please don't mention it to her yet.' He could see the same stubbornness in Ichigo that he always saw in Rukia. It frustrated him but as a third person, he couldn't do anything about it. The two idiots would someday realise that the walls they had been building to protect themselves and each other would eventually collapse. And that's going to be one hell of a fixing to do.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned before, this fic is a redemption fic for 686. I'm just filling in the gaps and hoping to give a better future to our OTP while at it. The 'ten year after Yhwach' flashback is over. So we will go back to after Inoue's death in the next chapter.


	9. Chapter 8: Everyone has a secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back to after Rukia discovers who Kazui is - or isn't.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…
> 
> My end notes contain some of my replies to the questions from my FFnet readers about the previous chapter(s) while I was in the process of writing this fic. So they may seem pretty out of context to you, where this chapter is concerned. They are after the ---.

 

_"But you are not my father!"_

_Rukia covered her mouth as she gasped in shock. She snapped her eyes towards Renji who was looking back at her, biting his lower lip anxiously. She furrowed her brows, her face full of questions. Before she could verbalise them, the door slammed open as Kazui stormed out of the house with his luggage. When he realised they had guests outside their home, his steps halted for a while as he threw glances at the two people standing awkwardly at his doorstep._

_"_ _Kazui..." Rukia reached her hand out to him._

_The human boy she had seen growing up to be this man before her glared at her for a few seconds too long before he left, seemingly angrier than he was when he was having the argument with Ichigo._

Hands on his knees, Renji inhales deeply as he tried to catch his breath. This was easily the most exhausting sparring sessions in his entire life.  _Doesn't look like we're just sparring anymore,_  he thought, staring ahead at his short friend.  _Feels like she's trying to kill me. Damn you, Ichigo._

His eyes widened when Rukia took on a fighting stance, ready to charge at him. It was kind of scary, that look she had on her face. For the fifth time since they had started, he wondered if it was really Byakuya with some disillusionment  _kido_  he was up against. The only expression she had was utter disgust.

Picking up his katana, he lifted his free hand in front him to indicate that he had had enough. His  _shihakusho_  was more or less in tatters now. "Rukia, please. I've said it like a zillion times. I'm sorry. Ichigo only wanted you to hear it from..."

" _Mae_ , Sode no Shirayuki!"

"Shit!" Renji cried before releasing his  _shikai_. " _Hoero_ , Zabimaru!"

The temperature in the training ground of the 13th Division plunged way below what he could handle. He shivered visibly even as his  _zanpakutou_  extended to swipe away at ice flakes that were coming at him. There were icicles forming at the tips of his segmented sword immediately. Not good.

" _Some no mai_ , Tsukishiro!" Rukia circles her sword before her, the cold of her surrounding having no effect on her.

"Rukia!" Renji shouted as he  _shunpo_  away from her targeted area.

She still refused to speak a word to him. Placing the ball of her right foot in front of her left, she pivoted with Sode no Shirayuki held horizontally across her face before she struck the end of the sword up towards where Renji was hanging in the air.

He barely managed to swing Zabimaru to slice the laser ice aimed at his chest. You'd think she would be done with two hours of swords play by now. She never released her  _shikai_  at him unless they were training for a mission. Today was supposed to be basic swing-and-parry  _zanjutsu_  training.

In a quick motion Rukia  _shunpo_  towards the redhead, both hands gripping the hilt of her sword above her head to stabilise it against the artificial snowy blizzard she had created. Her foot lightly touched the flat surface of his sword to give her a boost in his direction. She was about to slice her sword downwards when her limps died on her and she found herself free-falling, scarcely missing Zabimaru on her way down before she landed in a pair of frozen arms.

Recovering from her astonishment, she found herself glaring at the teal eyes of the  _taichou_  of the 10th Division, Hitsugaya Toushiro. The kid captain, however, looked back at her coolly.

With the grace of the dancer that she was, she swung one leg over the other to get off of his hold before pushing away from him. Still glaring. "This is a private training session, Hitsugaya- _taichou_ ," she said, her voice calm and low, and not betraying her rage.

"I am aware of that, Kuchiki- _taichou_. But you were freezing the barracks of the Gotei 13 and I was sent to stop you because I am the only one who can incapacitate you at this temperature," he explained.

Rukia looked around her before hesitantly meeting those teal eyes again. "Thanks," she mumbled with a small bow.

Hitsugaya nodded and then, he was gone from their sight. The ice began to thaw – too agonisingly slow for Renji who was frozen stiff on the ground.

Rukia knelt down next to him to cast a healing  _kido_  upon him in silence. She was apologising – in her Kuchiki way – for almost killing him, but she couldn't find it in herself to forgive him for keeping her in the dark about Kazui. Wasn't he supposed to be her best friend? Whose side was he on?

"Look," he began when he felt he had gained a bit of energy to speak. "Ichigo thought it would be better for him to reveal this to you after he has passed on. I got to know it by accident when Arisawa blurted it out the first time we visited them after the  _senkaimon_  was unsealed."

A surge of heat coursed through his wounds and he winced quietly in pain. Rukia's jaw clenched. She did not trust herself to speak or she would surely say something that would hurt him even more.

"You know what?" he coughed. "These past decades have been a torture for me to keep your secrets from each other. You are both my close friends. I couldn't tell you about Kazui for the same reason I can't tell him about Ichika. Now that you know his secret, I think it's time he knows yours."

"You may go," Rukia croaked before she  _shunpo_  to her captain's quarters. She felt bad for leaving Renji like that. He had been so supportive of her all these years, even letting Ichika have his family name when the elders threatened to do away with the baby. She would make it up to him some day but at the moment, she couldn't even reconcile with herself.

Renji sighed. For the first time in over forty years, he felt relieved that he would be going back to Karakura the next day for his monthly patrol. He hadn't been spending much time there since Ichigo's  _reiatsu_  suppression was lifted some 20 years ago.  _At least I'll be away from Rukia's wrath for a while._  But he knew Rukia was mad, not so much because she wasn't told about Kazui's background, but rather that she had practically given Ichigo a reason to keep it from her.

* * *

Rukia arrived at her quarters to find Ichika sprawled on her stomach across the couch in her orange sweatpants and black tank top. Her wavy, golden brown hair, which covered her face like a curtain parted at her back to reveal the tattoo of a black flame just at the nape of her neck, the  _kanji_  for her  _zanpakutou_  – Kuroi Honoo – written just below it.

"You're back," Rukia stated, placing her  _zanpakutou_  on the stand in one corner of the living area.

The girl nodded as she said something, which was muffled by the couch. Her mother grunted in reply, already very used to her daughter's perpetual teenage behaviour. Kind of reminded her of...

Rukia shook her head to make the thought disappear. "How was your trip to Hueco Mundo?" she asked.

Ichika took her time to sit up and gave her mother some space on the couch. "49 kills. All new-breed Adjuchas," she answered smugly.

The captain smirked. Her daughter had always been boastful of her wipeouts. She had warned her about being too confident but so far, Ichika had been careful enough to not get herself trashed too badly on the battlefield. Rukia wasn't worried about her most of the time. After all, she did inherit her father's fighting spirit. "So are you ready to take up that  _fukutaichou_  post? You only have a month to go."

"Of course! Sui-Feng- _taichou_  has given me that one-month's leave before the installation. I'm thinking of dropping by the human world to hang out with Kazui," she said, getting excited about her plans.

Rukia furrowed her brows. It was now or never. She had to tell Ichika the truth.  _The Elders are not going to like this,_  she thought.  _Let's hope Nii-sama would understand, though._  "Ichika, let's spend the weekend together at the summer house in the 2nd District. We could go now since I'm taking a few days off as well."

Ichika beamed at her mother. It had been too long since they last spent time with each other. To her, Rukia was the coolest mother anyone could ever asked for – not that she knew anyone else who had a mother, except for Kazui. Her friends were mostly people who came from Rukongai before signing up at the Shinō Academy. They did not have parents because they just appeared there after dying in the human world. And souls do not breed. In Soul Society, anyone could get married but only the nobles are able to have children. She was lucky that her mother was from a noble family, even though she always wondered how her mother could conceive her since she was adopted into the Kuchiki clan.

An hour later, they arrived at her uncle's summerhouse, which was located in a 2nd District village, miles away from town. It was probably only her third or fourth time there in her 46 years of life. No one really used this place but she knew her mother came down here at least twice a year to unwind from her hectic life as a  _taichou_.

"Ichika," Rukia started. They were both sitting at the patio, having a drink from juice boxes Renji brought back from the human world every time he went on a patrol there. He knew how much Rukia liked those sweet drinks, especially the strawberry flavoured ones. "There is something I need to tell you before you see Kazui."

Ichika moved her rattan chair closer to Rukia's to give her mother her full attention. "What is it,  _Kaa-san_?"

"Ichika, Kazui isn't Kurosaki- _san_ 's child," Rukia paused, gazing at her daughter's sapphire eyes. "You are."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha... I just had to add Hitsugaya into this chapter. Wish I could put him and Karin together but let's not get sidetracked from the main pairing. Lol! After all, the goal of this fic is to mend the holes, tie up loose ends, and trim the edges of the ribbons so they don't fray again. Oh, and Ichika's zanpakutou, Kuroi Honoo, means 'black flame'.
> 
> \--- 
> 
> With regards to how Kazui feels about Ichigo: from his point of view, Ichigo would be the biggest asshole in the world for marrying his mother out of sympathy (and convenience, though he doesn't really know that). The Ichigo we are all familiar with isn't pretentious so it is only expected that his relationship with Orihime remains at the level of friendship where one cares for the other with no intimacy even though they are married. It's exactly what we see in Chapter 686. I must say, Kubo-sensei is a brilliant artist who penned the expressions so well to show that there's really nothing going on between Ichigo and Orihime except for a gentle-eyed child. All hail the King of Trolls! Haha...
> 
> Not going to dwell too much on how Kazui does not have an ounce of Ichigo in him except for the colour of the hair and eyes. It's like he was painted with Ichigo's shades but he has none of Ichigo's vibrancy, his spirit. That's the reason why he is Orihime's son in this fic and not Ichigo's. Gentle = Orihime. Brash = Ichigo. If there's anything a child could inherit from their father, it's definitely his spirit. 
> 
> Renji, even in the manga, has always known where he stands with Rukia. He has deep feelings for her but he knows he is not the man for her. And so he accepts his role as a protective brother to her. In fact, he's more of an older brother to her than Byakuya ever was. 
> 
> I shamelessly included my thoughts on the parts that didn't make sense to me. Chad being a boxer, Uryuu a doctor, the wild trio still acting like teenagers even though they are supposed to be nearing their thirties, Yuzu's weird sibling complex that I just cannot stomach so I left it at them Kurosakis going 'into some inside story conversation, which Rukia had no idea about and couldn't be bothered with, to be honest', also about Rukia's lack of confidence and not meeting-the-eye behaviour when she met Ichigo. Yes, it was painful for me to do it but I studied that chapter at all angles.
> 
> Rukia would fight blood and sweat to achieve her dreams but not at the expense of others. In my fic, if she had known that the senkaimon would open sooner, she would probably have just told Ichigo to wait it out but they thought it would take a hundred years which is slightly more than a human lifetime (if you've read Don't say goodbye), so she wanted him to have his normal life back because there was really no need for him to practise being a shinigami anyway. The only regret she has is that their future was so uncertain to them before the humans came back to the world of the living. Of course, she knew that it was too late to change anything when they got back ten years later and found out that both of them were already married to other people. That's the reason why she refused to say anything that would complicate things at the rooftop.
> 
> I'm not going to touch on Orihime because it would give away too much and spoil the rest of the fic. But you will see later on, how big a role she plays in this. At the end of the day, I think this fic is more about Rukia's friendship with Orihime... on Rukia's end, that is. Ichigo's side of the story is heavily based on him doing the right thing following the choice he made... and not screwing up, as his father had advised him. 
> 
> The children... Hahaha... The children were doomed the minute they appeared on 686. To me, they don't exist in the manga. I've said this on my tumblr and I will say this again: Bleach is not Naruto. It does not need progenies. So the children were a waste of panels. Bleach is about soul balancing. It's about soul reapers performing konso on plusses, purifying hollows, dying while protecting friends and families, not procreating – that's for humans. We don't breed shinigami. We recruit reiatsu-buzzing souls from the Rukongai and train them in the Shinō Academy. Only the nobles are able to procreate. So I seriously don't see the significance of Kazui or Ichika other than a sequel-in-the-making to Bleach which will probably try to make up for the lost connection between the ORIGINAL Death and the Strawberry. Once again, no... Bleach does not work that way. Kubo-sensei could've just ended it with both Rukia and Ichigo standing at the senkaimon in their shihakusho, overlooking the human world, with the Seireitei behind them. Don't even need to fucking marry them. Lol! Leave the pairing to the fans. That's what fan fictions and fan arts are for, aren't they? 686 was the worst ending ever for a shounen manga because the hero ended up with the unfulfilling life he hated. 


	10. Chapter 9: The fruit of the bond

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichika's history

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

Kuchiki Byakuya was getting concerned about his sister's state of health. Ever since the  _ryoka_  had gone back to the human world three months ago, Rukia had shown signs of depression. She seemed to have reverted to her old self during those 17 months when Kurosaki Ichigo lost his  _shinigami_  powers. This time, though, it looked worse than before. As much as he despised the uncouth human, Byakuya knew that Kurosaki was an important person in his sister's life. Perhaps, the most important person even.

He couldn't really blame Rukia for being more upset this time because the  _soutaichou_  had issued a decree for the sealing of the  _senkaimon_  until such time when Yhwach's  _reiatsu_  disappeared for good. Based on the knowledge of the 12th Division, it would take almost a hundred years before that could happen. They were still trying to find a way to accelerate the dissolution of the  _reiatsu_  but things did not look very promising for them. On top of that, the Soul Society was still in ruins.

During the first weeks after the humans had gone back, Rukia was still able to get herself together to sort out the office of the 13th Division. Byakuya supposed reality must have hit her like a bomb after a while because she started to frequently skip meals and keep herself locked up in her room. Tonight, he would check on her. The last time he had seen her was a week ago. That night she was present at dinner with him but had rushed off without properly excusing herself when the first dish was served.

Byakuya tapped his knuckles on Rukia's  _shoji_  door twice while releasing a bit of his  _reiatsu_  to let her know it was him. He tried again a few more times when she didn't respond. He could sense her presence in the room but her spiritual pressure was weak. He wasn't sure if she was asleep or...

"Rukia," he called. "I'm coming in." He gently slid the door open and that's when he heard the sound of her retching in the bathroom.

* * *

The Elders were all gathered at the Kuchiki hall, looking at Rukia with disdain. She was seated next her brother, head bowed in guilt for having caused Byakuya the embarrassment. She was in her second trimester but still barely showing. If it weren't for the gossiping servants, the Elders would not have come to know of her pregnancy.

Now that Rukia had recovered from her morning sickness, she was getting better at keeping the food down but she was still constantly fatigued by her condition.  _Shinigami_  work had been kept to a minimum. There wasn't much they could do while waiting for the repairs to be done, anyway. Kotetsu- _san_  had asked for a transfer to the Fourth Division to assist her sister who was running the whole office on her own following the death of Unohana- _taichou_. But Sentarou- _san_  had been a great help to Rukia and while he did notice how tired she always was, he never asked.

Here at the clan meeting, Rukia's head was just reeling in anxiety. All she wanted to do was crawl into her futon for a good long sleep. She couldn't even be bothered with what the Elders were talking about. It felt like she was floating away.

"I don't see a problem here since the man who caused this disgrace is not here anymore. We can still terminate the pregnancy," said one of them.

"No," Byakuya objected. "This child is Rukia's. I will not have it killed just because the father is absent."

"Byakuya, you can't possibly allow her to carry on with this. It is not a legitimate child. The news about her pregnancy will travel fast. The clan's reputation is at stake here. We are going to be the laughing stock of the other clans once again. Are you willing to bear that burden of being the one to cause it? Again? You know what they are going to say: Byakuya's adopted street rat sister..."

"Enough! She will keep the child. And if it's only your face you're worried about, I will send her to stay at the 2nd District until it is comfortable enough for her to come back to the Seireitei."

"You don't understand, do you? Our concern is that there will be a child out of wedlock within the clan. Our  _noble_  clan. We cannot have that. Or we will have to renounce her..."

"Then, I will see to it that the child does not bear the Kuchiki name," Byakuya barked. He knew they would use this as a way to disown Rukia but he wouldn't have that. Not because he made a promise to Hisana, but because he had come to accept and appreciate Rukia as his own sister.

There was a contemptuous silence in the hall as everyone stared at the rebel clan leader. For the umpteenth time, Kuchiki Byakuya was giving the Elders a huge headache. They could never understand why it was always so hard for him to abide by the rules of the clan.

"Very well," came the voice of one very old Elder who was sitting right across from where Rukia was. "She may keep it but on our terms."

Byakuya grunted in irritation. "And what are the terms?"

"She may keep the pregnancy," the old lady repeated. "And you may keep her in the clan. But no one must know who the father is, including the child. We don't want word to get out that a potential Kuchiki heir has had a promiscuous relationship before marriage. And as you have said earlier, the child will not bear the Kuchiki name. Find a surrogate father for the child who will then, take after his family name."

Rukia, who had kept her head bowed throughout the discussion, swallowed her tears of sorrow and guilt. Sorrow for her rejected child, and guilt for her discriminated brother. But she would never let them take the child away from her. It may have looked like a licentious affair to the Elders but to her, the memory of the covenant  _he_  made with her stayed bright and true. And the child was the fruit of that covenant.

* * *

" _Taichou_ ," Renji gasped, skimming through the contents of the scroll that Byakuya had assigned him to deliver. "What's the meaning of this?"

Byakuya looked up from the document he was perusing. "I believe that scroll is strictly confidential, Abarai. Deliver the message as I have instructed. You are to tell no one about it," he ordered.

Renji scrunched up his brows. Normally, he would not dare to defy his superior with the killer  _sakura_  petals but this concerned his childhood friend. "I'm sorry,  _taichou_. But I can't let you marry Rukia off to a random stranger. Does she even know about this?"

The raven-haired captain sighed. Of course, his  _fukutaichou_  would react badly to this. Rukia was Renji's only family. As much as Byakuya would like to admonish his objection – which he had no right to, considering that the redhead had nothing to do with the Kuchiki clan matters, he also had had enough of the disputes and contention with regards to Rukia's pregnancy. Just once, he would like to have at least one party accepting it with an open heart, and he knew Renji would be one such party. So, he proceeded to tell his  _fukutaichou_  about Rukia's situation.

By the time Byakuya had finished explaining, Renji was understandably pissed off, especially at the way the Kuchiki clan was handling it. For a minute there, he was also furious at Ichigo for leaving Rukia to bear the responsibility of their child on her own. But he knew deep within, had the brash young man known about the child, he would have fought Soul Society with everything he had left after the war to come back here to be with Rukia.

However, after all these, the last emotion he had was hurt. Hurt, because Rukia did not have the confidence in him to tell him about it. He would have tried to protect her before it got to the clan. But then again, whom was he kidding? Protecting Rukia was never his destined purpose in life. That was Kurosaki Ichigo's. And the bastard was not around. Renji could only provide her the support that she needed. It had always been like that.

"I'll do it," he finally spoke up long after Byakuya allowed him the time to let the information sink in.

The  _taichou_  of the Sixth Division stared back at him in shock. Renji had never looked so determined in all his time working for him. "You will do what?"

Renji cleared his throat. "I'll be the surrogate father to the child. You don't have to look elsewhere and you sure as hell don't have to pay me," he said, his finger pointing accusatively at the scroll, which was laid out on the  _taichou_ 's table.

For the first time, Byakuya was speechless.  _But I should have seen this coming. Abarai's feelings for Rukia had always been so obvious_ , he thought.

"You... you don't have to pay me,  _taichou_. I would do it for Rukia in a heartbeat if you had told me first."

Byakuya's expression softened, as he turned his gaze away from Renji. "Very well," he said, nodding uncertainly. "But I will need to speak to Rukia to see if she agrees to this. You will have to be engaged before she is sent to the summerhouse, where she will stay until she delivers and maybe even a couple of years after that."

* * *

A simple  _yuinou_  was held for Renji and Rukia during the weekend before she made the one-hour journey to her 'hideout' – as she had called it. She hated that it looked like an act of cowardice, an act of shame, that she had to isolate herself and her child from everybody when, truth be told, she was actually very proud to be bearing it.

She and Renji hadn't spoken much about their union. There was a silent agreement – and Renji himself had expected it – that their relationship would not change and the engagement was just a formal ritual that the child would be named after him. Of course, she was grateful that her childhood best friend would sacrifice his marital status for her. But she couldn't return his feelings for him at the moment or promise him that she would, in the future. That would be a cruel lie.

Besides, Renji could tell where her heart lay. He didn't want to start hoping that she would change her mind someday. Because he knew, that even if Ichigo and Rukia couldn't be together now, their string of fate would somehow link them together again one fine day in the future. And when that day comes, their lost bond would be forged again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here's how Ichika came about. Let me explain why I always see Ichika as Ichigo's kid. In 686, Ichika is never coloured. There's no proof at all that she has Renji's red hair. I compared the grey shade of her hair to all the others' and found it to be similar to Yuzu's and Masaki's in some panels. Yes... Hahaha... A grey shade is a very generic colour in a black and white page of a manga. But come on, it helps me sleep at night. Lol!
> 
> \--- An answer to a reader's question again. Can't remember what exactly it was.
> 
> Kazui being a shinigami: erm... again, I think I've mentioned this before in one of my previous chapters. He's not a shinigami. There are no kid shinigami. Shinigami are trained when they enter the Shinō Academy. So in my fic – because of how incredulous I think kid shinigami are – Kazui was only cosplaying as a death god. The costume was given by Yoruichi who must've told him stories about shinigami anime and manga and such. Even Ichika hated the outfit when she's younger because she felt it restricted her movements. By the way, if you go back to 686, you'd see that Kazui is wearing the shihakusho over a hoodie. It looks really, really weird. So I don't think he's a shinigami at all. A shinigami purifies hollows, there's blood and gore involved. Even if I were a shinigami myself, I would still want to preserve my kid's innocence for as long as possible until such time when he is ready to enter the Academy. 
> 
> Yes, I agree with you that Bleach should have ended when the Arrancar Arc ended. Kubo should've just left it at Ichigo losing his shinigami powers but at the same time showed that he missed it and craved for it to be back. THEN, and only then can Studio Pierrot expand into Bleach movies like what Marvel and DC do with their comics. 
> 
> Again, thanks for all your reviews. I've replied personally to the others... I hope. Haha. If I haven't, please PM me to remind me. Next chapter, we'll explore Renji and Rukia's relationship after they returned from their first visit to Karakura when the senkaimon first opened again after the war. We'll also see a Rukia-Kazui interaction.


	11. Chapter 10: A broken home, a broken child

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Rukia tells Ichika about how she came about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

Rukia sat beside her daughter quietly at the patio. Ichika had not spoken a word after listening to her mother's confession about whom her biological father was. The girl would need a bit of time to digest this new information, no doubt. To be told that that Kurosaki- _san_  – her mother's good friend from the human world – whom she visited once a year was her real father... it was a lot for her to take. Rukia decided to give her daughter a moment to herself.

_Fate is a cruel thing_ , the captain of the 13th Division thought. Forty-seven years ago, when Yhwach was finally defeated, she and Ichigo thought they could finally be together. They had fought alongside each other since she transferred her  _shinigami_  powers to him when he was 15. He was still such a young boy then. But he understood his role as one to protect even at that age. In between patrolling, school, and trying to adapt to the world of the humans, Rukia's feelings for Ichigo grew beyond student and mentor. She knew those feelings were wrong. He was a human and she was a  _shinigami_. He would grow up and get older, and she would most probably remain the same as she watched him age. They were two worlds apart. So she kept her feelings to herself.

As time passed, they would share accidental glances, longing stares, and very subtle flirty smirks, but those were the only gestures they would both allow themselves to convey unspoken messages. They were both too busy saving every corner of the universe to let anything happen.

Despite that, something  _did_  happen after Yhwach. They shared a month of blissful happiness before their little world came crashing down and they had to painfully part ways. He had planned on proposing to her before he went back to the world of the living. He even asked his father to take him to the Rukongai to pick out a ring for Rukia. And although he found out they were probably going to be separated for a human lifetime, he proposed anyway.

_"_ _If fate was on our side, would you have married me, Rukia?"_

Of course, she had said 'yes'. She loved him, and she knew he had loved her, too. They never had to say those exact words out loud. Their communication had always been through eye contact and actions.

Fate  _was_  a cruel thing. It led them to meet each other again much earlier than expected but much too late for them to change anything. They both couldn't keep up with the speed of the world without each other. So they ended up just gliding through time, trying to make the best out of what they had.

Rukia tried  _to make the best out of_  the engagement she had with Renji. When they got back from that first visit to the human world after the  _senkaimon_  reopened, she told Renji she wanted to give their relationship a try. Even though Ichika was already 10 years old at that time, they were not officially married. They never talked about it, assuming that the engagement was still just a formality so Ichika could take after Renji's family name.

Renji was uncertain but he decided to do as she asked. They started to go out on dates, without Ichika being the third wheel. They'd go to festivals at the Rukongai. They would spend lunchtime together almost every day. They would have dinner almost every night at the Kuchiki manor with Byakuya. They would even hold hands and steal awkward kisses when no one was looking.

It went on for two years.  _Exactly_  two years because they were out at one of the finer dining places at the First District, kind of celebrating whatever they had together. Rukia had expected Renji to propose that night. She thought their relationship had progressed significantly enough for them to take it to another level. She had expected him to pull out a ring just like what Ichigo did twelve years ago.

But Renji took her hand in his and told her that those two years were definitely the happiest years of his life, and he thanked her for that. He thanked her for trying and for giving him the opportunity to date her. A thousand questions whirled around her head. Because, why would he say things like that if he was going to propose to her?

And then, it dawned on her that he was breaking up with her because...

_"You and I both know you're still in love with the orange-haired idiot and nothing I do will ever make you look at me the way you always looked at him."_

Rukia had hid it really well with her Kuchiki mask, or so she thought. She was still trying to get over Ichigo. She really wanted to. While she was doing it, though, sometimes it still hit her really hard that she had let him go that morning when the humans returned to their world. That she had pushed him to live a normal life. That she had told him to move on. And when she found out that he did, all she felt was bitterness against herself, for herself and Ichika, and sometimes a little bit towards him as well. She supposed it did show, maybe not obvious to people who were not close to her. But to Renji who knew her so well, it was probably clear as day.

Before they left the diner, she had agreed to the breakup and vowed to completely get over Ichigo as she  _had_  to move on sooner or later. Renji only smiled and shook his head.

"So what are you going to do, Mum?" Ichika's voice took her out of her reverie. She gave her daughter a small smile and thought about how much alike she was to her father – always thinking about someone else before her. She should be more concerned about herself because she just found out who her real father was.

Rukia shrugged. "I don't know. I've been meaning to talk to Kazui since his mother's funeral. But I never got the chance to. Now, with this new discovery, I'm not sure what I'm going to say to him anymore."

"What about..." Ichika hesitated. "Kurosaki- _san_?"

"Nothing," her mother replied immediately. "Nothing's going to change. We've lived almost 50 years like this. The only difference is how it's going to be between us and Kazui."

"You don't think Kurosaki- _san_  still harbours..." Ichika pondered out loud but she was interrupted by her mother.

"Ichika, we both decided to move on and we did. There's no point in bringing up the past."

* * *

The three-hour ride from Karakura to Nagoya on the train felt like it was over too soon. On the way there, scenes of how Kazui would possibly react to her visit played in her head. The worst one would be if he wouldn't even want to see her because she had eavesdropped upon his fight with Ichigo. There were several times during the ride when she wanted to change her mind but it would be a total waste of time for the 13th Division captain if she did. It would have to be done sooner or later, anyway. Rukia had picked up her  _gigai_  at Karakura before making her journey to visit Kazui.

Upon arrival at his apartment, Rukia hesitated before she knocked on his door. She had been given the address by Tatsuki. The  _kendoka_  was the only connection she had to Kazui as the latter had refused to speak with Ichigo for two months now since the fight. In fact, neither had Rukia.

"Rukia- _obasan_?" Kazui greeted in surprise.

_If only he were Ichigo's son, he would've sensed my presence_ , Rukia thought with a bit of regret. "Hello, Kazui."

"What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you. May I come in?" she asked.

Kazui nodded mechanically as he stepped aside for Rukia to enter his apartment. The raven-haired woman walked in slowly, taking a quick glance around the living space of her friends' son. It looked like a young man's place despite the fact that Kazui wasn't that young anymore. But then again, he was not married, so she couldn't expect to find the place furnished like a family home.

Ten minutes later, they were seated across from each other at the dining table, two cups of tea and an awkward silence between them. Rukia's intention for her visit was to see how Kazui was doing after the death of his mother. He had always been very close to her, just like how Ichigo was with his own. Rukia had no memory of what losing a parent was like but she remembered what their friends said about how Ichigo had coped with life after his mother's death. For Kazui, Orihime's death must've been even worse than what Ichigo had experienced, especially – as Rukia had found out – since Orihime was his only real family.

"How are you doing, Kazui?" Rukia asked, breaking the silence.

The orange-haired man continued to stare into his tea for a good minute before shrugging. "I'm getting by," he answered.

It was noticeable now how different he was from Ichigo. While he did have the orange hair and brown eyes, his features were much, much gentler. He did not have Ichigo's perpetual scowl or the blank out expression the latter wore after coming back from the war, but Kazui's eyes did bear the look of one who was sad, confused, and affected by what life had brought him. It was like he was one of those who always lamented that life was unfair.

"I'm sorry," she said.  _For your loss, for your grief, for your devastation. For the grievances, the unfairness, the bitterness in your life._

Kazui nodded, his hands wrapped loosely around his teacup. "It's okay. It's been almost four months now. I'm learning to cope. I'm sorry I stormed out on you and Renji- _ojisan_  that day. It wasn't you I was upset with. I was just really pissed off that  _Otou-san_  always seemed to prioritise his  _shinigami_  work over us.

"Ever since they told me about your bizarre world and he had gotten back his powers, he was always busy hollow-hunting or sending souls away. I have always known he wasn't my real father. I was 12 when I got them to confirm my suspicions and I'm grateful that he took us in to take care of us. I get that he didn't have the obligation to be a father to me but the least he could do was spend more time with  _Okaa-san_. From my end, it felt like your world had robbed us off him when I was 21. Although  _Okaa-san_  told me it was, in fact, otherwise. But that's beside the point, isn't it? He chose to marry my mother," Kazui ranted.

Rukia wasn't surprised at all that Ichigo would be stupid enough to go overboard with his soul-reaping. But she was dismayed that he made his family feel neglected. Knowing him, she was pretty certain he hadn't done it intentionally. He probably didn't realise it, getting carried away by something he had always prided himself in doing – protecting a whole truckload of people.

The thing that troubled Rukia now was that Kazui didn't know about who Ichika was to Ichigo. If this was how he felt about his father's  _shinigami_  life, she couldn't imagine how furious he would get when he found out. Granted, Ichigo himself didn't know about it but she was positive Kazui would suspect his father's distancing himself probably had something to do with not just an old life, but an old flame as well.

This realisation made her uncomfortable all of a sudden. She wanted to get it over with.  _Just hate me already but I can't bear for you to be left in the dark about yet another secret,_ she mentally told him. But then, she realised that she can't tell Kazui without first telling Ichigo. And anyhow, Ichigo should be the one to tell Kazui, if anyone was to do it.

How the hell had life become so complicated for them? Is this a punishment or something for taking down Yhwach?

_"_ _Change it, and I shall chop down any fate you try to carve out for yourself."_

Ichigo had told Rukia what Yhwach lectured him about during their battle. Was this what the Quincy King meant? That Ichigo would live a discontented life if he went against Yhwach? That he would never get the best of both worlds?

"Kazui, I'm so sorry you felt that way about your father. I'm so sorry our world got in the way of your family. It is understandable that you cannot accept his other life. But I hope you will forgive him for his negligence and maybe give him a chance to make it up to you," Rukia finally spoke up.

For the first time, Kazui smiled at her again. He used to do that a lot when he was a child. But she had not seen that in a long time. "Rukia- _obasan_ , I'm no longer a little boy who needs his father's attention. I don't need him to make it up to me. And now, that  _Okaa-san_  is no longer around, it is fine that  _Otou-san_  does whatever he pleases with his life. I do, however, want to look for my biological father. And that is something  _Otou-san_  disagrees with. We fought many times because of this. You caught us in one of those times. I hope he understands that it isn't because I don't appreciate him as the one who brought me up. I just want to find closure with my biological father."

Rukia and Kazui chatted for a while more, reminiscing the happy times they had with Orihime. Before the petite woman left, Kazui remembered that his mother once told him to give a letter she wrote to Rukia after her passing.

" _Okaa-san_  told me to give it to you myself. For some reason, she didn't trust that  _Otou-san_  would pass it to you."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are changing  
> It seems strange and  
> I need to figure this out  
> You've got your life  
> I got mine  
> But you're all I cared about  
> Yesterday we were laughing  
> Today I'm left here asking  
> Where has all the time time gone now  
> I'm left alone somehow  
> Growing up and getting older  
> I don't want to believe it's over  
> \- Skillet, Don't say goodbye
> 
> This was what made me write 'Don't say goodbye' (the oneshot fic that became the prologue for this fic) in the first place. I thought it was so appropriate for the night before Ichigo and the humans left Soul Society after their battle with Yhwach.
> 
> Moving on, I rewrote Renji and Rukia's date like a hundred times. Yes, I'm exaggerating but it was seriously really hard for me to write a RenRuki. So I ended up doing away with the dialogues. Sorry, I cannot comprehend how their relationship could ever work. I'd probably write better lemon scenes than RenRuki, and I don't write lemons.
> 
> So anyway, next chapter will be about Orihime's letter. A little warning, it's going to get more depressing on Rukia's part after this, not that it hasn't already been depressing for our OTP. Lol! But I promise it will also get better at the end.


	12. Chapter 11: Women of grief and guilt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Orihime's letter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

_To my dearest friend, Rukia,_

_If you're reading this, I must've passed on from this world. This letter is one of the few assignments I entrusted to Kazui. He must've also told you that I am not too keen to let Kurosaki-_ kun _do the task. Haha... It is funny that I should address him like that after all these years._

_I am writing this to set things right. This is something even my Soten Kisshun will not be able to repair but I hope something good will come out of it. We can't change the past but we can determine our future. I am not sure if you will find peace with yourself after reading it. But I sincerely hope you will because, more than anything, I treasure the friendship we've always had. I treasure the sisterly bond between the two of us as comrades all those years ago._

_Rukia, I've always known there was something special between you and Ichigo ever since day one. The two of you share an amazing connection that will never rupture. I used to be so envious of what you have. I still do sometimes. And I am so terribly sorry that our circumstances have to come in the way to momentarily separate your beautiful souls._

_I remember, when we first came back from Soul Society, Ichigo was at a lost. He was so miserable with his life; he shut everyone out for two years. It was worse than those 17 months when he lost his powers. We heard from_ Otou-san _that Ichigo would go out at night in his_ shinigami _form – despite having no hollows to purify – and come home only to prepare to go to school. After school, he would take his food up to his room and lock himself there until it was time for him to do his night roaming. The only person who could get through to him was his own father. But even then,_ Otou-san _couldn't snap him out of it until the end of those two years._

_I'm not sure if it was a mistake, but I confessed to him after that. I told him to let me take care of him. I told him I knew about the both of you and I wanted him to give me a chance to make him happy, even if it was only for our time in this world. Just to kill time before he sees you again in the afterlife, you know?_

_It was the first time he looked me in the eye and my heart shattered into a million pieces at the sight of his soul that was reflected through them. How could anyone look so broken and empty at the same time? I cried when he told me he couldn't do that to me. He said it would be unfair to me because he could never get over losing you. I cried, not because he couldn't reciprocate my feelings, but because he was hurting so much. He didn't want his human life at all, that much was obvious. He was just dragging through time, day after day._

_Not long after the rejection, this guy from university asked me out. It was definitely a rebound relationship on my part. I thought I would try to fix myself after the rejection by going out with someone else. You must be wondering why I didn't go out with Uryuu-_ kun _. He did ask me but he was someone so close to me, I couldn't hurt him like that. As selfish as it sounds, I did not want to get over Ichigo. I was still hoping that someday he would see me as someone who could love him and make him happy. I was still hoping that someday he would love me the way I've always loved him. Sadly though, until this day, that never happened._

_I found out I was pregnant five years after the war. This man – Kazui's father – bailed out and said he wasn't ready for the commitment. I wanted to raise the child on my own. The only person I told this to was Tatsuki-_ chan _but she made it her business to discuss with the rest of the gang about it. The gang being Sado-_ kun _, Uryuu-_ kun _, and Ichigo._

_Uryuu-_ kun _proposed the day after. Again, I rejected him. He was upset but he said he understood. I don't know what happened but I was in my 20_ _th_ _week when Ichigo told me he would help me raise the child. He never asked if I wanted to marry him. When I agreed to his 'assistance' he took me to the marriage registrar where we signed our marriage papers. Needless to say, a huge argument erupted between Ichigo and Uryuu-_ kun _. After that, they hardly ever spoke to each other anymore. Uryuu-_ kun _threw himself into his work. We never got to see him, and years later, he sold his shares at his hospital and moved to Germany._

_Rukia, sometimes, I think I messed up a lot of lives. Sometimes, I_ know _I did. But I think by now, we both know that fate is a cruel thing. I can't help but wonder if Yhwach had something to do with this. I was there when he told Ichigo he would chop down any fate that he carved out for himself. I think Yhwach did it on purpose – that if he were to be destroyed, everyone else would go down with him._

_When Ichigo's_ reiatsu _suppression was removed, I could see how alive he was again. At first, I felt hurt that after so many years of marriage, this was the first time a glimpse of joy was reflected in his eyes. I was envious that his_ shinigami _life could bring him more satisfaction than our marriage. But I know, more than anything, his powers had always meant a lot to him. Without his powers, he lost his purpose in life. He lost life. So I let him perform his_ shinigami _duties without question._

_Like I've told you before, I am ready to leave this life. Despite not being totally there, Ichigo's presence in my life has made me happy. I used to wish I could fall in love with the same man if I had five lifetimes but one is good enough to show me that sometimes we don't hold the same string of fate as the person we fall in love with. It is better to let them go. That way, they will be happy and we will not be miserable having someone we love who can't love us back the way we want them to._

_I could never replace you in any way, Rukia. And I don't think Abarai-_ kun _could replace Ichigo either. You never said anything but I'm guessing the two of you were not even married. I just don't see it. It's kind of creepy but I see a lot of Ichigo in Ichika-_ chan _. Even though she looked to be the same age as Kazui when we first saw her, she is always so much more grown up compared to him, like she's much older. As she grew up into the young lady I've come to love as if she were my daughter, I could see more and more of Ichigo behind those brown hair and violet eyes, those mischievous smirks and thoughtful scowls. I hope you're not upset. Again, I'm just guessing._ Otou-san _told me Ichigo proposed to you. It doesn't look like something you would want to talk about so I never asked. And Ichigo... well, he doesn't talk about the past. In fact, he doesn't talk much. At all. I guess I'll never know._

_Whatever it is, I hope that someday you and Ichigo will find your happy ending. I hope that Yhwach's spell will be broken. And just like Snow White, you will awaken to the touch of your Black Knight._

_I wish you all the best, my_ nakama _. Take care of each other._

_Love,_

_Orihime_

By the time Rukia had finished reading the letter, she was numb. Her jaw and fists clenched, and she couldn't decide which emotions she wanted to entertain at that moment.

Guilt once again began to cloud her heart. She had already reconciled herself with Kaien's death. But this one is even bigger than anything she had ever felt before. She had destroyed Ichigo's human life by crashing into his world. She had hurt Renji when she couldn't reciprocate his feelings. She had caused confusion in the lives of Ichika and Kazui. And she had been the reason Orihime couldn't get her happy ending just because Ichigo couldn't get over her.

_No, Orihime, you didn't mess up. I did. Forgive me._

Happy ending? Happy endings are for fairy tales. Snow White, Black Knight. Those are fairy tale characters, aren't they?

_I can't have it. I don't deserve it._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprisingly, this was much easier to write.


	13. Chapter 12: You could've told me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Renji stays over at Ichigo's

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

Ichigo leaned out of his window and called out to his redhead friend, "Oi, get down here. It's drizzling."

Stubbing out his cigarette with his shoe, Renji climbed back into the house through Ichigo's old bedroom window. He could hear the other man in the kitchen downstairs, probably heating up their dinner, or something.

The Kurosaki home was now very quiet, with Ichigo being the only occupant. The twins had moved out decades ago when they got married. For a long time, there were only three of them – Ichigo, Orihime, and Kazui, who moved away a few years ago. Orihime was always in and out of the hospital for the treatment of her disease, which she eventually succumbed to.

It had been over a year since her passing. Almost 16 months, to be exact. Ichigo had been living alone since. So instead of mooching off Urahara at the  _shoten_ , Renji would stay at the clinic whenever he visited the world of the living.

The house was quite clean, considering that the sole occupant of the place was a man. There was no one to make a mess, anyway. Ichigo hardly visited any of the rooms except his own bedroom, the living room, and the kitchen. Every once in a while, Yuzu would drop by with some of her cooking to stock up his fridge with and help him clean the house wherever needed.

Ichigo had kept his old room for Renji, although there were many times when he wanted to move back into that small chamber. He missed it but there were just too many memories. Yuzu used that room for a while before she moved out. Other than that, nothing had changed. Even the old closet was still there, including the  _futon_  and a small stuffed bunny he never got rid of. He thought it would be appropriate for Renji to use that room since she was his...

"What's that?" Renji tilted his head towards the food the host was preparing.

Ichigo scowled. " _Ramen_ , what else?"

Renji scoffed. "Is that all you've been eating these days?"

"No. I just ran out of Yuzu's home-cooked meals."

"Man, I should've stayed at Urahara's place. At least Ururu cooks nice stuff," the redhead complained.

Ichigo shrugged. "Then, go back to the  _shoten_. I never asked you to stay here."

"Nah." Renji shook his head. "You need the company. You're getting pathetically lonely these days."

"I've grown used to it. Been like this since forever. Why were you smoking, anyway?" the  _shinigami daiko_  asked. It was the first time he had seen his friend smoke.

It took a while for Renji to come up with an answer, buying time by shoving food into his mouth as if he hadn't eaten in years. "Just felt like it."

"Huh..." Ichigo studied him with a raised eyebrow. "You're getting sloppy, too, with your  _zanjutsu_. Something bothering you?"

It was Renji's turn to shrug. "Haven't sparred in a while. Been pretty quiet here. Hueco Mundo's like a dead world after Ichika and her scouts practically wiped out those new threats. Third and fourth seats are the ones in-charged of training new recruits. There's nothing to do back at Soul Society."

"Don't you spar with Byakuya or the midget?"

Renji chuckled. "Careful, there. You don't want to die by pink petals or fluffy snow because of the way you address them."

Ichigo snorted. "I can take them on any time."

"Yeah, well... you still need to be on your guard. Can't mess with those Kuchiki uptight arses."

"You'd know better," Ichigo sniggered. "You didn't answer my question, though. Don't you spar with any of them?"

Renji got up from his seat to get a can of beer from the fridge. " _Taichou_ 's been busy, as usual."

"And Rukia?"

The  _fukutaichou_  shrugged again. "Busy, too, I guess."

"You guess? Don't you guys have family dinners or something to talk about your day?" Ichigo questioned. They never really talked about Rukia and Renji's relationship because they never felt the need to. But Ichigo would've expected them to at least see each other at night and talk a bit before bedtime. It's what all couples do, isn't it?  _Shinigami_  or not. On his part, Orihime was always the one doing all the talking while he read his Shakespeare collection in bed. Sometimes he would listen. Sometimes he would tune her out; especially when she became excited about a new red bean paste recipe she came across.

Instead of sitting at the dining table, Renji ambled towards the living room and plopped himself down on the couch in front of the TV. He picked up the remote control from the coffee table but before he made an attempt to press the red button to turn the TV on, he glanced at the expectant look on his friend's face.

Ichigo was still looking at him with one brow raised. The orange-haired man, now with some grey highlights, could tell that something had changed with his old comrade. Renji had been spending more time in the living world than he used to. Guys don't really talk to each other about personal matters unless it is really necessary. So Ichigo never asked and Renji never said anything.

The latter sighed, replaced the remote control on the table, and crossed his arm. "We're not what you think we are."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Dude," Renji began, showing Ichigo his left hand. "Have you ever seen either one of us with a ring?"

Ichigo furrowed his brows. "No, but I always thought it was a  _shinigami_  thing to not wear rings. Some married humans don't wear their wedding rings because they get in the way of their jobs."

Renji huffed. "Rukia and I are not married, Berryhead."

"Not married? You mean you're divorced? How did that happen?" Ichigo demanded, ignoring the nickname.

"No, stupid. We were never married. We don't even live together. We were engaged, once. It was just a formality – a requirement when the clan went berserk about the whole matter – so Ichika would take after my name," Renji blurted. He hadn't planned on telling this to Ichigo. He never felt it was his place to tell him. But things were going from bad to worse back at home. Rukia had lost herself in her job since her visit with Kazui and he didn't know what happened there. She just stopped talking to everyone all of a sudden.

At first, he thought it was because she was still mad at him for keeping that secret from her but he also remembered that they  _still_  had dinner with Byakuya and Ichika every once in a while after that. It was only when she came back from Nagoya a year ago that she had completely shut everyone out. No one knew what was going on. Not even Ichika.

And now that he had let some information slip, it was too late for him to back out of it. Ichigo would beat everything out of him.

"Wait. I don't follow – that whole 'Ichika taking your family name' thing. She's your daughter. By default, she takes your family name. And are you saying you got engaged after you knock Rukia up? No wonder the clan went berserk. What the hell were you guys thinking?" Ichigo chided.

That earned him a loud roar of laughter from Renji. Ichigo just sat at the other end of the couch, eyeing his friend curiously. The guy was clutching his stomach and in tears by the time he was done. "That was funny," Renji said, wiping away some tears that strayed from the corner of his eyes with his knuckles. "You're accusing me of bedding her before marriage when you were the one who got to her first."

Ichigo's cheeks flushed red as he watched Renji take a huge gulp of his beer, still laughing away. The half-human was getting annoyed that he wasn't let in on what was so funny. "She told you," he said quietly.

Renji gave one last short chuckle, took another swig of his drink, and sighed before turning around to face his friend. "She didn't have to. Ichika is the biggest evidence of your sex life."

Eyes widened, brows knitted, jaw clenched. "You shouldn't make a joke out of stuff like that," Ichigo accused, gritting his teeth and pointing a finger in his friend's face.

Renji slapped the finger away before explaining, "I'm not supposed to tell you this. It's not my place to. But Ichika's your kid. We're just not allowed to tell anyone about it. Not even Ichika herself. It was the only way Rukia could keep her. Well, that and if she found a surrogate father for the girl. That's where I came in. But eventually all that commotion died down and the Elders couldn't care less whether we were engaged or married anymore so we called it off." He skipped the part about them dating for two years. It wasn't important.

Ichigo was speechless. It did not make sense. First of all, the girl was the same age as Kazui. Second, she didn't have his orange hair or brown eyes. Heck, even Kazui looked more like him than Ichika did. It was probably because he and Orihime had similar features but that's beside the point. Ichika did not look like him. Or did she?

"Do you not see any resemblance of yourself in her? I mean, she doesn't look like me  _at all_. She's like..." Renji paused, looking around the living room before his eyes landed on Masaki's big poster, which Ichigo never got to take down all these years. He gestured a hand towards it and said, "There. Ichika looks exactly like your mother, but with purple eyes. No, she's like another Karin with different hair and eye colour. She's a K-Kurosaki and... and a Shiba and Rukia, all rolled into one. How could you not see it? I was hoping all these while, that somehow you would catch on to how Ichika looks different from me and question Rukia. And  _then_ , she would have to tell you the truth."

Ichigo shook his head absentmindedly. He tried to picture Ichika, whom he hadn't seen in over a year. Renji had told him that the girl had been promoted as a  _fukutaichou_  of the Second Division. Hence, she had not had the time to visit. He gasped when all he could think of was Karin's face when she was a teenager. He wasn't sure if he should blame Renji for putting that image in his mind but the more he thought about it, the more Ichika looked like his sisters, even Yuzu.

Clenching his fists, he snapped, "Why didn't anyone tell me about this?"

Renji pursed his lips as he drummed his fingers on his folded knee. He had brought this upon himself. Now, he had to think of a way to convey it to the other man without pissing him off... too much. He exhaled. "Like I said, we weren't allowed to tell anyone that you are Ichika's biological father. The girl knew she was not my kid way before we thought it was safe to tell her. She's a smart girl. I'm not sure if Rukia ever got to tell her about you. When the  _senkaimon_  first opened after the war, Rukia decided not to let you know because she heard that you were married and she didn't want it to get in the way of your marriage."

"You could have told me," Ichigo growled. "You  _knew_  about Kazui."

"Here we go again," Renji grumbled as he shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. "You and Rukia are going to be the death of me. Just like you, she forbade me from telling you, okay? I don't even know why I'm doing this. All I'm getting is my arse kicked for keeping things from either one of you."

Ichigo glared at his friend. He felt like crashing into Soul Society once again to demand a proper explanation from the midget. He hadn't been there since the war and now was probably a good time to create havoc there again.

"Look, I know it's all very sudden – and dammit, Rukia's going to kill me when she finds out I told you – but you need to calm the fuck down before you do what I think you're going to do. Rukia has been through hell to protect Ichika; especially from the clan. They were furious because she was an illegitimate child and their reputation was at stake. I know you're going to say 'screw them' but this whole thing was really hard for Rukia. So please, just think about her before you do anything. She has her reasons for keeping it from you. Just... Urgh, I'm so screwed. But I'm sure, in time, she will tell you about it herself," Renji rattled on, the beer and the anxiety of facing Rukia's wrath (again) making him feel apprehensive.

After a few minutes of contemplation, Ichigo said, "I want to see her."

Renji sighed, "I wish I could help you, man. But Rukia and I are not on talking terms. In fact, she's been keeping to herself for almost a year. I'm kind of worried but I'm guessing she probably needs her space or something. I'm planning on talking to  _Taichou_  about it."

"What happened?" Ichigo asked.

"I seriously do not know. It happened after the last time she came to the living world," Renji replied.

Ichigo narrowed his eyes. "And that was a year ago? What was she here for? She hardly visits and I haven't seen her since that last time when she found out about Kazui."

Renji hesitated but he knew he might as well have told Ichigo everything at this point. "She went to Nagoya to see Kazui."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone mentioned the letter was totally in-character of the 'selfish' Inoue Orihime of the manga. But I really did not mean to make Orihime sound like a selfish person in my fic. I just totally put myself in her character and wrote that letter. Like I mentioned in my author's note in that chapter, it was surprisingly easier to write compared to the chapter before that. But I suppose that's who she really is. It's not that she's selfish. She just thinks differently from everyone else. Maybe she thought that by offering to take care of Ichigo, she would be able to fill the void Rukia left in him. Maybe she thought she was doing Uryuu a favour by not hurting him when she rejected him. Maybe she thought she could still help Ichigo get on with life when she kept her feelings for him in case if one day, he really needed her. Who knows? Lol! Oh no… now that I think about it, this character is seriously a joke created by Kubo-sensei.
> 
> Next chapter, we'll see an Ichika and Kazui interaction.


	14. Chapter 13: Best friends forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichika visits her human childhood friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

Abarai Ichika shoved her hand into the bag to grab a fistful of crisps and rested her legs across the coffee table without taking her eyes off the telly. She was watching a Cantonese movie with Japanese subtitle. It had a lot of huge ass sword-fighting scenes – perfect for someone like her who loved watching stuff with lots of action and some really wicked humour. She had just arrived at the apartment she was in, had broken into it with a trick she learnt from Tatsuki- _obasan_  when she was much younger. Humans are so weird. They always manage to foul up their own security system.

Her superior hearing ability told her that her human best friend had just come out of the elevator. Turning down the volume of the TV, she braced herself for his usual overreaction. There was a pause before the knob was turned. Ichika rolled her eyes. She had forgotten to lock the door after she came in.

"For  _Kami_ 's sake, would you please stop breaking into my apartment?" Kazui admonished, tossing his keys into a bowl on the console table before removing his shoes at the  _genkan_.

"Sorry," Ichika murmured half-heartedly, turning up the volume again.

Kazui walked around the couch to have a look at her and huffed. "Doesn't Urahara- _san_  make older-looking  _gigai_  for you? I can't take you anywhere like that. I'm going to look like a paedophile."

"So many questions," Ichika grumbled. "I'm not going anywhere. This movie is nice."

The man flopped next to her on the couch and crossed his arms. "That's such an old movie. It's older than you."

"And  _I'm_  older than you. Look how much more interesting I am compared to you," Ichika smirked.

"That movie is more than twenty years older than you. It's ancient. You're not ancient to me. Five years is like this," Kazui countered, indicating the size of a peanut with his thumbnail pressing the tip of his little finger.

Ichika looked at him questioningly. "I don't know what the point of your argument is."

Kazui opened his mouth to reply but found nothing to get back at her. "Yeah, neither do I," he sighed. "What are you doing here, anyway? Don't you have  _fukutaichou_  work to do,  _Abarai-fukutaichou_?"

The brunette cringed at the title. "That's Renji- _san_. Not me. I'm just Ichika- _fukutaichou_. It helps clear the confusion at  _fukutaichou_  meetings," she explained.

"So he's 'Renji- _san_ ', now. You've been calling him plenty of different names," he said, getting up from the couch to go to the kitchen.

Ichika had told him once that the redhead  _shinigami_  was not her real father. She trailed after Kazui, disregarding Chow Xin Chi's  _Royal Tramp_  still playing on the screen. "I never know how to address him," she admitted.

Kazui scoffed, tossing her a can of coffee before getting one for himself. "If I can call Kurosaki Ichigo ' _Otou-san_ ', then you can call Renji- _ojisan_  that too."

The shinigami flinched at her friend's remark. She pretended to study the can in her hand. Whoever drinks coffee in a can?

When she looked up, Kazui was leaning on the kitchen counter, arms crossed again, with a serious expression on his face as he looked back at her. "I take it your silence means you know about it."

"Know about what?"

"Don't mess with me,  _shinigami_. You know  _Tou-san_  is actually your dad," he stated.

Shoulders slumped, she asked, "Did someone tell you?"

Kazui chuckled. "So it's true."

Ichika exclaimed in shock, "You didn't know!"

The 43-year-old shook his head and smirked. "My mum suspected it. After Rukia- _obasan_  left last year, I finally read the letter  _Okaa-san_  wrote to me. She said she had a feeling you're  _Otou-san_ 's daughter. She said she hoped I would understand if I ever found out it was true because  _Otou-san_  and Rukia- _obasan_  were together back in the day when they were comrades."

Ichika bit her lower lip, keeping her head bowed. "I'm sorry. I only found out before my installation. That's why I haven't been visiting. I didn't know how to face you," she said.

Kazui chuckled again. "You are the last person who needs to apologise, Ichika. This whole web of lies we're caught in is our parents' doing."

They both kept quiet for a while, drinking their coffee, just letting this awkward moment pass. They had been best of friends for almost forty years. Ichika was worried this new discovery of their roots would destroy their friendship.

"You seem unaffected by it," Ichika commented.

"I've got to admit that I was mad at first. My parents kept so many things from me. It's like, every year, I would find out something new – mostly not very pleasant – about me, about mum and dad. I just want a normal family, Ichika. That's why I moved here: to look for the normal side of my life."

Ichika regarded him sympathetically. She didn't know what normal was. She had never been normal. She was a soul. She attended the Shinō Academy at the age of 12 and killed her first hollow at the age of 15. She was taught that her life's purpose was to  _die_  protecting humans, family, and friends. She practically lived to die. Sometimes, she envied Kazui because his life seemed so much purer compared to hers.

But looking at him now, she knew he didn't have it easy either. It must've freaked him out when Kurosaki- _san_  – also  _her_   _Otou-san_  now – left his lifeless body for the first time when Kazui was 21. This man couldn't see spirits like his mother could. Even Karin- _obasan_  and Yuzu- _obasan_  could sense spiritual pressure. In a world of abnormalities, he was the only one who was normal. He must've felt so alone.

"I'm sorry," she said again.

"Why do you keep saying you're sorry?" he asked. "You're also another victim of this. I don't know about you but I'm not surprised anymore when new information about my life keeps popping up. Every day there's something new. It gets old sometimes," he laughed at his own oxymoron remark.

Ichika leaned on the counter next to him. They looked odd together. Like father and daughter standing next to each other. The woman had the figure of a 15-year-old, almost like how her mother was when she first met her father. Kazui, on the other hand had the looks of a middle-aged man.

"So, what are you going to do?" she asked.

Kazui shrugged. "Nothing. What can I do? Can't change the past," he replied, taking a sip of his coffee.

Ichika sighed. "Are you ever going back to Karakura to see Kurosaki- _san_?"

The man pursed his lips, staring ahead of him at the kitchen clock on the wall.

"I think you should. I'm sure he's worried about you," Ichika said when he didn't answer. "Any parent would, biological or not."

Kazui nodded. "Maybe. Maybe I'll drop by for a visit. Clear things up a bit. Release him of his  _chains_  so he wouldn't think he has to stay in this world because of me."

"Kazui." Ichika stepped in front of him to face him. Their height difference wasn't much. Ichika was quite tall in stature. "I'm not taking his side just because I just found out he's my father, too. But I've seen how Renji- _san_  is always concerned about me even though I'm not his daughter. He doesn't even live with us. The only thing tying us together is a name. I think Kurosaki- _san_  would be even more concerned about you because the man practically raised you."

"Yeah," he snorted. "Whatever. We shall see. How's your mum, anyway?"

Ichika's eyes were downcast again. "She's upset about something. Been working like the soldier that she is. Buries herself in her paperwork. On days when her paperwork is done, she would work the new recruits off at the training ground. She's quiet during meal times. I hardly see her."

"Any idea what happened to her?"

The  _shinigami_  shook her head. "I'm here because I thought you might know something. I'm not blaming you but she became like that after she came to see you. I just want to know what happened here."

Kazui furrowed his brows. When Rukia- _obasan_  left his apartment after they shared memories of his mother, it didn't seem like something was amiss. They even made a few jokes about how the next time she came over, she would put on the  _gigai_  of a wrinkly old lady.

"Nothing out of the ordinary happened. I apologised about how I ran out on her back in Karakura. I told her my frustration about  _Otou-san_. We talked about mum. Rukia- _obasan_  left on a happy note," he recalled. And then, it dawned on him: "It must've been the letter."

Ichika tilted her head. "What letter?"

" _Okaa-san_  wrote her a letter before she died. It must've somehow upset her when she read it at home," Kazui replied. "I'm sorry."

Ichika sighed. "It's not your fault. Our parents are just so complicated. They must've done something to upset fate to be so messed up."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's quite amusing how I began to like these two new Bleach characters after writing them.


	15. Chapter 14: Seeking for a place where he belongs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both Kazui and Ichigo decide to return to their roots.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

Ichigo came home in his spirit form to see Kazui sitting on the love seat, watching his empty human body sprawled out on the couch across from him. The younger man had his elbows rested on his knees and his fingers steepled. The older Kurosaki wasn't sure if he should enter his body right now. Maybe he should wait for his adopted son to leave the living room. He didn't want Kazui to feel weird about getting caught staring at him.  _If only he could sense my_ reiatsu _, or at least hear me._

Just then, his front door clicked open, and in came Renji in his usual loud shirt, baggy jeans, and a bandanna. The redhead took one glance at Ichigo the  _shinigami_  and he understood that Kazui wasn't aware of his father's presence.

"Kazui," Renji greeted as he shut the door behind him. "You're home."

The human stood up from his seat and bowed. " _Konnichiwa_ , Renji- _ojisan_."

"Ah,  _konnichiwa_. Your father should be back soon. He's gone out on a patrol. Come, let's go and grab a drink while we wait for him," Renji said, gesturing to the kitchen.

Kazui nodded and led the way. As Renji passed him, Ichigo also gave him a nod of thanks for diverting Kazui's attention somewhere else.

By the time they came back out to the living room, Ichigo was already sitting up on the couch in his human body. Father and son shared a glance, a nod of acknowledgment; like it was the first time they met each other.

Renji cleared his throat. "I'm going to go by Urahara's place for the afternoon. There's something I need to discuss with him," he excused himself before bidding goodbye to the Kurosakis and leaving the house.

"How are you?" Ichigo asked when Kazui sat down across from him.

The son shrugged. "Okay, I guess."

"I was planning on going over to Nagoya to see you tomorrow. Renji- _ojisan_  is staying one more night here," Ichigo said.

"You don't have to anymore since I'm here today."

"Are you coming back for good any time soon?" the substitute  _shinigami_  asked.

Kazui's eyes travelled around the room, picking up memories he made growing up in this house. "I don't think I want to come back here,  _Otou-san_ ," he began slowly. "There are just too many things here. It's hard to get over  _Okaa-san_ 's death when I'm constantly reminded of her."

Ichigo nodded in understanding. "So you're going to settle down in Nagoya?"

"Maybe just for a couple of years," Kazui replied. "And then, I might travel elsewhere."

Ichigo leaned back on the couch and studied his adopted son. Even though he wasn't close to Kazui like other fathers are to their sons, they shared more conversations than he ever did with Orihime. It made him sad to think that maybe he should've tried harder to treat her better but there was always this wall between the two of them. He knew Kazui could sense the existence of the wall and the boy was very protective of his mother. When he was much older and started to understand that his parents' relationship was different from that of his friends' parents', he began to distant himself from his father.

Ichigo could still remember the night Kazui ran away from home after Orihime told him that his biological father left them. He was 12 years old, then. That was also the night Ichigo and Orihime had their first argument because she did not discuss with him before revealing the truth to Kazui. She was left at home alone, crying, while Ichigo went everywhere to search for the boy. When he found him on a swing at a park almost a town away at 1.00am, he sat down with him in silence until Kazui fell asleep two hours later. Ichigo had carried him all the way home.

After that, they never spoke about it until he turned 18. That's when he declared that he was going to look for his biological father in Nagoya. Ichigo didn't want to stop him but Orihime was against it. Being the obedient mama's boy he always was, Kazui decided to put his search on hold.

And then, Ichigo's  _reiatsu_  suppression was lifted when Kazui was 21. Once again, the boy felt betrayed that his parents had kept yet another secret from him. What, did they think he would always be too young to understand anything? He was in his second year of engineering school when that happened. He stopped his studies and started job-hopping. He kept going back to enrol in universities, though. But he never graduated until the recent years when Orihime was very ill.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" Ichigo asked, breaking the silence.

Kazui twirled the bottle of drink Renji had gotten for him earlier. "Yes."

"That's good, I hope."

"It is."

Ichigo nodded.

"I know about Ichika," Kazui asserted.

If Ichigo was surprised, he did not show it. He just waited for his son to continue what he had to say.

"I know she's your daughter. She came to see me yesterday," Kazui explained.

"So she knows."

"Why didn't you tell me?" His voice was laced with hurt. Despite the fact that his life was full of surprises, it still didn't get any easier whenever something like this turned up.

Ichigo sighed. "I never knew she was my daughter. Renji- _ojisan_  accidentally told me last night."

Kazui smirked. "Seems like they are more alike than they think. I tricked Ichika into telling me the truth. Mum wrote in her letter that she thought Ichika's personality was a lot like yours."

The older man furrowed his brows. Orihime had known all along and she never brought it up. But then again, he couldn't blame her. They hardly talked. Renji and Rukia interacted more like a married couple than they did.

"I think you should go back to Soul Society," Kazui suggested, earning a startled look from his father. "That's where you've always wanted to be. Maybe you could patch things up with Rukia- _obasan_."

"Kazui..."

"I'll be fine,  _Otou-san_ ," the son interrupted. "I'm a normal human being. I don't belong in your world. You weren't supposed to raise me but you did. I think  _Okaa-san_  and I have taken so much more of your time than we should. I appreciate it that you took care of me all those years. I really do. I'm sure  _Okaa-san_  does, too.

"From here on in, I need to find a place where I can live a normal life and die a normal human being. It's not that I want to cut ties with you but I don't want you to feel obligated to carry on living in this human world just because you promised to take care of someone else's human child. I'm an adult now, and I won't be coming back to Karakura. So, there really isn't any reason for you to stay. Even after you've moved to Soul Society, you can still drop by to visit Karin- _obasan_  and Yuzu- _obasan_ , anyway."

That night, Ichigo had a proper dinner with Kazui for the first and the last time in a long while. It was the first time after Isshin had 'passed on' that they had one. The little family never had celebration dinners unless Yuzu or Karin was around. Ichigo used to either skip dinner in favour of working late at the clinic or have his dinner at the living room while watching a football game or the news. It was definitely the last one, as Kazui would take his last ride back to Nagoya after that, never to return to Karakura again.

* * *

"You're sure about this?" Renji asked when the  _senkaimon_  opened.

"Yeah," Ichigo exhaled. "It's been a while."

"Alright, try to keep up," Renji smirked before the two of them ran through the  _dangai_.

* * *

Father and son stared up into the open sky outside the Shiba manor, puffing away on their cigarettes after a full dinner prepared by Kuukaku herself. They were both lying in the grass, arms pillowing their heads, just enjoying the quiet night at the First District of Rukongai. The cigarettes were brought from the human world by Ichigo, who knew his father had missed them. Before this, Renji was his delivery boy who would ensure his monthly supply never ceased. Smoking was like drinking tea to him after he moved back to Soul Society. He didn't have to worry about lung cancer anymore.

Once the Shiba clan had been reinstated, Kuukaku and Ganju made sure to rebuild a proper mansion on their vast Shiba land. Isshin had huge quarters to himself and he had also prepared a few chambers for his kids when they passed over. He wasn't very sure if the twins would be able to find their way when they arrived at the Rukongai but Ichigo was a different case of  _ryoka_  who never followed standard procedures. Even his soul was different after everything that he had gone through. Both Kurotsuchi and Urahara had confirmed that Ichigo's transition to Soul Society would be as simple as leaving his human body behind in the human world as if it were a  _gigai_. But of course, he would have to dispose it off by burial or cremation because it cannot be preserved like one.

Isshin inhaled the smoke deeply before releasing what was left that did not enter his soul's lungs. "Ichika- _chan_ , huh? I knew there was something about her. But Rukia- _chan_  kept it so well. I heard they hid her in the Second District until the girl was three before they went back to stay at the Kuchiki Manor. I knew she wasn't Renji's. Just didn't know when she was born."

"I'm surprised things like that get by your nosy self," Ichigo commented.

"I've been busy, son. I only see that girl when I visit the Seireitei to have a drink with Shunsui. I should've recognised the hair, though. But then again, brown is a common colour."

The two lapsed into a familiar, comfortable silence. This was something they used to do after the war until Isshin had to move to Soul Society. The first two years, it was all Isshin who was the one talking. Every evening, without fail before Ichigo went on his roaming, the father would sit at the rooftop with the son who was quietly trying to cope with life without Rukia. Eventually, Ichigo started talking, too. And they would enjoy their nightly routine even when Isshin's  _gigai_  had stopped responding and he could only hang out on the roof in his  _shinigami_  form.

Isshin never mentioned this, but he was thankful to Rukia for being the catalyst who helped mend his relationship with Ichigo. The substitute  _shinigami_  on his part, had to admit that if it weren't for the midget, he would never have known that the serious side of his father existed.

"I'm moving here as soon as I can. There's nothing left for me in the human world," Ichigo said, tossing his cigarette butt into the distance.

Isshin backhanded the side of his son's head. "Before you do that, you've got to learn to put your trash away properly. Your cousin will throw a fit if she finds out what you did."

Ichigo grumbled as he rubbed his sore spot, "Stupid old goat-chin will never change."

But they both knew it wasn't the cigarette butt Isshin was referring to.

The Shiba clan head chuckled. "But  _you_  have changed. Why are you not retaliating like you used to? You have lost your energy the day you lost my precious third daughter. I warned you, didn't I, about making the right choice? I think you screwed up big time as a human. It's just not your forte."

"Yeah, yeah. Add lots of salt. Make me feel like the worst person ever. If it makes you sleep better at night, then I'll take it. At least  _someone_  is happy," Ichigo huffed as he sat up, wrapping his arms around his knees.

Isshin laughed again. But this time, it was dry and devoid of his usual carefree persona. "I hardly sleep at night, Ichigo. What makes you think Papa is happy watching you suffer all these years?"

The orange-haired man hid the bottom half of his face behind his propped up knees as he surveyed the open field ahead of them. The Shiba property was not regal like the Kuchiki's which reflected their strict, illiberal, and stringent bindings. The Shiba was a different sort of nobility compared to the other clans because their investment was in nature, and family, and a laid-back serene life, independent from the societal demands and pressure.  _Rukia would be happier here,_  he thought.

"Any ideas on how you're going to die? I've always loved a tragic end to my human life, like my car derailing off the cliff as I'm drifting down Mount Haruna or something. It was too bad that my  _gigai_  had to fail before any of that could happen," Isshin mused.

Ichigo threw an abhorring glance at his father. Isshin never failed to come up with the most ridiculous things to say to spoil the moment. "I was thinking of a sudden death, like a cardiac arrest. No explanation needed. After that, a cremation would be a good idea."

"Hmm," Isshin nodded. "You're going to need a doctor to certify that."

"Yeah..."  _And I know just the person to do it._

* * *

_At the Kuchiki Manor…_

"That  _reiatsu_ …" the petite captain of the 13th Division mumbled, tossing and turning on her  _futon_. "What the hell is he doing here?"

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Looks like somebody is going to have to pay someone a visit. 
> 
> Ichigo-Kazui = difficult to write
> 
> Isshin-Ichigo = natural
> 
> Yes, I loved Initial D. It was the very first Japanese anime I watched. 
> 
> A reader mentioned that 'Kazui came across very Uryu-esque' in the previous chapter. I have to agree. I did not realise it until after I've read it a few times. 


	16. Chapter 15: Ruined lives

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rukia tries to cheat her way out of talking, Ichigo cheats his way to Germany.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

" _Nii-sama_ ," Rukia addressed her brother with a bow before she entered the Kuchiki dining hall.

Byakuya nodded, keeping his eyes on his adopted sister as she took a seat beside him at the table. He noticed the weight-loss and the dark circles around her eyes. It was as Renji had told him – Rukia wasn't doing very well. She had been shutting everyone out, isolating herself, and no one knew the reason behind it.

The servants began to place the dishes on the table. Byakuya observed the way his sister eyed the most delicious food prepared by the best Kuchiki chefs. She didn't look interested at all. Unimpressed.

The  _taichou_  of the Sixth Division had suspected something was wrong with Rukia for over a year. It was different from that time he found her down with a morning sickness. When she was pregnant, she had been devastated that Kurosaki would not be around with her and their child. But there was still a notable glow – the radiance of an expectant mother – on her being.

This time around, she looked lifeless, like all the energy she used to have had seeped away. At first, he thought it was because age was catching up and the captaincy was weighing down on her. But then, he doubted that was the case. His sister had always been a very tough person. She could take anything life threw at her.  _Everything_ , but...

An image of Shiba Kaien passed through his mind. He remembered now, how the death of the former  _fukutaichou_  of the 13th Division had affected her. Here, at this table, was the same Rukia he saw after that man died. She looked dejected. She looked crestfallen. She looked subjugated by guilt. Yes.  _Guilt_. That was it. She blamed herself for the death of Shiba Kaien.

But that was a long time ago. Byakuya had seen how much Rukia had changed after she met the  _ryoka_  and gave her powers to him. She had been able to accept that killing Shiba was an act of liberating his soul rather than ending his life. She had reconciled with the surviving Shiba siblings and herself. Grudgingly, Byakuya admitted that it was all thanks to the man she had fallen in love with; even shared a child with. He seemed to have brought the sun back into her life. He brought  _life_  back into her life.

So did something happen again to cause her to revert to the post-Shiba Rukia? He snarled inwardly at the thought of another Shiba who resembled the dead one behind his sister's grief. And speaking of grief, it couldn't be that this involved the healer  _ryoka_  woman whom Kurosaki ended up marrying, could it?

Byakuya sighed. His sharp-mindedness told him that it could. It was the highest possibility. He recalled Renji telling him that Rukia became upset after she came back from visiting the son of that woman. The son who was not Kurosaki's but was adopted by him. It seems that every man is trying to be a saint, taking other people's children and raising them as their own. And then, he realised that he was no different from them when he, too, adopted Rukia as his sister.

Once their quiet dinner was over, Rukia excused herself with a bow. The Kuchiki clan head narrowed his eyes at her barely-touched bowl of rice. He must speak to her now before she caused further damage upon herself.

"Rukia," he called.

The woman looked up at her brother.

"You have not eaten," Byakuya stated.

Rukia glanced at her bowl before returning her gaze to her brother.

"Tell me what is bothering you," he sort of ordered, albeit gently. This was not something he usually did.

The petite woman – who had shrunken even more – was taken aback at the almost tender tone of her brother's voice.

When she continued to keep silent, Byakuya said, "I was told that you have not been eating or resting adequately. You have also indulged yourself excessively in your work. At this rate..."

"I'm fine,  _Nii-sama_ ," she interrupted. "Whoever told you that does not know what they are talking about." She had never spoken to him with disregard before. It seemed that she didn't care about anything anymore.

At any other time, Byakuya would've admonished her for her behaviour. But this woman was no longer the sister he had come to know; the sister who always looked highly upon him with honour and respect. Rukia had changed. Her face held a hardened expression, which he had never seen before. Whoever did this to her was going to die a shameful death, cut into pieces by his  _sakura_  petals.

"Why are you doing this to yourself?" he asked.

Rukia huffed. "Doing what,  _Nii-sama_?"

"Answer the question, Rukia."

"I do not know what you are talking about," she said evasively.

Byakuya clenched his fists. Where was his sweet, compliant sister? What happened to Kuchiki Rukia, his pride? He continued to stare at her, commanding in silence for her obedience to return.

With a defeated look, Rukia squeezed her eyes shut, and swallowed hard. She sighed when she opened them again. "Nii-sama, it really does not matter what I am doing to myself or why I am doing it," she replied. "After all, I have ruined too many lives."

"Are you talking about Kurosaki and his family?"

She didn't have to answer. He already knew.

* * *

"Kurosaki!" Uryuu hissed as he quickly shut the door to his office.

"Yo..." Ichigo greeted. He was seated in the fashion writer's chair... in his  _shinigami_  form.

Uryuu regarded his old rival in resentment. It wasn't fair. Ichigo looked like the 18-year-old self he used to be after the war.

The former doctor took two large strides towards his cousin to throw him off his desk chair. "You're going to frighten my assistant when she finds my chair spinning around on its own."

"You could always say it's been possessed," Ichigo offered, studying the other man from head to toe. "What the fuck? You look like your old man," he commented as he burst out laughing.

Running his fingers through his grey hair, Uryuu growled, "What are you doing here?"

Ichigo gradually stopped his guffaw before he stated, "I need your help."

"What could I possibly help you with? You have  _everything_ ," Uryuu asserted with a bitter tone, biting that last word.

"I don't have  _everything_ ," Ichigo mimicked. "I need you to declare me dead."

"And why would I do that?" Uryuu asked, sitting down in his big chair.

Ichigo deadpanned, "Because I'm dead."

"Don't be stupid. You're not."

The orange-haired man folded his arms across his chest. "Oh, come on, Ishida. I'm moving to Soul Society. I can't just leave my human body to rot in my room."

"You are more of a doctor than I am. Declare yourself."

"Now,  _you're_  being stupid."

"No.  _Stupid_  is marrying the woman you don't even have feelings for," Uryuu barked, gripping the armrests beside him.

"Seriously? After all these years, you're still mad?" Ichigo asked incredulously. It had been almost fifty years. He couldn't believe the Quincy was still holding grudges against him for that.

"What do you expect, Kurosaki? You knew I loved her. You knew I proposed to her. But you married her anyway, when you don't even love her. Was that your way of declaring victory over our rivalry? Huh?" Uryuu snapped accusatively. "That was low, even for you. Some comrade."

Ichigo grunted, pacing the floor at the side of Uryuu's desk before he stopped at his previous spot. "I'm sorry."

The Quincy scoffed.

"Ishida, I know I screwed up. But my mind was clouded at that time. I just wanted to fulfill Rukia's wish and get my life over with," Ichigo explained, even though it didn't make sense to him.

Uryuu stood up and pointed a condemning finger at the  _shinigami_. "You are a fucking coward, putting the blame on Kuchiki. You could've waited and have a little faith. Even if you didn't want to, you could've married someone else."

The two Quincy war heroes glared at each in silence.

"You're right," Ichigo conceded with a slump of his shoulders.

"Excuse me?" Uryuu pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose before crossing his arms.

"I said, you are right. You don't have to make me repeat that. Geez..."

The dark-haired human smirked in triumph.

Ichigo narrowed his eyes. "Bastard." That had always been the basis of their argument: neither one of them wanted to admit that the other was ever right.

Uryuu heaved a long sigh. "I don't think I would've married her, anyway."

"Why not?" Ichigo asked, raising his brows. After all the enmity they had between them, Uryuu wouldn't have married Orihime?

"She would want to have kids and... I wouldn't have wanted that," he replied.

"What are you talking about?"

"Look, of all the races," Uryuu paused, pushing the inside of his cheek with his tongue. "Of all the races, no matter how proud I am of mine, the Quincy remains the most cunning, most power-hungry one. It's toxic to the universe. I would rather not pass that down."

"Huh... Never thought I'd ever hear that coming from you," Ichigo muttered, crossing his arms again.

"How come you never had your own kids?" Uryuu questioned. He had been constantly kept posted on the life of their friends by Chad. Sometimes even Tatsuki would give him a holler on one of the social media.

Ichigo shrugged. "I'm part-Quincy."

"That's  _my_  excuse. Get your own," Uryuu snarled.

"I never touched her," Ichigo admitted.

"What?"

Ichigo knew it was more of a 'why' than 'what'. "I couldn't."

Uryuu nodded. "At least there's some integrity in you."

"Oh, please. I'm not  _that_  pure," Ichigo dismissed.

"I never said you were but what do you mean by that?"

"I just found out I have a daughter. With Rukia."

In one swift motion, Uryuu grabbed the collar of the  _shinigami_ 's  _shihakusho_  and slammed the man against the wall. "You cheated on Inoue!"

"Calm down!" Ichigo tried to pull Uryuu's grip off. "It happened before we came back. I never cheated on Orihime. Not even when Rukia started visiting the human world."

Uryuu released him, but not without another shove. He sat back down on his chair and straightened the coat he was wearing. "Abarai would've killed you, anyway."

"They're not married," Ichigo mumbled, brushing invisible dust off of his robe.

Uryuu's eyebrows creased at that. "Huh?"

"Ichika took Renji's family name so Rukia could keep her. Some messed up clan requirement that I don't even want to know about."

Uryuu nodded as if he understood.

"So are you going to help me or not?" Ichigo asked again, almost pleading.  _Almost_.

His bespectacled cousin shook his head. "I can't."

"Why not?"

"I'm not a practising doctor. I haven't renewed my licence in 20 years. They would think I killed you."

Ichigo huffed, grousing, "Why did I come all the way here to see you, then?"

"You didn't even spend a single  _yen_  to get here. Cheat-travelling in your soul form..." Uryuu murmured. "You should be ashamed of yourself."

The strawberry chuckled. "Hey, I had to run through the  _dangai_  twice to get here. Once, to Soul Society, and another time to Germany. It's hard work evading the Cleaner."

"Pfft. Stupid, as usual."

"Fuck off, Ishida."

Uryuu ignored him and went into a deep thought before he exhaled. "I can't certify your death. But I can help arrange your funeral. It's the least I could do for an idiot cousin like you."

"Gee, thanks," Ichigo said, rolling his eyes.

"You're welcome. Can't pass up a chance to watch you burn," the other man smirked.

"How did you know I wanted a cremation?"

"I didn't. It's the cheaper option if I were to pay for your funeral."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote the Quincy conversation before the Kuchikis'. But the latter was kind of intense compared to the former so I decided to leave this chapter 'on a lighter note' instead.


	17. Chapter 16: Die another day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ishida Uryuu puts 'fun' in the funeral.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

Two  _shinigami_  with bright hair – one orange and one red – leaned against the back wall of the Kurosaki living room watching the ceremony before them as if it were a movie. There was a small crowd present; including family, close friends, neighbours, and some former patients. As the living room wasn't very big, everyone cramped into whatever space they could find; on the couch, on the floor, and on some chairs they brought out from the dining room. They were all sitting in a semi-circle, facing a large portrait of Ichigo in his younger days when he had less grey hair. It was probably taken during one of those times when he had to renew his licence. He didn't look happy. Then again, Kurosaki Ichigo never looked happy. The urn of his ashes was placed on a table with some mourning candles beside the portrait.

Next to that table, stood his cousin  _slash_  fellow warrior  _slash_  former rival, Ishida Uryuu who had generously offered to deliver Ichigo's eulogy. He claimed he had taken the most expensive non-stop 12-hour flight from Munich to Haneda to do this for him. Needless to say, the orange-haired  _shinigami_  was pissed as he listened to what the bastard had to say about him. He knew the guy was using this opportunity to get back at him for marrying the girl of his dreams.

_Arsehole thinks everything is about him. I did not marry Orihime just because she's the girl of his dreams. What does he think I am?_

It wasn't helping the way his friends  _and_  sisters were reacting to Uryuu's words.

Chad was okay. He was full of respect, as always.

Mizuiro had his head bowed, glancing at the direction of the  _shinigami_  every once in a while. He and Keigo could only feel their presence and hear them, but couldn't see them.

Keigo... he was being the usual perv, ogling at the women who were present. Ichigo didn't even recognise who they were.

Tatsuki hid a knowing smirk. She could see him and Renji, but just barely.

Yuzu. Poor Yuzu was bawling her eyes out. Even though she knew Ichigo could still visit them, she was not as attuned to sensing  _reiatsu_  as Karin was. So she would not be able to properly see him as well unless he donned on a  _gigai_  but that would be creepy because people might think that he had risen from the dead. It's a good thing they kept the soul tickets Kyouraku- _soutaichou_  had given to them and the weird trio ages ago. That way, they would also be able to visit Soul Society.

And Karin. Yeah, he could totally count on Karin to mask her snickering behind her  _weep of devastation._  Especially...

 _Especially_  when that damn Uryuu mentioned, "I guess he was too heartbroken that his wife had left him. He must miss all of her bedtime stories of aliens, robots, and zombies, and mouth-watering red bean paste concoction."

Ichigo visibly blenched, earning a hard slap on the back from Renji and a death glare from Uryuu.

And Karin... She just snapped and ran her 60-year-old self towards the kitchen with an outburst.

Ichigo did not need to see it to know she was clutching her stomach, bending over the sink, and trying to keep the noise of her laughter from getting out.

 _Oh wait, is that Chad's shoulders shaking, I see? Unbelievable! Morons. Everyone's a moron._  You'd think people would start taking him seriously when he's dead; at the very least, during his goddamn funeral. Instead, they were beaming with joy that he's gone from this world.

He furrowed his brows as he turned to face the pineapple head next to him and found him sniggering into his own fist. Nobody truly knows the meaning of 'Fuck my life' until they've stepped into his slippers right this moment.

After the guests had left and only those who knew about his  _shinigami_  life remained in his old home, Renji approached Uryuu and shook his hand. "That was one hell of a eulogy, Ishida," he congratulated, his free hand giving the Quincy a pat on the shoulder. "I couldn't have given a better one myself for the carrot-top."

And everyone laughed. Including Yuzu. Little (even at 60), innocent, doe-eyed Yuzu.

Ichigo knew there was a reason why he hated his human life.

* * *

Upon their arrival at Soul Society, Ichigo and Renji had to lug the orangehead's possession from the human world – which were already converted to  _reishi_  – to the Shiba manor. Ichigo complained that they should have also converted his car. Or a helicopter.

They were nearing their destination when they both sensed a familiar  _reiatsu_  leaving his family's property. The two male  _shinigami_  glanced at each other in surprise before Renji grabbed the stuff from Ichigo's hands, jerking his head towards the direction of the manor to tell him to get there immediately.

With a nod, the former substitute  _shunpo_  towards his new home. Only to find the presence of the person he was looking for, gone.

"Sorry, son." Isshin came out of the house to greet him. "You just missed Rukia- _chan_  by a few seconds. I tried to get her to stay a bit longer but she said she has something important to tend to."

Ichigo sighed, "She's fast. I can't sense her anymore."

"She's good at masking her  _reiatsu_."

Just then, Renji arrived, huffing in exhaustion from all the things he had to carry on his own. "Did you get to see her?" he asked, trying to catch his breath.

Ichigo shook his head.

The redhead cast his friend a sympathetic look. "I'll see what I can do. Maybe after you unpack, we could drop by the Kuchiki manor."

* * *

She could hear it. The argument they were having at the courtyard. She had kept herself in her bedroom since she got back from the Shiba manor. It was her monthly house-call to Isshin for the 'rogue'  _shinigami_  report. Every visit, she would keep it short and impersonal.

The old man she used to live with had set up a clinic on the Shiba property. He also had plans to start a medical centre where he would be able to offer his service to residents of the Rukongai. It was a concept Rukia found to be very philanthropic. As a former citizen of this part of Soul Society, she was touched by his compassion for the underprivileged souls. She was certain, now that Ichigo had moved here, he would be assisting his father since he was also a doctor in the human world.

Speaking of the strawberry idiot, he was still yelling at the guards stationed outside her home.  _Nii-sama_  had given them strict orders not to allow the  _ryoka_  in. The minute the Sixth Division  _taichou_  got news about Ichigo's coming to the Soul Society, he had upped the security level against letting him anywhere near Rukia. To her, it was both endearing and daunting. She understood that her brother was trying to protect her from Ichigo because he thought the 'brat' had recently upset her, but she's an adult  _with_  an adult daughter now. She knew how to take care of herself.

Rukia sighed. She would need to speak to Ichigo eventually. Just not right now when everything was still so raw and she didn't know how to face him. She didn't know what to say to him. Forty-eight years is a long time. No, actually it wasn't a long time by  _shinigami_  standards. The problem was with the events that had happened that changed everything between them.

Shutting her eyes, she inhaled deeply.  _Please, Ichigo. Give me a bit more time. I'll see you when I'm ready,_  she pleaded mentally.

As if he had heard her, the shouting stopped. She sat still on her  _futon_ , waiting for  _kami_ -knows-what, not daring to release her  _reiatsu_  to check if he was still within the premise.

A moment later, she heard a servant knocked on her door and called, "Rukia- _sama_."

She got up slowly to slide open the  _shoji_  door of her room and released the breath she didn't know she was holding when she saw that the servant was alone.

"Rukia- _sama_ , this was delivered for you by Kurosaki- _sama_ ," the servant said with a deep bow, handing her a box.

Rukia carefully took it from the  _kimono_ -clad girl and mumbled a quick ' _arigatou_ ' before shutting her door.

She brought the box to a  _chabudai_  and placed it on the surface, staring at it as she sat down on the  _zabuton_.

Removing the lid, she found a piece of note placed on top of a familiar piece of drawing. She recognised it as one of her old doodles from the time she was attending Karakura High School.

 _Had these made according to your hideous drawing before I came over_ , said the note.

Rukia's eyebrows creased as she folded the note and peered into the box. Lying in there were two stuffed toys: a scowling bear with bright orange hair and a raven-haired bunny with a mischievous smile.

* * *

"Dude," Ichigo huffed, pivoting to avoid Renji's  _katana_  from hitting his forearm before he attempted to strike the redhead's open torso.

"What?" Renji exhaled, parrying his friend's hit with a flick of his wrist.

Bringing his sword outwards before the  _katana_  could even manage to make contact with it, Ichigo whined, "This is boring." He swung his weapon counter-clockwise to strike his opponent's right shoulder.

"I don't care," Renji hissed at the slicing pain. "You're not releasing your  _shikai_."

"Oh, come on. You're going to die if we keep this up."

"No, I'm going to die if we  _don't_  keep this up."

Another strike from Ichigo, and Renji could feel the blood trickling down his side. This was not going well for the  _shinigami_  who was supposed to have a couple of centuries of experience at  _zanjutsu_. It's embarassing. But sparring in Soul Society was different from sparring in the human world, especially where Ichigo's massive amount of  _reiatsu_  was concerned. Back at the human world, they had spiritual pressure limiter to keep his at bay. In Soul Society, his  _shikai_  could be deadly seeing as he hadn't been controlling it on his own in almost fifty years. Renji did not want to risk any destructions at the Sixth Division training ground before Kurotsuchi- _taichou_  gave Ichigo a 'checkup'. Ise- _fukutaichou_  made an appointment for the new transfer to see the 12th Division captain tomorrow. They couldn't have a loose canon running around the Seireitei.

"I managed to get the servants to pass her the gift," Ichigo said between strikes.

Renji scoffed, "Didn't take you for a gift person."

"I just wanted to get something nice for her from the human world. It's been a while since she's been there."

"You didn't get  _me_  anything," Renji mockingly pouted.

"Are you serious? You go there every month. And you're not..." Ichigo abruptly stopped mid-speech.

Still struggling to block the slashes, Renji urged, "I'm not...?"

"Nothing."

The  _fukutaichou_  held out his free hand and took a couple of steps back to indicate that he wanted to rest. "You need to see her."

"I'm not allowed to," Ichigo said, sheathing his sword.

"Have you tried talking to  _Taichou_? I know he refuses to let you go anywhere near her. Not sure what that's all about, though. But maybe if you personally asked him, he would let you talk to her," Renji reasoned.

Running a hand through his unruly hair, Ichigo sighed. "I just got here yesterday. If I were to get an audience with that stick-up-the-arse brother of hers, I would have to make serious preparations for it."

"You're afraid of Kuchiki Byakuya?" Renji taunted.

"I am  _not_  afraid of Byakuya but I just know he's going to go  _bankai_  on my arse, one way or another," the orange haired man replied.

Renji nodded as he plopped himself on the floor. "You could always try to get to her through Ichika," he suggested.

Settling on the floor as well, Ichigo placed the  _katana_  beside him before asking, "Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Encouraging me to..." Ichigo furrowed his brows, uncertain of what this was.

Renji rested his elbows on his knees. "We dated once, you know? For two years."

"And then?" There was a trace of jealousy in Ichigo's voice.

"It was after that first time we went to visit the human world. She wanted to make our engagement work. I think she was trying to get over you and move on. We both tried. But I broke it up on our 2nd anniversary. The engagement, too. I could see that there was no way she would see me as more than a childhood friend. So I let her go. And that's why I'm  _encouraging_  you, as you put it."

Ichigo regarded his friend with a contemplative eye. He had always known that Renji held deep feelings for the midget. It probably started over a hundred years ago when they were still roving souls in Inuzuri but he never dared to tell her. She must've have noticed it enough to give their relationship a try. Ichigo scoffed inwardly. It was so obvious, actually, that even Byakuya must have seen it, too.

When Ichigo remained quiet, Renji continued, "I want her to be happy, Ichigo. She has been anything but that since after the war. I don't know why the two of you decided to go your separate ways but I'm pretty sure you still love her like you did before."

Ichigo smirked, "Damn, didn't take you for someone capable of spouting sappy shit."

The redhead scowled at him. "I'm just warning you in a very subtle way, arsehole. If you don't make her happy, I'm coming after you."

"Wow, big talk. How many times have you tried and failed to beat me?" Ichigo scorned. Renji had grown more powerful over the years but he still couldn't get past the 'instant'  _shinigami_.

"We shall see about that! If I win, you talk to  _Taichou_. If you win, you go through Ichika. How about that?" Renji dared.

"What?" Ichigo chuckled. "What sort of a challenge is that? Either way I'm still getting the girl."

"Now, who's the one with the big talk? How would you know if she still wants you? Don't forget we went out for two years."

Ichigo snorted, "And  _we_  had Ichika."

"So? It could've been just a drunken night, for all we know."

Renji did not even see the blur of orange that bolted right at him, sending his back crashing to the floor. When he looked up, it was Ichigo's face hovering over his. "I wouldn't do that to her," he snarled, his hand was around his friend's throat. "If I had known much earlier that we had a child together, I would've left my human life to be with them. But no one told me." With one last shove, Ichigo got off Renji and sat down next to him. "I thought you were married. I thought Ichika was yours. None of you had the right to keep that from me but you did."

The man, who was already battered from the sword fight, struggled to get up with a grunt. Ichigo reached out to help him but his arms were slapped away. When he managed to sit upright, Renji said, "The two of you are the biggest idiots ever existed. You need to stop fooling around and patch things up."

Ichigo sighed. "That's what Kazui said."

"He definitely did not get his smarts from you," Renji jeered at his old comrade. "Forget about the duel. I need to get myself fixed by Kotetsu- _taichou_. I've lost to you a long time ago, anyway."

The man only had himself to blame for not getting to his childhood friend first. He had more than a hundred years of friendship with her but he didn't do anything about it. The moment he saw the way Rukia looked at Ichigo back when they were living in the human world, he knew he had lost his chance. Even those two years dating her didn't gain him the edge on Ichigo. Over the years, Rukia kept saying she had moved on and gotten over the demi- _shinigami_. He never believed it, though, because the way she would sometimes stare at her daughter told him that she was longing for Ichigo to be with her.

"So, who's it going to be?  _Taichou_  or Ichika?" he asked.

Ichigo shrugged. "I will have to face both of them eventually. Have you found out if Ichika knows about me?"

"Nope. Why don't you go ask her yourself? Forge a new father-daughter bond or something. You're going to need it."

Ichigo chuckled. "Yeah, it'll probably be easier to approach her first before my confidence get shot down to the ground by that arrogant Kuchiki."

Just then, Renji's eyes widened as he looked over Ichigo's shoulder.

"Wha-? Oh…"

" _Chire_ , Senbonzakura..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know... No IchiRuki interaction yet. But I need these two to reconcile and have some kind of closure with the people who play crucial parts in their lives first. I want them to come to know all the things that were hidden from them all these years. We have seen:
> 
> 1\. Rukia and Ichika
> 
> 2\. Rukia and Kazui
> 
> 3\. Rukia and Byakuya
> 
> 4\. Rukia and Orihime  
> (The other way around, through the letter, while Rukia is wallowing in guilt on her part of the reconciliation process which is the one that's killing her because Orihime is dead and there's no way she could properly set things right with her so it's going to take much longer and I know you're all especially pissed off at Orihime now because of this. Sigh... I really did not mean to make her look so bad.
> 
> 'Her ineffectiveness in the moment is just an indictment of her supposed resolve and revelation that her intention to do all this to protect her friends wound up doing anything but. (To be fair: she's 16.)'
> 
> The above was written by gunnerpalace on tumblr in one of his analyses with regards to Bleach, and this particular piece is his hypothesis on Orihime in the Hueco Mundo Arc during Ichigo's hollowfication.
> 
> I suppose in this fanfic, she is again, '[doing] all this to protect her friends' – mostly Ichigo, but she 'wound up doing anything but'. So I hope you would excuse her character. She is just Orihime.)
> 
> 5\. Rukia and Renji  
> (Indirectly, in their two-year relationship and a bit more in the sparring.)
> 
> 6\. Ichika and Kazui
> 
> 7\. Ichigo and Isshin  
> (Several times because Ichigo needs a hit on the head from his dad, several times.)
> 
> 8\. Ichigo and Kazui
> 
> 9\. Ichigo and Uryuu
> 
> 10\. Ichigo and Renji, in this chapter
> 
> Ichigo has two other people to confront – Ichika and Byakuya, which we will see in the next chapter. 
> 
> I promise you IchiRuki after that. 


	18. Chapter 17: Fighting over a girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo gets shredded by pink petals.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

_"_ Chire _, Senbonzakura..."_

Millions of glowing  _sakura_  petals floated in the air between the  _shikai_  wielder and his target – the man who impregnated his little sister 49 years ago.

"Do  _not_  activate yours, Ichigo," Renji warned from behind the recent migrant.

Ichigo's fist tightened around the hilt of his sword as he kept his eyes on Byakuya's hand, which was holding his bladeless  _katana_. "Then, what am I supposed to do? Let myself get chewed by flowers? That's going to be embarrassing," he said, grinding his teeth at the words.

"I don't care. Ise- _fukutaichou_..."

"Kurosaki Ichigo." And there it was – the voice of thunder before the floral storm.

Ichigo huffed, "Byakuya."

"We shall begin."

"Begin what?"

Ichigo could see that the petals were restless. They needed somewhere to go. They were just waiting for Byakuya to flick his wrist in the direction he wanted them to attack. Knowing Byakuya, he wouldn't strike a defenceless opponent.

"Don't test my patience, boy," Byakuya snarled, in a Kuchiki Byakuya way – the usual stoic, aristocratic expression still in his voice and on his face.

"I can't," Ichigo finally said, unsure if he should take being called 'boy' as an insult or a compliment. He was, after all, a 66-year-old man. He felt his fingers itching towards his  _katana_  but he had already been warned against summoning his  _shikai_  until he had seen Kurotsuchi, and the wrath of Ise Nanao was the last thing he wanted to deal with. That female  _shinigami_  could be worse than the late Unohana- _taichou_.

Byakuya sent the petals at him anyway. Guess he didn't care that his opponent was defenceless; especially because said opponent was Kurosaki Ichigo  _who impregnated his sister 49 years ago_.

Renji watched his friend  _shunpo_  away from his captain's pretty weapons. It  _was_  kind of embarrassing – an overgrown man getting chased by flowers. He sighed and crawled to a corner of the training ground.  _Sorry, man. I don't think I'm allowed to help you with this one,_  he thought. He could barely help himself. Ichigo had really done a number on him.  _Without_  his  _shikai_. Speaking of embarrassment…

"Byakuya, could we just talk like well-educated, civil adults?" Ichigo yelled over the sound of sharp petals slicing through his skin. He didn't want to fight because it would not solve anything. He wanted to talk because he wanted to see Rukia. It didn't matter if she still had feelings for him. He just wanted them to start over; at least be friends again.

Another graceful swipe of Byakuya's sword sent the petals nipping at Ichigo. The orange-haired  _shinigami_  leapt above the pink dots swarming like bees towards him. This fight with the cherry blossoms gave him a feeling of nostalgia. The first time it happened, he was here to save Rukia. He recalled the smile she gave him after that which was the reason why he wanted so much to save her.

_Who am I kidding? It_ does _matter if she still has feelings for me,_  he told himself. He wanted to see that smile again, and he wanted to be the reason for it. Disregarding the painful piercing of the tiny swords through his skin – blood spraying out of every cut, Ichigo flash-stepped towards Byakuya.

The flower wielder's eyes widened when he realised a little too late how fast Ichigo was charging in his direction and how the former  _ryoka_  had come to invade his  _mushoken_  – the woundless zone that was within 85cm radius of his personal space. His astoundment caused him to lose control of his  _zanpakutou_ ; the petals immediately dropping to the ground behind Ichigo like dry leaves.

Hands on his knees, Ichigo tried to catch his breath and continued to ignore the pain around his body. He looked up at Byakuya who was staring back at him, his eyes unreadable as usual.

"What do you know about being educated and civil," he scoffed as his  _zanpakutou_  reverted to its passive state. "I have nothing to say to you, Kurosaki Ichigo."

"But I have something to say to you. I want to see Rukia," Ichigo said, his heartbeat gradually returning to normal.

"No."

Ichigo stood upright, wincing as the fabric of his  _shihakusho_  slid across his wounds with every movement. "Why not?"

"You have caused her too much trouble in the past," Byakuya replied.

"You mean, Ichika?" Ichigo deadpanned.

Byakuya narrowed his eyes at the mention of his niece's name. He then, threw a heated glare at the redhead who was almost curled up at the far end of the training ground. Renji felt a chill running down his spine. Of course, he would be the first suspect.

"I found out from my adopted son. Ichika went to see him," Ichigo was quick to clarify. He didn't want his friend to get into trouble with his captain.

_Bastard..._  Renji scorched a scowl at the blazing orange.  _Why did he ask me if Ichika knew about him, then?_

"Hn." Byakuya returned to glowering at the man directly in front of him. He thought about the state his sister was in and realised that Rukia never really did tell him why she was depressed. She only said she had ruined many lives. As much as he hated to admit it, Ichigo could possibly be the one who could snap her out of her self-reproach. He had done it before.

Ichigo might not have been the sharpest tool in the shed but even he could tell that Byakuya's resolve at keeping him away from his sister was wavering.

"When I said trouble, I was not implying Ichika in any way," the clan head began. "That niece of mine is her mother's hope and joy. If it were not for you, Rukia would not have conceived her. Only noble souls are capable of pro-creating, and Rukia certainly does not possess the noble blood."

Ichigo felt smug about it but he wasn't going to show it. He had a feeling he was closer to getting what he was asking for. And being a smart arse would probably ruin his chance.

"You are allowed to see Rukia," Byakuya continued. "But only if she is willing to see you."

* * *

"Renji- _san_ ," Ichika greeted as she slid open the door to her living quarters at the Second Division. Ever since her promotion as a  _fukutaichou_ , she had moved out of her mother's place at the 13th Division. Rukia herself, finding it rather lonely there sometimes, would spend her weekends at the Kuchiki manor these days.

Renji stepped inside the home that used to be resided by Omaeda Marechiyo, the former  _fukutaichou_  of the Second Division. After the war with the Quincy, the Onmitsukido Corps had decided to take Omaeda out of the Second Division so he could completely focus on the Patrol Corps section of the Onmitsukido as its commander. They needed to increase the security at the Seiretei in case a threat like Yhwach showed up again.

Ichika was the perfect candidate to take his place as a  _fukutaichou_  under Sui-Feng- _taichou_ , who had considered the girl as her star apprentice. The captain always thought Ichika reminded her of someone.  _"As much as I hate that ryoka boy, he used to be one of those rare cases who became powerful very fast and took all his battles seriously. You seem to resemble him in that way, Ichika-_ chan _," Sui-Feng had said during one of their meetings._  The young girl had never seen Kurosaki Ichigo fight before. She couldn't picture herself being similar to him in any way. In fact, her captain's words made her feel awkward.

"Are you free this evening, Ichika?" Renji asked, looking around the living room before settling his gaze on the girl who took his name.

"I just got back but I don't have any appointments later," she replied.

"Want to take a walk with your old  _Ji-san_?"

Ichika nodded with an excited look, taking the arm Renji offered. When she was a little girl, the redhead would take her out on walks to the Rukongai so Rukia could get her paperwork done.

It was during one of these walks when the five-year-old Ichika brought up the fact that the two of them looked different from each other and wondered if he really was her father. Surprised and not knowing what to do, Renji had taken her back to her mother who had confirmed Ichika's suspicion. When she asked who her biological father was, Rukia explained that she couldn't find out or she would be taken away. That was the first and only time Renji saw fear in Ichika's eyes. She clung to her mother tightly and told her she promised she would never ask again because she didn't want to be separated from Rukia. It was a heart-wrenching sight. The petite  _shinigami_  who was still the  _fukutaichou_  of the 13th Division then, had tried to lay the news on the girl as gently as she could but it was a scary thing for a little girl to find out at that age.

Renji and Ichika settled themselves on the grass when they reached an open field somewhere between the Seireitei and the First District. Far out ahead of them, the sky seemed to have connected with the green grass at the horizon. Except for the sight of a roof about a quarter of a mile away, this whole place was just a vast empty piece of land.

"You know about Ichigo." Renji voiced, breaking the silence.

Ichika sighed. "Yes, Renji- _san_.  _Okaa-san_  told me about it last year."

"You don't want to see him?" he asked.

"I want to," she said. "I've told you before, remember? That I've always wanted to know whom my real father was. And now that I do, I'm not sure if  _Okaa-san_  would be okay with me going to see him. She's been so down lately. I don't want to add to her anxiety."

"He has been trying to talk to her but she's been avoiding him."

Ichika nodded. "I think it's got something to do with Orihime- _san_ 's letter. Kazui told me his mother wrote a letter to  _Okaa-san_  and it was after she had read it that she started closing up."

"You know, there was a time when your mother was caught in a period of guilt after her previous  _fukutaichou_  died," Renji began. "And there was a time when your father was also depressed about the death of his own mother. When the two of them met, they seemed to have filled the void in each other that was caused by their losses. Being together as partners helped wash away their guilt and boost their self-confidence and strength."

Ichika gazed at her father figure. She had never seen him so serious before. "So you think I should talk to Kurosaki- _san_?" she asked.

Renji flinched at the way she addressed her real father. "You're going to have to work on that."

The brunette snickered. "I know. But it'll be weird. I've always felt like I shouldn't be too familiar with him. I couldn't even call him by his first name the way I do with Karin- _obachan_ , Yuzu- _obachan_ , and all the other human friends of yours. I was afraid it would trigger something deep within  _Okaa-san_  and upset her somehow. I didn't know what it was, but I could see it in the way they tried not to be in the same room together, alone or otherwise. When they talked, they wouldn't even engage in any sort of eye contact but they bickered anyway. I thought it was some conflict they had in the past that caused the awkwardness between them. I thought maybe  _Okaa-san_  had visited them because of her human friends and they only put up with each other to keep the peace."

Renji smirked with pride as Ichika spoke. She really was a smart woman. Definitely got that from her mother. Because between him, Strawberry, and Rukia, the short stuff had always been the quick-witted one.

"But now I know. And I'm certain that they really did put with each other to keep the peace. Only that it was the peace among their friends, not between the two of them. I suppose they're given the opportunity to work at it now, if only they could put their stubborn selves aside," Ichika concluded, picking on the blades of grass around her. She used to collect them and line them up on a piece of cloth. Being the hyperactive person that she had always been, she was too restless to get into a  _jinzen_. Somehow lining grass on a cloth and rearranging them to make patterns helped calm her down enough to go into meditation. That's how she first got to contact her  _zanpakutou_  earlier on in her Academy days.

"He wants to see you," Renji said.

"Is that why you brought me here?" Ichika smiled, nodding at the building structure up ahead.

Renji chuckled. "Nothing gets by you, Ichika- _fukutaichou_."

Ichika joined in the laughter, leaning her head on Renji's shoulder. Her surrogate father wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close to him. "Are you going to be all right with this?" she asked, her voice almost inaudible.

The redhead placed a fatherly kiss on her forehead. "Remember our talk after that argument you had with your mother about that guy classmate of yours?"

Ichika groaned in annoyance, " _Now,_  I do." A senior male student whom she had had a huge crush on had asked her out when she was in her third year at the academy. Rukia did not allow her to go, resulting in a huge squabble between the mother and the daughter. When Ichika stormed out of their home, she ran into Renji, who helped convince Rukia that it would be all right and he would chaperone their date. Of course, he didn't deliver his part of the deal. Instead, he had told Ichika and the boy that he trusted them and would leave them alone as long as they promised to behave. Their relationship didn't work out, and as expected, Renji didn't have to do anything about the boy because Ichika had set the poor guy's  _kimono_  on fire with a medium-level  _hado_  combined with her  _zanpakutou_ 's black flame.

Renji smirked. "I've probably never been anywhere near what a father should be to you. I'm more like an uncle, your mother's brother. The cooler one, of course. Not the uptight, 'thou shalt obey my rules' one."

The girl laughed aloud as the image of Byakuya crossed her mind.

"But, you will always be my little girl. Even if you have to change your family name some time in the future. You were Abarai Ichika first," he said, giving her shoulder a squeeze.

"You know biologically, I was a Kurosaki first, right?" Ichika taunted, nudging her elbow at his side.

"Tsk." Renji rolled his eyes. "You're just like your parents. Always out to spoil the moment. And no, biologically, you're in fact, a Shiba. Your grandfather decided to take his wife's name when he exiled himself to the human world."

Ichika sighed, "That is going to take some serious getting used to on my part. I'm a confused child."

"You'll live, I'm sure. You're crazy enough," Renji said, ruffling the ponytail that was similar to his.

"Hmph..."

* * *

"Well, look what we have here? My newly-discovered  _mei-chan_  coming home to have dinner. You are going to love my cooking, unlike your easily-bored  _Otou-san_  who has been spoiled by his sister's home-cooked meals," Kuukaku welcomed Ichika with open arms when the latter arrived at the Shiba home.

Taken aback by the familial gesture, Ichika patted the back of her aunt awkwardly while struggling to breathe as she was crushed into the generous bosom. " _Konbawa_ ,  _oba-san_."

"Let her go, Kuukaku- _san_. You're suffocating the girl," Ichigo said from behind the older woman.

She rolled her eyes as she let Ichika go. "She's a Shiba. She wouldn't die easily."

Ignoring his cousin, Ichigo flashed a small smile at the brunette. "Yo."

" _K-konbawa_ , K-kuro..." she stuttered.

"Ah..." Ichigo interrupted, rubbing the back of his neck. He knew it would be awkward for Ichika at the moment. He turned his gaze towards the guy behind his daughter. "Thanks for bringing her here, Renji."

The redhead nodded, smirking at the father and daughter. "See you around, squirt," he said, lightly pressing Ichika's head with his big palm.

The younger  _fukutaichou_  gave him a nervous smile, watching her adoptive father flash-step away from the manor.

"Okay, I'm not going to interfere with your reunion. You can even stay the night here,  _mei-chan_. Plenty of room in this house. The old man likes to provide accommodation for people, as always," Kuukaku said before she left the two alone at the doorway.

Ichigo jerked his head at the inside of the house. "Come on in and make yourself at home."

A few minutes later, Ichika found herself in a small dining room with a low table enough for four people. Ichigo came in with a huge tray of food prepared by Kuukaku. She felt at home immediately when she watched him sit across from her and began placing the dishes on the table like what she would usually see a servant in the Kuchiki household do.

Ichigo raised his brows when he caught her smile. "Something amuses you?" he asked.

The girl's throat rumbled a nervous snigger. "Yeah, because you shouldn't be serving your guests. You're the heir to a noble clan. And by protocol, I should be the one serving you."

Pausing his task, Ichigo tilted his head and eyed sideways at his daughter. "Are you lecturing me about how to behave as a noble?"

"Uh..." she stammered.

Ichigo chuckled. "I'm just kidding, Ichika. I don't remember you being so rigid when you visited us in the human world."

Ichika sighed in relief. She had never experienced what a real father was. According to Kazui, Ichigo was always very stern with him. "Sorry, Kuro... err,  _Otou-san_. I'm sorry I need to get used to this. I know it's only right that I should address you appropriately."

"It's fine. I don't expect anything like that from you. And I understand. This is all very new to me, too. And if you're not comfortable at any time, you have to tell me. I'm not the kind of noble person who would shut you up for being disrespectful," Ichigo said, placing their bowls of rice on the table.

Ichika smiled as she clasped her hands together and bowed. " _Itadakimasu_ ," she exclaimed before picking up her bowl and chopsticks.

The father and daughter enjoyed their meal with an easy conversation, mostly about Ichika's experience as a Shinō Academy student and a  _shinigami_.

After the dinner, Ichigo showed her around the Shiba estate where the small temporary clinic was located next to a Japanese garden for the patients to have a walk in while waiting. There was a big building under-construction, separated by a fence, which Isshin would later turn into a medical centre.

"You are a totally different class of nobles," Ichika commented as they walked across a small bridge in the middle of the garden. "It defies everything I learnt from the Kuchiki clan."

Ichigo snorted. "Those elders..."

They stopped at the top of the bridge, overlooking the  _koi_  pond beneath them. "I hate them," she blurted. "I heard they treated  _Okaa-san_  like trash when she first came into the clan. But she hardly ever complains about the pressure they still put on her. When I was born, they didn't want to accept me. If not for Byakuya- _ojisan_  and Renji- _san_ ,  _Okaa-san_  wouldn't have been able to keep me."

Ichigo's fist clenched over the railing of the bridge. He resented the Elders of the Kuchiki clan. But more than anything, he hated himself for not being here for Rukia when she was fighting to keep Ichika. "I wish I was around for the both of you," he muttered.

" _Okaa-san_  told me why you couldn't be here. It seemed as if you were both tricked by fate," she remarked, giving the man next to her a sympathetic gaze.

Ichigo smiled sadly at her. "Can't change the past. But I hope I'll be able to make it up to you and your mother soon.  _If_  she would let me."

"I don't know what's gotten her so upset," Ichika said, deciding not to mention Orihime's letter to him. " _Oji-san_  told me she's blaming herself for ruining some people's lives. I'm not sure what he means but he said you might be able to get her out of it."

Ichigo narrowed his eyes, feeling skeptical about what the girl just said. "Which Oji-san do you mean now? It's not Byakuya, right?"

Ichika snickered and her father noticed that she got her smile from her mother. "I  _do_  mean Byakuya- _ojisan_."

"No way..."

She nodded, still laughing.

"Did you drug him or something?"

"If he were under the influence, then it would make his statement all the more true, don't you think?"

Ichigo scoffed.

A few moments of comfortable silence later, Ichika said she needed to head home and turn in for the night. As much as she would love to take up Kuukaku- _obasan_ 's offer to stay the night, she must go back to her barracks, as she would have an early start the next day.

"I'll walk you home," Ichigo proposed.

The girl nodded and they both took a slow walk back to the Second Division barracks as Ichigo told her stories of how he used to walk back to the Kurosaki Clinic with her mother after school, and how they would get into petty arguments all the way home. He realised how he had missed those days when she would kick and scream at him. And those drawings… And her climbing up to his bedroom window… And how she used to shove his  _shinigami_  form out of his body with that glove…

"Thank you, erm...  _Tou-san_ , for the dinner and for bringing me home," Ichika said, breaking his reverie as they neared the entrance of her quarters.

Ichigo nodded, secretly feeling elated about the way she had addressed him. "It was a pleasure having you over. We should definitely do this again. You can drop by any time. The Shiba manor is your home, too. Your  _sofu_  would've gone crazy if he had known you were coming over."

"Where is he, anyway?" Ichika asked with a chuckle.

"He's back at the human world for a while. He misses the twins and their families," Ichigo replied.

The  _fukutaichou_  nodded. They were right in front of her door now. "Well,  _oyasumi-nasai_ ,  _Tou-san_ ," she said with a bow.

" _Oyasumi-nasai_ ," Ichigo nodded.

Before Ichika had even touched the  _shoji_  door, it slid open to reveal her mother at the doorway in her usual rigid stance and expressionless face.

"Where were you, Ichika?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Somebody posted once that 'Ichika' also means 'strawberry' or something like that. I don't know how I would feel about my wife naming our son after another man she shared her soul with once upon a time. I think it would be a huge blow to my ego. Sorry, Ren. Kubo fucked you up. He even muted you in 686.


	19. Chapter 18: The Sokyoku Hill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A long-awaited confrontation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

 

_"_ _Where were you, Ichika?"_

" _Okaa-san_..." Ichika gasped.

Rukia crossed her arms over her chest, her eyes travelled to and fro between the two people standing outside Ichika's residence.

"What are you doing here?" she asked the male  _shinigami_.

"I'm just dropping Ichika off after dinner at my place," he replied steadily.

Rukia glanced at her daughter. "You didn't tell me you had an appointment with him."

Ichigo scowled at the displeasure in her voice. "Isn't she adult enough to make her own decisions?"

"She's my daughter. I wanted to take her out for dinner but I found her missing when I came to look for her," she replied.

" _Okaa-san_..."

"Don't you have that thing called a  _jigokucho_  you could use to find out where she is?"

" _Otou-san_..."

Upon hearing the way Ichika addressed Ichigo, Rukia pursed her lips and sent a soft glare at him. "Thank you for bringing her home. You may leave."

Ichika glanced timidly at her father who stared back at the small woman with her intimidating stance.

"Please leave, Kurosaki. I need to speak with my daughter," Rukia said, quietly.

Ichigo continued to regard her in silence for a moment before he nodded and turned to walk away in reluctance.

* * *

As she exited her daughter's home after a brief chat, she felt a jolt as the edges of her  _reiatsu_  was gently brushed with another, beckoning her towards its owner.

Inhaling deeply, Rukia shut her eyes to let her senses guide her to where the other spiritual energy was tugging at hers. "The Sokyoku Hill," she whispered before she flash-stepped to that place she hardly visited anymore. Almost 50 years ago, this was the place where she broke the news of the sealing of the  _senkaimon_  to him.

_"_ _Promise me you won't freak out?" she requests._

_He scoffs. "When you ask me that, it simply means you know I will freak out. I can't promise you anything, then. What is it?"_

_She drags out a breath, steadies herself, and says, "Kyouraku-_ soutaichou _has issued a decree to seal the_ senkaimon _tomorrow."_

_He furrows his brows as he looks at her. "Meaning?"_

_She touches a palm to his face. "Ichigo, they are ceasing all travels between the human world and the Seireitei after you leave."_

_"_ _For how long?" he asks, his voice trembles a little. From the look on her face, he already knows this is going to have a horrible impact on their relationship._

_"_ _No one knows yet. It is to prevent Yhwach's deadly_ reiatsu _from going across to your world," she replies._ Your world _, she says. Because that's how it is, still. They are both from two separate worlds. The man who wanted to merge those two worlds, they had already had him killed._

_Ichigo shakes his head very slowly, it almost looks like he doesn't move at all. "The guy is dead. I'm sure his_ reiatsu _will eventually die with him."_

_"_ _Yes, it will. But what's left of him is huge and it's scattered all over the Seireitei. It will take many, many years for it to completely die off. And because Seireitei is struck so bad, it'll take even longer for that to happen," Rukia explains._

_"_ _So, what now? I'm not allowed to come back here to visit you?"_

_"_ _I'm sorry," she chokes._

_He takes her hands in his. "I'm going to find a way to come back. It's what I always do."_

_"_ _Ichigo..." She draws his hands up to her lips and kisses his fingertips. This time she can feel the stinging in her eyes. It is so hard. They are both trying to stay calm. Ichigo is trying to think of a solution. But she knows there isn't any except to wait it all out. "I know it's not going to be easy. But I need you to do something for me."_

_He swallows. He doesn't nod. He knows Rukia is going to suggest something incredulous._

_"_ _Please go home and live a normal life. You deserve that. You don't even have to be a_ shinigami _anymore. There will be some Visored stationed there to perform_ konso _. The Arrancar has agreed not to enter the human world anymore and feed only on the souls that are sent to Hueco Mundo. A small gateway to cross over here will be built but it is only for those plusses with very little_ reiatsu _. So, don't even think of dying prematurely to get here. That gateway won't be able to hold yours," she pleads._

_He takes his hands back and folds his arms across his chest. He wants to shut her out because he cannot accept what she is telling him to do. "What normal life? Right now, this is the only life I know that's normal to me. How long did they say it would take for that damn energy to disappear, Rukia?"_

_"_ _Maybe even a hundred years." She, too, crosses her arms. She does it to prevent her walls from crumbling. She can almost hear the cracks now._

_"_ _No," he says defiantly. "I'm sure Mayuri will come up with something."_

_"_ _He is trying to but it will take time. We need to repair his lab before he can start his research. And even if there is a way he can speed it up, it'll still probably take one lifetime of yours before the_ senkaimon _can be opened again." She grips the sleeves of her_ shihakusho _._

_"_ _I cannot live like that. I cannot go back and think everything is okay when I know I may not see you again. If that's the case, I'd rather stay here."_

_Why is he so stubborn? Then again, it is this part of his character that attracts her to him. He is always so determined, so persuasive._

_She smiles but her lips twitch as she tries to hold back a sob. "You're not dead yet, idiot. You can't stay here. It will interfere with the balance of souls. Besides, your sisters need you. Our friends need you. You need to go home," she pauses as her voice begins to quiver. "Continue your studies. Get a job. Date. Marry a human girl. Have a bunch of kids and live till you're old and grey before you die a happy death."_

_A tear escapes Ichigo's eye. It's not fair. They just started this thing that they have always wanted. Their promise. Their covenant. Why is fate such a cruel thing? "You're asking too much of me, Midget," he says through gritted teeth._

Rukia stepped onto the familiar plane on top of the hill where she was once condemned to die. She often wondered what would've happened if the orange-haired hero never showed up to intercept her execution. That same orange-haired hero who had defeated Aizen. The same orange-haired hero who had destroyed Yhwach. The same orange-haired hero she had fallen for once upon a time. The same orange-haired hero who had proposed to her even when he knew they couldn't be together. That same orange-haired hero who's standing at the edge of the hill, whose  _reiatsu_  had called for her to come to him in this very place where he knew she used to find peace.

She stood at quite a distance behind him, not trusting herself not to break down if she got any closer. She had missed seeing him like that; the wind ruffling his long mane and the black  _shihakusho_  that he always looked so at home in. She hadn't noticed how he looked earlier tonight when he had dropped Ichika off at her home.

The slim but well-built, tall figure turned around to smirk at her. "Hey."

Rukia crossed her arms over her chest, her fingers fiddled with the fabric of her white  _haori_. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she returned, "Hey."

Ichigo's lips tilted a bit as he started to move closer to her, but her rigid posture stopped him a few feet away. His  _reiatsu_  once again reached out to her even though hers was keeping still around her form. "I'm glad you came. It's good to see you again."

Rukia nodded as her searching eyes glanced around him before returning to his serene features, which ironically looked more alive than when he was still human. She had not seen him like that in a long time. This was the look of the old Ichigo who had just returned from a mission of some sort with relief that the threat had been taken care of and people were safe again.

"Sit down with me," he said. As always, he never asked. It was always an invitation. Because he knew she could never turn him down.

The two sat beside each other, Ichigo with his knees propped up and Rukia in a  _seiza_ , with the slippers – which she had removed from her feet – to cushion her knees from the rough surface of the ground. For a long moment, they enjoyed the familiar silence from years ago. Ichigo had not planned his speech because he thought he never needed to, with Rukia. Even if they were to stare out into the distance under the starless sky with only the sound of the cool breeze rustling past them the entire night, it would've been enough for him. He missed this. He missed them. He missed her.

"I'm sorry," she exhaled.

Ichigo turned his head to gaze at the woman beside him.

"For not telling you about Ichika," she continued. "I know it wasn't fair to you that I kept it to myself but I couldn't tell you when I heard you were happily married with your own kid."

"You know you got two things wrong in that sentence, right?" he snorted.

She huffed, "I know now that Kazui isn't your son."

"And that I wasn't exactly happy."

Rukia pursed her lips, unsure of what to say to that.

"I'm sorry, too. I should've waited," said Ichigo.

"We didn't know."

"Ishida said I should have had faith."

"He's only saying that because Orihime chose to marry you."

"I asked her to."

"So did he."

"How did you know?"

Rukia decided not to answer his question. Orihime's letter in the pocket of her haori was weighing her down. She had been carrying it around with her – a reminder of the part she played in her friends' empty marriage. "Why did you do it?" she asked. "Of all the human girls in the world, why did you marry her when you knew you could never love her?"

Ichigo shrugged. "I could never love anyone. Ever. You... I couldn't think straight at that time. I was going crazy, visiting Urahara every other day just to check if he heard anything from you or if there were any news about the situation here letting up. I walked home disappointed all the damn time. So I thought maybe I just had to accept that the gate was never going to open and I would never be able to come here until I've passed on. I thought maybe if I did what you told me to do – if I got married and led a normal life, maybe time would pass me by much faster and I would be able to see you again. That was all I could think of. So when she got pregnant, I thought I'd just adopt the kid. I was messed up. Dad was against it. He told me from the beginning that it would be wrong of me to do it and warned me not to screw things up but I know I did, if Kazui's defiance of me was any indication."

Rukia remained quiet, letting her mind process all his words before she said her piece, "I didn't send you any messages because I couldn't. After Renji and I were engaged, I moved to the Kuchiki house at the Second District where I gave birth to Ichika. We were not allowed to tell anyone that Ichika was yours and the Elders did not want people to make speculations. So we stayed there until the Elders felt that the gossips had died down. Sentarou- _san_  and Renji did all the paperwork at the 13th Division and  _Nii-sama_  oversaw the squad while I was away. When the communication lines between Soul Society and the human world was restored, I was told you were married with a kid. I didn't feel it was right to tell you about Ichika because it would certainly ruin your family."

"Would you have told me about her if you knew why I married Orihime?" he asked.

Rukia let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. "No. Remember that talk we had at the rooftop? I felt that we had made our choices and I really meant it when I told you I was glad you married Orihime. Revealing our secrets then would've made everything complicated. It would've hurt too many people."

Ichigo nodded, not that he agreed that they should've kept all those things from each other but rather that he understood what she meant. "Did you ever find out why we shared the same vision that day?"

Rukia shook her head again. She never brought it up to any of the scientists because she was too afraid of the answer.

"I did," he began. "Yesterday, at my checkup with Mayuri, he asked me if I had encountered anything un-human during my  _reiatsu_  suppression and I told him about what we both saw. He said the vision couldn't have been mine. It was yours. I got a sneak peek of it because our souls were once connected and it happened when we were having an argument. But because my  _reiatsu_  was not active at that time, the level of my  _reiryoku_  was not enough to handle your spiking  _reiatsu_. So I was sent into a trance."

"You said you saw Kazui's hand and a black hole," she reminded.

"I was wrong. I saw a child's hand. Now, that... Now, that I know who Ichika is. I think it was hers. Because the vision was ours. Mayuri said the black hole was our seal of fate."

Silence.

Rukia sighed. "I knew it was Ichika's hand. I'd recognise it anywhere. But I didn't know what that black hole was."

"If we had compared notes, we would've found something," Ichigo commented.

"And what would that have achieved?"

The male  _shinigami_  leaned back with his hands on the ground behind him. "For one thing: a better understanding on my part of where we stood in each other's lives. I thought there was no hope anymore for us, Rukia," he replied, causing her to flinch at the sound of her own name coming from his lips. "When I heard the  _senkaimon_  was going to open much sooner than we expected, I think I had a nervous breakdown. I knew immediately I made the mistake of not waiting. If I had already been uncertain about the choice I made to marry Orihime, I was pretty damn sure, then, that it  _was_  a mistake. My fate of being a human husband and father was sealed because I was being brash again."

Rukia stood up, putting on her slippers and crossing her arms. "I ruined everything for her. I ruined you for her."

"What are you talking about?" Ichigo also got up to his feet. He walked to stand completely in front of her.

"I shouldn't have come into your world. The two of you would've led a perfectly normal life together," Rukia said, still unable to look at his face.

"I don't think so," he disagreed. "I couldn't reciprocate her feelings and she knew that from the beginning of our marriage. She knew my intention to marry her was to help her raise Kazui."

"But if I had never existed in your life, you would've been able to return her feelings," she argued.

"Rukia, I knew her much longer than I knew you. I would've at least liked her way before I met you if I really could return her feelings. But I didn't because I couldn't. I never saw her as anything more than a friend."

"Your feelings could've grown. I was in the way."

Ichigo scoffed, too baffled that she was trying so hard to go against him. He knew she was not that stupid to think he could ever love another. Why was she being so stubborn? "I was a broken person until I met you. I wasn't capable of feeling anything until you came. After the numbness caused by my mother's death, the first feelings I had was directed at you. I was annoyed. I was curious. I was irritated. And then, I was..."

"Overwhelmed by my presence in your life which led to that night and maybe it shouldn't have happened," she summarised for him.

Ichigo crossed his arms; insulted by the way she looked at their relationship. "Are you regretting all that? Those years we were together..."

"We were not together."

"Oh yes, we were."

"We were  _nakama_. We were friends."

"We were never just friends," Ichigo growled, pushing his face forward. "There was always something more between the two of us. You cannot deny that, Rukia. And after all these years, it has not changed one bit. You're shutting yourself in. You're shutting me out. But you cannot ignore what we have."

"How would you know what I am doing?" Rukia tilted her head up, this time she managed to send a challenging glare at him.

"Because I know you," he replied.

"You  _knew_  me," she corrected. "You don't know me anymore. It's been almost half a century since the time you thought you knew me. I've told you this before: people change. I have changed."

Ichigo snorted, shaking his head. "You  _think_  you have changed. Your  _reiatsu_  tells a different story."

"What do you know about what my  _reiatsu_  is saying? You're horrible at reading  _reiatsu_."

"I can read yours just fine. Because it's the only one that ever mattered to me."

Rukia was silenced by his declaration. The memory of her near-death experience in the fight with Aaroniero flashed through her mind.

"Besides, Renji said he had to break up with you because you couldn't focus on him."

"Renji is an idiot!" she snarled, turning her face to the side.

"He's an idiot and so are you. But he's a lot wiser than you," he countered before he sighed, "And I owe that guy a great favour for stepping in for me all these while."

Rukia tugged her bottom lip between her teeth as she swiped at the strip of hair that always hung between her eyes, failing to keep it behind her ears for even a second.

"I still can't believe you were able to keep her from me for so long," Ichigo said quietly.

"I told you we weren't allowed to..."

"I know that. It's just... I should've seen it. The resemblance and all."

Scoffing, she faced him again in disbelief. "Ichika does  _not_  look like you."

"Ichika has the personalities of both Karin and Yuzu. She has my mother's hair colour. I don't mean to burst your bubble but the only thing Ichika got from you is the colour of her eyes," Ichigo chuckled. "And a bit of that Kuchiki training."

The short  _shinigami_  glared at him as she kicked him in the shin.

"Fuck, Rukia! I'm still recovering from your brother's slicing!" he snapped, bending down to rub his sore spot.

Eyes widened, she gasped, "You fought  _Nii-sama_?"

"I didn't even get the chance to. I was not allowed to summon my  _shikai_  before my checkup but he went all  _chire_  at me anyway," he replied, his hands moved in wide gestures to show that the petals had attacked him all over his body.

Her eyes scanned him from head to toe, actually studying him for the first time since she arrived at the hill. She noticed the healing wounds around his neck and the top part of his chest which was not covered by his  _shihakusho_. They were tiny but a lot. There was also a gash across his cheek. She would've seen it if she hadn't avoided looking directly at him. "You didn't get the Fourth to fix you?"

He shook his head. "They were mostly just shallow wounds I got from charging towards his  _mushoken_. Nothing that wouldn't heal in a day or two."

"Why did you let him cut you?"

Ichigo smirked when he caught a hint of concern in those violet eyes. He reached a palm out to touch her cheek but it was quickly slapped away.

"What are you doing?" Rukia asked accusatively.

He scowled as he retrieved his hand, now clenched in a fist. Sighing, he decided to answer her other question. "I didn't want to fight him. I wanted to ask him to let me see you. The guards told me he ordered them not to let me in when I went to the mansion."

She nodded. "The gifts..." she muttered, glancing away from him.

"Don't mention it," he cut her off. "I finally got to get rid of that awful drawing."

Rukia's hand shot up to hit him on the head but he was quick enough to grab her wrist before it reached him. She grunted at his interception, "Let go of me."

Ichigo tightened his hold on her when she tried to twist her hand out of his grasp. She cast another glare at him and brought the other hand up to attack him only to have that one caught as well.

"I said, let go!" she growled, glaring harder at him causing him to chuckle at the sight of her – a  _shinigami_  captain – struggling against him. "It's not funny. Ichigo, please!"

Still keeping her wrists in his grip, the man tensed when she said his name. He lowered their arms and slipped his fingers to intertwine them with hers and pulled her close to him. Rukia was too stunned to fight the motion and soon found herself standing toe-to-toe with him.

"Can we start over?" he murmured as he touched their foreheads together.

Rukia's eyes slid closed, her heart pounding within her chest, and her mind screamed at her to remove herself from him. It wasn't right. His wife had just died not too long ago. What's worse was that for so many years when he was married to Orihime, he couldn't even try to love her because he was still hung up on Rukia. This was all wrong. "I can't," she whispered, shaking her head, taking a step away from him.

Ichigo tightened his fingers around hers, not allowing her to move another inch. "Why not?"

"I cannot get over the fact that I ruined my friends' marriage."

"What are you talking about? Orihime died. It's not like we were divorced or anything."

"But the marriage was not fulfilling for her because you couldn't get over me," she snapped, yanking her hands from him. Immediately missing the warmth, she shoved them into the pockets of her  _haori_. A mistake she made as one of them held Orihime's letter. The corner of the envelope stabbed into her skin as if mocking her.

"Who said it was not fulfilling for her? She knew when we got married that it was only because of Kazui. Yes, that was a mistake that I am fucking sorry I made but she knew I couldn't return her feelings. She told me it didn't matter. She even said she would understand if I wanted to leave when the goddamn gates opened again. You did not ruin anything, Rukia. Stop saying that! You and I hardly even talked when you visited the human world." Ichigo's voice was loud now, echoing across the silence of the midnight.

"She said she was happy but she wasn't. I ripped her off that chance of happiness, Ichigo. She was my friend. She was my comrade. I hurt her. It was clear even in her letter that she was in pain but she kept it to herself."

Ichigo narrowed his eyes at the woman in front of him. "What letter?"

Rukia chewed her lower lip in apprehension. She did not realise she had let it slip.

The orange-haired warrior noticed the tension on her right shoulder and the flinch of her elbow. "Give it to me, Rukia," he ordered, his voice deep and angered. He wanted to know what Orihime wrote that got Rukia rambling all the negative stuff about herself.

She shook her head and took a step back. Ichigo grabbed her elbow to keep her from moving farther away. "No!" she cried, trying to jerk his hand off of her but also not wanting to remove her hand from her pocket for fear that the letter would drop out of it.

Ichigo sighed as his expression softened. "Renji and Ichika told me you've been closing up since you got back from seeing Kazui. So I'm guessing right now that it has something to do with what Orihime wrote. I just want to know what she said that got you all upset."

Rukia's violet eyes searched his blazing amber ones. Seeing the concern in it, she relented and handed the letter to him.

The man regarded the envelope as if it were something that would explode before taking the letter out to read it.

The  _shinigami_  woman remained where she was with her arms crossed, biting the nail of her thumb in uncertainty as she stared off into the distance behind Ichigo. It didn't matter what he thought of the letter. Her emotions were based on the fact that she had anchored Ichigo to herself, preventing him from having the freedom to love other people and in turn, causing hurt to one of their dearest friends. The guilt was still so raw because Orihime was already gone and Rukia felt there was no way she could make it up to her.

She was snapped out of her thoughts at the sound of paper being shredded. "Ichigo!" she shouted angrily as she tried to stop him from tearing the letter.

Ichigo moved abruptly away from her, mumbling something that she couldn't hear. She watched as he placed the shredded pieces of paper on one palm, his eyes locked on hers before a small flame lit up to consume what was once Orihime's letter to Rukia.

She gasped, "How did you..."

He smirked. "I had a lot of time to pick up on some  _kido_  spells after my  _reiatsu_  suppression was lifted. This is one of the very few I can successfully control."

"But that was my letter!" Rukia snapped as her fist connected to his jaw with a hard blow that sent him stumbling backwards a couple of steps. Blood oozed from the laceration on his cheek that was caused by Senbonzakura two days earlier.

He turned back to see Rukia glowering at him in hurt and anger, her fists clenched at her sides. But there was something else behind that hard mask. She looked like she was about to cry. "Rukia..."

"That was the only thing I had left of her," she muttered, blinking away the tears that were threatening to slip out of her eyes.

Ichigo pulled her into his arms, mildly surprised that she didn't resist him this time. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and tucked the crown of her head under his chin, noticing how she was quite a bit taller than before. "I can't let you keep something that would hurt you and deceive you into thinking you did something bad when you didn't."

Rukia sighed, staring at her hands that were fisted on the fabric of his  _shihakusho_. "I don't really know what I'm feeling. There's a lot of guilt, that's for sure. But I think I'm more pissed at how fate has played with all of us after what you did to Yhwach. He was still very much alive, albeit not physically, for many years after the war."

He pulled away from her to gaze into her eyes, still keeping their proximity as his hands came up to cradle her jaw. "It's over, now. Our family can finally be together."

She stared softly back at him before lifting a hand to hover over his cheek where the cut was. She watched as he shut his eyes, leaning his face into the warm energy emitted from her palm that was sealing his wound.

"It's been too long since I've felt this," Ichigo murmured, remembering the times when she used to heal him years ago.

After making sure there was not a trace of the cut left, she lowered her hand, placing it on his chest as she was still trapped within his hold. "Ichika seems accepting of you."

"I hope that's a good thing," he chuckled, thumbing circles on her cheeks.

Rukia lowered her gaze to the white stripes of his black collar, mechanically smoothening out the cloth that covered his chest. "She had always wanted to know who you were. But she was afraid that the Elders would do something separate us."

Ichigo encircled her waist with his arms, pulling her closer to him. "Do you still have that ring I gave you?"

She took one glance at him before she wrapped her slender arms around his torso, laying her head on his chest. "Ichigo..."

"Hm?"

"Give me some time, please. I'm happy you're finally able to come into Ichika's life. But I don't think I can just disregard the past and hop into a relationship with you right now. There are too many things that we should let heal first."

Shutting his eyes, Ichigo tightened his hold around her and swallowed the lump in his throat. It was happening again. Fate kept putting them together only to break them apart, letting them meet again but they could not be together.

No, this time they had eternity. He would make sure fate didn't get in the way again. So...

"I'm going to wait. I don't care how long it'll take for you to come back to me. This time, nothing's going to get in our way, Midget."

Despite herself, Rukia felt herself smiling at his personal nickname for her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will Rukia ever mend her brokenness enough to receive Ichigo again?


	20. Epilogue: The bond that never breaks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time passes...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters. If I did... Never mind…

I step out of the Urahara  _shoten_ , ignoring the noise of those two idiot exiled  _shinigami_  who never seem to grow up. They are teasing me again. It happens every time I come to the world of the living. Looking down one last time at the white sleeveless top and skinny jeans Yoruichi has prepared for my  _gigai_ , I think to myself that at least that's one thing that I approve of.

It has been a hundred years since the human world liaison has been restructured after the last human with spiritual powers died at 90. Renji no longer holds that post because the  _soutaichou_  saw that the hollow activity in Karakura Town has significantly dropped. The Visored are the ones officially in-charged of performing  _konso_  and slaying hollows now. The  _shoten_  is still the communication hub. There are no humans with spiritual powers since Yasutora Sado and Ishida Uryuu have passed on. Thus, Kyouraku- _soutaichou_  assigns one month of each year for every captain to drop by Karakura for an official visit to report on the activities of the Visored and those two perverted  _shinigami_. Every captain, except Kurotsuchi Mayuri, that is. That freak refuses to leave his lab unless something experiment-worthy pops up at the Rukongai.

So here I am, in the month of January. It's my turn to check up on Karakura. I have applied for an extended stay here this year. It's my 320th year of existence so I thought I should give myself some vacation. No one knows, of course. But the  _soutaichou_  understands that I need a break. My official stay is three days. I've only extended a couple of days. So it's not really that much of a difference. No one ever expects that Kuchiki Rukia would know how to slack off. They will think I'm just delayed at coming back because Urahara and Yoruichi are stalling with their reporting – a fact everyone knows by now since every captain has a chance to deal with these two crazies once a year.

I thought I'd do a little self-pampering like having a whole afternoon drinking coffee while reading a book, taking a stroll at the park, treating myself to a nice dinner, going to the movies, and maybe even dropping by Karakura High School for a visit. It's been a while.

A hundred years is such a long time. So many things have changed; their technology for one, and – as I walk around a familiar route that has gotten a lot busier – even their fashion sense. There are more people in casual clothes than before. On this part of Tokyo, that is. Karakura has always been a small town where people are more traditional. Now, even the old people selling sweets and ice-cream at the street stalls are no longer wearing  _yukata_. I see a lot of people talking to themselves.  _Must be some communication device planted in their ears that I can't see._  It's kind of weird, though.

I don't know if I should be surprised but the first place my feet take me is the house where the Kurosaki Clinic used to be.  _Of course, I shouldn't be surprised_ , I mentally snorted. This place marks the big turn in my life 175 years ago. That fateful day when I walked right through the bedroom wall of a 15-year-old human boy who fucking kicked me on the back of my head.

As I approach the building, I could see that the big signboard has been removed. As expected, it's no longer a clinic since the resident doctor had a 'cardiac arrest' many years ago. I wonder who lives there now.

Ichika told me that Kazui never got married. He died, quite tragically, in a car accident. She was heartbroken when she went to perform  _konso_  on him, knowing that she might never see her human best friend again. (Ichigo wanted to do it but Kazui had booked Ichika to be the one sending him off when he first discovered the existence of the  _shinigami_.) They spent an entire afternoon together in their spirit forms. Kazui was not very pleased because he appeared as he was at the prime of his life – 55, when he took over his biological father's company and became the CEO, which was only ten years prior. Ichika, on the other hand, still looked barely 16. An inch before the hilt of Ichika's  _zanpakutou_  touched his forehead, Kazui admitted that he was in love with Ichika for the longest time but didn't want to make things awkward between them because they could never be together.

_"_ _Don't want history to repeat itself," he had said._

_"_ _Bastard!" Ichigo commented when Ichika told us the story over dinner, all while bawling her eyes out. "What did he mean by that?"_

I remember rolling my eyes at the orange-haired idiot sitting across from me, as I rubbed my daughter's back in an attempt to comfort her. I must commend that boy on the wise choice he made.

Back at the old Kurosaki home... From where I stand across the street from their gate, I could see the father sitting at the breakfast table with one of those see-through screens hovering over their food while having his coffee. The mother is rushing her children to get ready for school. And the children – hah, one boy and a pair of twin girls. How familiar.

"Nakamura Michi! Come back here and get your breakfast," the mother calls.

The boy lazily drags himself back into the house and snatches a  _bento_  from his mother as his sisters bump his sides when they run past him.

_Ah... Typical modern Japanese family._

Next destination: the coffeehouse. This  _gigai_  needs some breakfast. I think I'll just spend the entire day binging on cakes and coffee until it is time for that movie. These are things I cannot do in Soul Society, things I've missed about the human world. I'll just take a nice long walk past the park and Karakura High on my way there.

The park is more or less still the same: people jogging, taking their dogs out for walks, mothers strolling with their children who are too young to go to school, and some teen couples in their school uniforms – obviously escaping classes – making out behind trees. I scowl, thinking back on a conversation Isshin had with Ichika some years ago when we dropped by for dinner.

_"_ Otou-san _was a delinquent in school?" Ichika asked incredulously when her grandfather mentioned how Ichigo used to come back home with bruises all over from fights._

_Isshin laughed out loud. "He was more than a delinquent, Ichika-_ chan _. There were rumours that he was a sex addict, always running off during classes with your mother. I had a hard time convincing the principal that my son was a prude virgin."_

_"_ _What the hell are you yapping about, old man?" Ichigo grabbed the collar of his father's shirt to pull him out from the couch and the two started punching each other. As usual, it ended with the losing Shiba hugging the poster of his wife, crying to her about how disrespectful their son was._

_Ichika had a horrified look as she turned to me questioningly with her wide purplish eyes. I was sitting at the dinner table glaring at Karin and Yuzu who were snickering behind their palms across from me while we were preparing the ingredients for dinner._

Yes, we found the twins in the Rukongai after their passing. They ended up within the first 15 districts so it wasn't very hard to look for them. And because they had some high levels of  _reiryoku_ , we were able to recover their memories. They were never ordinary humans anyway, because they were part  _shinigami_.

And I cannot believe Isshin still puts up a big poster of Masaki- _san_  in their home. Then again, I think it's rather sweet that Isshin's love for his wife is eternal. The woman is well-loved in this family. Ichika even tried to curl her hair once so she would look like her grandmother, which she really did.

Speaking of Masaki- _san_ , I visit her grave (and Isshin's) every time I come to the human world. There are not many graveyards around anymore, as most people prefer cremation. The one where Masaki- _san_  lies is the only one that's on top of a hill. This is where I come to for some peace and quiet away from Urahara and Yoruichi.

Moving on...

Karakura High School. I look up at that particular window I scaled to surprise Ichigo when I returned to the human world after he rescued me from my execution. I think that was the time when I fell for the  _bakamono_. Maybe much earlier but I was aware of my feelings for him only then. Like Kazui, I never planned on letting Ichigo know about it. We couldn't be together because we were two worlds apart. So I kept it to myself, although I sometimes suspected he felt the same way. I didn't want to risk it. But after Yhwach, we got to spend more time together alone and I guess, it just couldn't be helped that our feelings for each other would surface. And look how it turned out. How many people got hurt because we chose to develop what we had?

No, I'm still not really over this. I'm not over the fact that Orihime didn't get the life she wanted. I'm not over the fact that the children had to suffer... even though, they did make peace with it later on. Kazui was satisfied with his life when he finally managed to find his real father and they both accepted each other enough to be able to work together. Ichika on the other hand, got the best of both worlds... both fathers, that is. Although one is more like an uncle to her, the other comes with a grandfather, three aunts, and a 'hog wild' uncle – pardon the pun.

Okay, I guess the problem lies with me. I'm the only one still buried under a brick pile of guilt. Even after Ichigo had burnt Orihime's letter, her words still haunt me sometimes.

_I could never replace you in any way, Rukia._

I shake the thoughts out of my head as I walk away from the school towards the coffeehouse I frequent on my visits the past five years I've been here. I am going to enjoy myself today. It may not be the 14th yet –  _Nii-sama_  would never allow me to be away on my birthday – but I am going to give myself a little celebratory outing and there couldn't have been a better place than the human world to do it because I can be myself here. No one will judge me on how I behave, the things I do, or the shopping I'm going to indulge myself in at the Chappy Store tomorrow.

"Black coffee with doughnuts," the cashier confirms my order and I notice the welcoming smile on his face. "Anything else?"

I look to the side where a whole array of cakes and brownies are. I am definitely going to try each one of them. "Maybe later? I'll come back and order some more."

He nods, tapping on the screen in front him before announcing my total. I pay up with the currency I exchanged earlier with Urahara and after getting my receipt, I pick a table by the window in the far corner of the shop.

Two cups of coffee, a tall strawberry milkshake, two doughnuts, a cheesecake, and a walnut chocolate brownie later, I am still enjoying the novel I bought from the bookshop next door earlier. I must have been so engrossed in it that I do not hear it when a man and a woman come to sit at a table a few feet away from mine. It is the sound of their voices that catches my attention, at first.

The man's back is facing me and his tall stature has the woman covered from my view. As I observe them, the man stands up from his seat, probably going to get a napkin or extra sugar and when he turns, I am taken by surprise by the familiarity of his looks. Jet-black hair that reaches the nape of his neck, pale skin, bespectacled, calm demeanour, prim and proper dressing with designer shoes...

My eyes immediately go back to where his table is and sitting there, is a woman with long orange hair, her bangs secured at the side by a flower pin. She has a pretty face, is decently-dressed to cover her huge chest, and she is... scooping red bean paste into their coffee cups?

Before the man returns, she quickly drops the tiny jar into her open handbag and gives him an angelic smile. The man leans over their table and kisses her on her cheek, causing her to blush furiously. Her eyes twinkle as her smile widens and she starts talking animatedly about robots or something.

"They look happy."

I gasp when I hear the familiar voice coming from my own table. "What the hell are you doing here?" I demand in a harsh whisper, gritting my teeth as I face the strawberry head who is sitting across from me. Stupid, stupid strawberry head looking so handsome in his black button down shirt that fits his broad shoulders and toned...  _What is wrong with me?_

He smirks. "Checking me out, Midget?"

_Fucking hell..._

"You wish!" I snap. "Why are you here?"

"I followed you," he says in nonchalance. Of course, Kurosaki Ichigo has always been the most honest man in the world, centuries over.

I cross my arms as I lean back in my chair. "Go back to Soul Society. Don't ruin this for me."

"Ruin what? Your 320th birthday outing?" he chuckles, crossing his arms as well. His rolled-up sleeves revealing the muscles of his forearms as they flex...

Narrowing my eyes, I snarl, "Go away, Strawberry. I want to be alone today."

He shrugs. "Just ignore me then. I'm going to stay whether you want me here or not. Like you, I'm also visiting my hometown."

"Do it some other time. This one's mine."

He ignores me, grabs my milkshake – or what's left of it, and takes a loud sip through the straw. "Gross," he says. His face wrinkles as he places the cup back on the table. "I don't understand why this is your favourite flavour."

"So you're saying you're gross?"

"And you're saying I'm your favourite flavour?"

_Damn... Walked right into that one._  Shoving the book into my bag, I get up to leave in a huff. He follows. And before we walk past the couple, he goes ahead of me with his long strides and takes my free hand, leading me out of the coffeehouse. Neither the man nor the woman look up at us in recognition.

I yank my hand back from him when we are outside the shop. "What are you doing?"

"I'm..."

"Is this man giving you trouble, Miss?"

We both turn around to see the cashier from the coffeehouse holding the glass door, his upper body popping out from the shop.

Ichigo shoots him a glare. "It's none of your business, brat!"

_Brat?_  I scoff inwardly.  _Does the idiot realise that he looks at least 10 years younger than the cashier?_

The man looks him up and down before he glances at me questioningly.

"It's fine. I can handle this," I tell the staff with my sweetest smile and realises instantly that my face is hurting from lack of practice.

"Are you sure?" he asks, concern evident in his eyes.

I don't have to look at Ichigo to know his fists are clenched and he is going to punch somebody soon. It would be fun to put on my schoolgirl act right now and be the damsel in distress just to annoy the hell out of him. But I do not want to see that poor human get smashed in the face by a 190-year-old death god in a gorgeous human form.

Okay, yes I think Kurosaki Ichigo looks hot in modern day attire – that black shirt on those slim-fitted jeans... In my defence, I haven't seen him in anything other than his  _shihakusho_  and the occasional  _yukata_  in over a hundred years. The last time I did, he was old and greying and looked about to kick the bucket anytime. Besides, I'm on a vacation. And so are my eyes.

"Yes, I'm sure," I say, keeping the aching smile on my face.

He looks at Ichigo again, who bares his teeth at him.

I roll my eyes.  _Men_.

The cashier turns back to me and nods. "Alright. If he bothers you, let me know and I'll call the police."

I nod – still smiling, ignoring the glare that is directed at me as I watch the cashier go back into the shop before I turn around and walk away.

* * *

Of course, the idiot would follow. Again. "Hey."

"What?" Rukia drawls.

"Where are you going?" Ichigo asks; the incident with the cashier long forgotten.

The girl keeps walking until she reaches the cinema a few blocks away from the coffeehouse and heads straight to the ticket counter, already knowing which movie she is going to watch after looking it up on the internet at Urahara's. She tells the lady behind the counter the title of the Japanese action movie and picks her seat.

Ichigo stands behind her, his chest trapping her body to the counter as he informs the lady he is taking the seat next to Rukia's. He fishes out a few bills from his wallet and hands it to the woman, beating Rukia to it.

"I can pay my own," the captain grumbles, stomping away from the counter.

Ichigo chuckles as he follows her to one of the movie posters lined up against the wall.

She turns around and holds her palm out to demand for her ticket, which is attached to his.

The former  _shinigami daiko_  shakes his head. "I'm keeping it. Want to get something to drink?"

"No," she replies.

He goes and buys a large drink anyway… and a large bag of popcorn.

Twenty minutes later, they are seated at the last row of the cinema, watching movie trailers before their show begins.

"Why are you doing this?" Rukia asks, keeping her voice as quiet as possible so she doesn't disturb the other movie goers sitting in front of them. They are the only ones in their row.

"I've never dated you before," he answers, his eyes on the screen ahead of them.

Rukia feels her heart skip a beat but she chooses to ignore it. "This is not a date."

"Why? Because I didn't ask you out?"

She keeps quiet; her violet orbs remain on the screen and they lapse into silence.

Ichigo is not lying when he says that he has followed her to the human world. He's even staying at the  _shoten_. But after so many years of training with his father and Renji, and by himself in Soul Society, he has gotten better at masking his presence. It comes second nature to him these days. The only time he releases them is during a fight or when he gets really pissed off at Isshin and Ganju.

When he arrived last night, he managed to shut the mouths of Urahara and Yoruichi, demanding a  _futon_  and a  _gigai_  to be brought for him at the training ground. He also made sure that Rukia was out on patrol when the  _senkaimon_  opened in the human world.

As they continue to stare at the motion picture that is going on before them, neither their minds are really focused on it. Ichigo, for one, is recalling what has led to him tailing her to Karakura in the first place.

_He and Renji were hanging out at the_ izakaya _– their usual Friday night post-training thing just because Ichigo had nothing better to do and life could be pretty boring for him. If it were up to the orange-haired_ shinigami _, they would be hanging out there every other night like what they used to do. But the motley crew – Ikkaku, Yumichika, Shuuhei, and Rangiku_ _–_ _was the_ izakaya _'s nightly band of customers and Ichigo never liked being there with them unless his redhead 'best friend of_ kami _-knows-since-when' was present, too._

_In the past five years, however, said best friend had not been able to spare much time for him except on Fridays. The Sixth Division_ fukutaichou _had started going out with a Shinō Academy student who was graduating the next year_ and _who looked suspiciously like Arisawa Tatsuki when she was in her teens. Incidentally, she went by the name Tsuki but she had no memories of her time in the human world. Ichigo never bothered asking. He was just happy for Renji. So were Rukia and Ichika._

_"_ _How is it going with Rukia?" Renji asked, pouring_ sake _into Ichigo's saucer._

_The Shiba Prince shrugged. "Doesn't look like we're going anywhere."_

_"_ _It's been 120 years since you moved here," Renji commented._

_"_ _124," Ichigo corrected. "But who's counting?"_

_Both men sipped their_ sake _as they watched a brawl that was happening at the other end of the room._

_"_ _Sometimes I tell myself that this is enough," Ichigo said, breaking their silence. "You know, having her as a parenting partner for Ichika, them coming over to dinner every weeknight and me going over to the Kuchiki manor every weekend. It's okay as long as it works, as long as we exist together, as long as she's around and we're not too far apart from each other."_

_"_ _But you want something more," Renji reckoned._

_Ichigo nodded mindlessly. "I want something more. That thing we had when we were recuperating after the war. Almost four weeks of bliss. It was the best non-battle time of my life. Why can't we have that now?"_

_"_ _Have you tried talking to her about it again?"_

_"_ _No. I don't want to pressure her."_

_Renji scoffed. "It's been 124 years, Strawberry. I think she would be able to excuse you if you asked her again. Take her out for a drink. Just the two of you without the whole circus."_

_"_ _Like a date?" Ichigo's brows knitted at the thought._

_"_ _You can call it what you want," Renji chuckled. "It needn't have to be a date. Just a couple of friends having a drink."_

_Ichigo sighed, propping his elbows on the tabletop as he buried his face in the palm of his hands. "I don't know if she would like that."_

_"_ _Ask her," Renji encouraged._

"It's not a date," Ichigo mumbles mid-way through the movie.

"Huh?" Rukia glances at him, wondering why he speaks up all of a sudden after watching the movie in silence for over an hour.

"We're just two friends taking a day off to hang out," he clarifies without looking away from the screen.

Rukia nods slowly, sinking deeper into her seat.

"It's not a date," Ichigo repeats, sipping his drink before offering it to her.

She takes it and drinks from his straw, digging into the bag on his lap for the popcorn before shoving them into her mouth.

He smirks and relaxes in his seat too.

* * *

Coming out of the cinema, the two death gods wince at the sudden brightness of the day. The sun is just about to set and they realise that it has rained a bit while they were inside. The streets are still wet and people at the sidewalk are careful not to move too close to the puddles on the road in case a car drives by and gives them a good splash.

Ichigo has his hands thrust deep in his pockets as he walks beside his female companion. They stroll quietly, just letting the row of shops lead them to wherever it does. Occasionally, he would steal glances at Rukia, secretly admiring the natural beauty she possesses. She doesn't have to pretend to look older in order to blend in, this time around. She appears as how she would look in her  _shinigami_  form – someone who is young even for a 20-year-old. Ichigo is amazed by how she never looks like a woman who has given birth before. She still has her slender, youthful figure after all these years. There is not a hint that she is already a mother.  _All thanks to her_ shinigami _training, I guess._

He nudges his elbow at her shoulder. "You're still such a  _chibi_ ," he baits. And gets what he asks for – a stomp on his foot. He grits his teeth as he walks on and pretends to be unaffected by the pain.

"You're lucky I'm not wearing heels," Rukia mutters. " _And_  you still look like the freakishly tall buffoon you've always been, fruit head."

Ichigo scoffs. "Careful there, Midget. Back at the coffeehouse, you were checking out this buffoon." He points a finger to his face.

"So you admit that you're a buffoon," she states.

"As long as you admit that you were checking me out." He shrugs.

Rukia chuckles. "Are you that desperate to get an approval for your looks?"

"No," he snorts. "It's just easier for you to admit it and get it over with instead of ogling in silence."

The girl stops walking altogether and stares at him in feigned astonishment, a delicate hand covers her mouth before she puts on her schoolgirl act for real. "Why, Kurosaki- _kun_ , have you been gawking at me so closely to catch me ogling?"

Ichigo flushes red, halting his steps as well. He glares at her as she playful tilts her head, smiles, and blinks like an  _anime_  doll. He huffs, "Whatever, Midget. Let's get something to eat." With that, he grabs her hand – ignoring her protests – and they begin walking again.

Several blocks and turns later, the two  _shinigami_  find themselves outside a small diner. Rukia doesn't seem to mind the handholding all that much anymore. They stand before the menu displayed at the doorway and skim through the list.

"Are you all right with this?" Ichigo asks, motioning with his free hand at the large poster propped on an easel stand.

Rukia nods. "Yeah, I guess. The dishes look new to me but I don't mind giving one of them a try."

The man leads her into the diner where they take a table at the corner of the shop. It is only when they are seated beside each other in the half-moon booth that he lets go of her hand. A waiter comes to fill their glasses with water before picking up their order of spicy caramelised beef curry, tamarind noodles, and two pints of draught beer.

"I've never taken a girl out before, let alone a noble heiress. Must have been tough on Renji," Ichigo remarks.

Rukia is half-surprised by his first statement because it means he never took Orihime out when they were married. But she doesn't question him on it and instead gives light to the last one. "Dates with Renji were no different from this one," Rukia scoffs, twirling the noodles around her fork.

"This is a date, then?" he asks before he spoons rice and beef into his mouth.

She rolls her eyes and goes back to her food.

Ichigo smirks.  _Maybe there_ is _hope_.

After paying for their dinner, Ichigo gets up and offers his hand to the still-petite  _shinigami_ , who accepts it willingly. This time, their fingers intertwine as they continue their walk around Karakura.

Rukia steals a glance at the tall man next to her and decides that she likes the serene look on his face, among all the other things that she finds herself appreciating tonight. She figures it must be because he is in a human form. After all, this is the Kurosaki Ichigo she fell in love with so many years ago. Maybe it is happening again. She isn't sure. But she is puzzled that she doesn't find any more resistance within her to the idea of falling for him again.

Sensing her wandering eyes, Ichigo lowers his gaze to meet hers and raises a brow when she doesn't look away. "You might want to take a picture. It'll last longer," he teases, giving her hand a gentle squeeze.

She rolls her eyes for the second time that night.

"You know, some day you're going to roll those purple orbs out of their sockets," he chuckles.

"Good," Rukia says. "Then, I won't have to look at that fruit head of yours ever again."

"Ouch..." Ichigo punches the spot over his heart, bringing her hand with his and eliciting yet another eye-roll.

They stop at the river where his mother died. Releasing each other's hand, the  _shinigami_  lean against the railing and watch the dark waters as the reflection of the moon begins to play across the soft ripple.

The cool night breeze and the few stars peeping over the clouds are signs that it might rain tonight. It would be a long way back to the  _shoten_.

"We may need to take shelter somewhere," Rukia says, jerking her head back at the direction they come from. She remembers them passing by a boutique hotel not far from the river. "We might not be able to make it to Urahara's in time."

"Yeah. Even though I'm kind of entertaining the idea of leaving our  _gigai_  here and finding out how these people would react to them," Ichigo chuckles.

Rukia snorts, "Sounds like something your father would say. I guess it's true what Ichika observes – that you're a lot like her  _Ojii-san_."

"Please," he groans. "That's only because she has never met her  _Obaa-san_."

At the sound of a sudden rumbling in the sky, the two trace their steps back to where the hotel is. There is no drizzle to warn them of the shower they would get themselves into and this, they realise a couple of minutes too late.

After dropping off a deposit for their stay, Ichigo and Rukia are brought to their room. It is rather small – they are only staying one night to shelter from the rain, anyway – which is just enough for two queen beds, a closet, a tea table, and a little space in between. It does, however, come with a balcony. On top of that, they are given  _yukata_  to change into while their wet clothes are being taken care of by the laundry service provided by the hotel.

Ichigo comes out of the shower to find Rukia's  _gigai_  lying on the bed. The  _shinigami_  herself is standing behind the sliding doors of the balcony, looking out as the rain washes over the town. He, too, lays his  _gigai_  on his bed before making his way towards the small captain.

Their  _shinigami_  form is not reflected on the glass door. They have no reflection. But Rukia senses his  _reiatsu_  as he approaches her from behind. It envelops her being even before she feels him snaking his arms around her waist. She leans her head back against the broad chest she was admiring earlier and lets herself relish in the comfort of his embrace. It has been so long.

Pleased that he does not get a negative response from her, Ichigo buries his face in her long tresses before placing a soft kiss on her head. "I miss this," he murmurs into her hair.

She closes her eyes as she rests her forearms over his; her fingers play with the sleeve of his  _shihakusho_. "Me too."

"I think I'm done waiting."

She chuckles before turning around in his arms to look up into his face. "I'm sorry, Ichigo," she says, lifting a hand to his cheek while she places the other on his chest. "For the wait."

Ichigo's ambers gaze back into her violets. There is no way he is going to let them go back to Soul Society the way they were before today. Tucking her hair behind her ear, he asks, "So what's it going to be now? Are we going to continue ignoring each other's feelings or do we put an end to this chase?"

She smiles as she winds her hands around his neck and plays with the hair at the nape – something she remembers he used to enjoy. "I don't remember doing any chasing, Strawberry."

He scowls and pinches one of her butt cheeks through her  _hakama_. "I'm serious, Midget. It's been 124 years. You can't tell me there's anything keeping us from being together anymore. You've seen the reincarnation of Inoue and Ishida. They are both getting their happy ending. I don't see why we can't."

Rukia sighs before she places feathery kisses on his jaw, smirking as his breath hitches at the gesture. "And if we don't? What are you going to do about it? Throw a tantrum like you always do and crash the Seireitei again?"

The hero lets out a low chuckle and bends down to nuzzle her neck. "I don't think I need to do any crashing this time. I'm pretty sure the entire Soul Society is rooting for me," he replies, his lips nip at her ear before they descend farther to nibble the skin beneath her jaw.

Suppressing a moan, the heroine bites her lower lip as her fingers travel up her partner's scalp, massaging gently the spots behind his ears.

Ichigo grunts, tugging her skin between his lips, sucking hard enough to leave a mark.

Rukia gasps. "Cocky bastard."

He lifts his head from her neck and brings his face close to hers, their lips only a breath apart. "Rukia," he whispers, sending a shiver down her spine. "No more messing with fate, please."

Her eyes glisten as they stare into his with the emotions she has long buried away deep within her. "Yeah," she breathes with a smile. "None of that anymore, Ichigo."

With that, their lips close the distance between them, sealing their fate for all eternity.

_Even though time passes, this bond will never break._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you go. It's finally done. Over 50,000 words and 19 chapters in less than a month. 
> 
> Before I proceed, let me just run you through the timeline (my timeline, that is) for the events that are significant to this fic:
> 
> 1855 – Rukia is born
> 
> 1985 – Ichigo is born
> 
> 2000 – Ichigo meets Rukia
> 
> 2003 – Yhwach ends
> 
> 2013 – First reunion (the 686 nightmare)
> 
> 2050 – Orihime dies
> 
> 2051 – Ichigo (66) moves to Soul Society
> 
> 2075 – Last human comrade (90) dies – can be Chad or Uryuu
> 
> 2175 – Rukia is 320
> 
> When I planned this chapter a couple of weeks ago, I wanted Ichigo and Rukia to end up coming back to Karakura where they first started. And I wanted a closure for our secondary OTP (not sure about you, but IshiHime has always been the other pairing I shipped) as well. With that closure, it helps Rukia to move on and allows her to give herself and Ichigo the opportunity to get back together and seal their fate. Even though they're in the human world, I also wanted them to be in their shinigami form when that happens. 
> 
> There's this... I don't know how to describe this feeling. I mean... I'm finally done! It wasn't easy. Throughout the fic I was going back and forth between getting pissed at Kubo for the shitty ending and getting all emotional when I thought of the chapters and episodes before the Thousand-Year Blood War happened. This chapter alone was a struggle because I kept seeing posts about how there were already hints on the canon pairing way before it ended. I had to play all the opening songs for the anime to bring myself back to the time when IchiRuki was so canon.
> 
> The fact that this shounen manga ends up being romanticised bothers me more than the pairings actually. Ichigo and Rukia don't have to end up marrying each other in the manga. They just have to end up as partners like how they started and as shinigami. They don't need kids to inherit their powers because we know each soul reaper has their own unique abilities. So there is no reason for any of them to start a family. 
> 
> Anyway, I don't want to end this with another rant about the god-of-all-crap ending. It is already labelled a gag manga and no matter how sad that sounds (because BLEACH started out as one of the most awesome shounen manga), there's nothing we can do about it. 
> 
> To all IRers: I'm honoured to be on this part of the fandom with all of you. Our ship still sails. Keep the fics and arts coming. 
> 
> This fic was originally completed a couple of days before the International IchiRuki Day on 26 September. I wrote one for that special day as well. I'll try to upload it soon.


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